Tuesday, 28 February 2023

Session 337 - A Cat is a Little Dragon

Date: 21 February, 22 p.p.

Moon: Crescent - Dragonwane
Zenith: The Allfather


Events:

--- Sailing the AT-RA-MEN-TAL-CRUOOOOORRRR
- We join the party at the edge of a pitch-black sea, deep in the mechanical brass bowels of Fortress-City Fate, on the lowest level of the dungeon. The edge of the lake is littered with coffins, and the group is fixing some of them together into a makeshift boat.
- Sydney looks out into the darkness, lit by the dripping rain of glowing red from above. The red liquid is juice of the cracked imp-pods somewhere above. Out there are a few islands, big chunks of broken machinery thrust up from under the slick blackness. On one there are bones around a golden glow, on another the hint of smoke and huge wings, and the last is the end of a cylindrical up-thrust piston. Somewhere there is the sound of metal on metal, like a blacksmith.
- Dorian catches a drop of red fluid on his tongue and tastes a memory! His Inheritor body of living demon clay has more in common with the black cruor than the others. He dips a finger into the cruor and it comes back pitch black... and his finger starts moving on its own...
- Swan's background in shipbuilding helps a bit, and soon they're off on their coffin-ship across the dark liquid. They row past the bone island, seeing that the golden glow is coming from a tomb in the centre of the island. The bones twitch and shiver in a non-existent wind, and when Dorian tries to streeetch his stretchable arm across the bones begin to reanimate!
- Maybe not then. Instead they aim for the big piston pillar. There are handholds leading upwards. Maybe later. For now, there's an opposite shore to investigate!

--- Dragons, Real
- On the broken metal of the shore they find some crushed coffins and small red scales rubbed up against the walls. Dorian investigates, skin shimmering translucent, and sees a puff of flame then another! It's not one but two red dragons! These are real dragons too, not the rune-dragons faced on previous occasions, and they seem rather under fed.
- The dragons think they hear something, so investigate the noise. Dorian shimmies around past them towards their pile of treasure, classic style. There's 1800 obolsworth of gems amongst the coins, so Dorian grabs those first! They can always come back for the rest...
- On the metal shoreline, Swan and Sydney are suddenly face to face with the dragons! The dragons are dead hungry, so it looks like this is the end of the line for these brave heroes...
- But do not fear! Sydney's backstory of unwarranted romantic advances activates, and the female dragon suddenly finds him rather fascinating, to the chagrin of the male dragon. They aren't a breeding pair or anything but, you know, they'd been spending so much time together you know, maybe there was something there? You know?
- They have a little argument and we discover that they're actually stuck down here. Like many of the other creatures on the lowest levels, they were in one of Fate's simulations until they suddenly found themselves born back into the real world. Glitch? Disaster? Who knows?
- Sydney offers a solution - since the dragons are too big to leave this chamber, wouldn't it be better if they were a bit smaller? He's got this Cat Ring that turns the wearer into a cat, you see, and the Metameat Necklace will allow one of the dragons to shlorp into it like a pokeball.
- The dragons agree, seeing as how leaving this place is probably better than a meagre meal of tiny people.
- The party have a quick root around in the treasure, finding such magical stuff as a shit book by Ayn Rand which bores people to sleep, Tupper's Ware which keeps food fresh, and a magnet bomb!
- As they're leaving, Cat-Dragon on Sydney's shoulder and Necklace-Dragon around Swan's neck, Swan himself gets hit by some of the swirling magic that's latent in this area! He's hit by Grotesque Healing which will heal at the cost of Charisma... so he carefully does not get hurt for the next little while.
- They pass by a crack or window that looks out over the black lake. Dorian extendo-arms his finger towards the pillar, which is just about within his extendo-reach. There's a pool of greyish liquid at the top, and he dips his blackened possessed finger in there. It comes back wet and tries to flick the liquid into people's mouths. Hmm.

--- Ring-A-Dong-Dillo
- They pass by a chamber containing... a tree! It's growing up through the battered machinery of the ground as if flung up from below, and it looks like it has a face...
- Swan slings a rock at it, and it makes an "oof" face but pretends it didn't. On its branches are acorns, some black some gold.
- We digress into the Bombadil Zone for quite some time.
- Dorian extendo-reaches towards an acorn and plucks it... which the tree does not like at all! It slashes at Dorian, growing rapidly to create a new smaller tree near his feet, which in turn grows more slashing branches!
- Swan and Dorian unsheathe their flaming swords and attack! The tree, despite its enormous attack bonus, keeps missing! It roars when the fire sears its branches, and Sydney suddenly realises that he speaks Tree!
- It doesn't go well at first, but after a big crit from Dorian the tree yields and begs for mercy. It reveals that the black acorns are infected with Cruor, and so will kill when eaten. The gold acorns grow more of his kind, little children.
- Swan is intrigued. Between the dragons and the enchanted forest of living trees and Grumblebelch the Pig-Dwarf, maybe the Wheatlands project can in fact turn this fucked up planet into a generic fantasy world!
- There are also a bunch of dead squirrels that either got killed or died from eating black acorns. The party scoop them into a bag, plus a bag of gold acorns and another bag of black acorns.

--- Troll Bridge
- They continue on, coming to a bridge. There is hushed talk from under the bridge, and a sneaky investigation reveals a little gang of Unravelled dudes living under there.
- Dorian sneaks across the bridge, but there's a weird K-THNK as he crosses the middle. Looks like it's a trapped bridge, and he's lucky he didn't set it off! The trolls heard that though, so come up to investigate.
- Seeing nothing, they decide to play some dice on the bridge. Sydney sends out his slime familiar to steal the dice and hide under the bridge... and it works!
- One of the trolls chases the slime, while the others look around to see if there are any other culprits! Swan starts intoning from the Boring Book while the trolls act aggressive! It's too late for them though, since Dorian has extendo-armed his hand to the lever that arms the bridge. It swings open on its hinges, sending the trolls into the Cruor below... alas.
- The others rope across the river as the Unravelled crawl back out of the cruor and onto land. It looks like they've gained new personalities, to the dismay of the one Unravelled who didn't fall in. He'll have to teach them dice all over again!
- Sydney attempts to trade with the new souls, but they don't really know what they have to trade and they certainly don't want ride tickets from the christmas special. The party moves on.

--- The Auto-Blacksmith
- They come to a big circular area which overlooks the Cruor. There's a big steam hammer thing which is banging away at an anvil. An array of metals are arranged on shelves on the walls, and below them they can see one of the islands - the misty one. From here they can see wyverns, and wyvern eggs!
- They test the anvil and discover that it basically swaps the metal in whatever you put in there. Steel swords to brass, silver bullets to iron, whatever to whatever really. There's also what is soon dubbed Atrametal - a black metal imbued with Cruor that drains the victim's Charisma until the Atrametal has absorbed their whole personality.
- Sydney binds his self-writing memoir in Atrametal and swaps over some of the bullets for his gun for various cold iron, silver and atrametal options. The flame spear is similarly enhanced!

--- Egg Heist!
- They could just leave but... wyvern eggs would also be great for the Wheatlands Generification Project.
- The following occurs:


- 1. Spiderclimb cast on Swan.
- 2. Swan climbs across the ceiling.
- 3. Dorian dangles down, invisible, to the island
- 4. Attach advanced Sydney's-blob-familiar-on-hand technology to Dorian.
- 5. Egg
- 6. Escape!
- 7. If attacked, stink bomb! If not, nice one!



- Dorian absolutely burns Meat Points on his invisibility, attempting to grab every last egg. When all seems lost, he chugs a few vials of Darga blood and refreshes his MP, allowing him to grab all but one egg...
- The last egg is too tempting. Luckily Sydney's got his Supreme Thief spell ready and casts it through the familiar, replacing the last egg with a perfect illusory copy!
- By the time the wyverns realise the theft, the heist crew is gone! Dorian dragged up to the ceiling by Swan's brawny arms! Wyvern eggs acquired!

Total: 7000 exp


Valuables Liberated:
- 10 wyvern eggs (5000 exp)
- Dragon scales
- Dragonscalified Armour
- Various metallurgic transformations to weaponry
- Gold and Silver Bars (25000 exp)
- 10 Squirrel Meat (10 exp)
- Bag of Black Acorns (Save or 1d10 Trauma)
- Bag of Golden Acorns (Grow into sentient acorn trees)
- 1800 obols in loose gems (1800 exp)
- Magnet Bomb (Pulls all metal into blast zone 30')
- Tupper's Ware (Keeps 5 rations fresh forever)
- Codex of Utter Tedium (Puts you to sleep after Wisdom rounds of reading or listening)
Total: 31810 exp


Foes Defeated:
- An angry tree, forced into surrender (1250 exp)
- 6 Unravelled, dunked in cruor (600 exp)
Total: 1850 exp


OOC:
- Chronicler, Cartographer & Paymaster: Carter (300 exp)
- Expedition Leader & Chef: Kitty (200 exp)
- Vanguard & Triage: George (200 exp)


Exp Totals:
- George / Swan the Swift, Level 7 Barbarian: 122156 (Level up at 128000)
- Kitty / Dorian "Ditto" DeMone, Level 7 Inheritor: 99890 (Level up at 144000)
- Carter / Sydney, Level 6 Magic-User: 43678 (Level up at 72000)
Level Up! +1d4 HP! +2 to Saves! +1 Mana! +Free Spell! +Backstory!





Tuesday, 21 February 2023

Session 336 - Dethorning Gifflewim

Date: 14 February, 22 p.p.
Moon: Waxing Gibbous - Dragon Face
Zenith: The Lady


New Backstory:
- Sydney was kissed by a cultist follower, who really shouldn't have given the power dynamics at play here! Once per session, cause someone to make a romantic advance on you.


Events:

--- The Gifflewim Gambit
- Down in the lowest level of the dungeons beneath Fate, surrounded by the slime-choked machinery that makes up the walls and corridors, Swan the Swift has been thinking deeply about the Grandfather Clock that affects the flow of time.
- He tells Sydney and Dorian his plan... to summon Gifflewim, chuck him in the clock, and reverse time until the Idea of Thorns is gone from his memories!
- It's a long shot, but it just might work! Especially since Swan the Swift has his anti-magic Globus Crucigor which protects you from magical effects as long as you hold it with both hands.
- They chant Gifflewim's name and he appears over the big G symbol they drew on the ground to add to the atmosphere! It's just his head at first, and he remembers them from the Christmas Special from a few weeks back!
- There follow many "quick cover your ears!" moments as Gifflewim tries to persuade them of the Idea of Thorns' ideology, countered by Swan's newly espoused doctrine of the Idea of Wheat!
- The conversation starts to stagnate, so Dorian engages the second phase of the plan - a Stun Cigarette! He blows the smoke into Gifflewim's face, and while the Elf reels Swan grabs at Gifflewim's robes with his teeth and drags him to the clock! They slam the door and immediately start spinning the clockface backwards and backwards as the oilslick blackness of Gifflewim's skin pulses and fades and surges and reforms and his green right hand turns back to red!
- Gifflewim collapses out from the grandfather clock and basically has no idea what just happened! More importantly, the Idea of Thorns has been purged! The last thing he remembers is someone flipping a coin, then suddenly he was inside a clock...

--- Trade?
- He is, however, bang up for a classic magic item trade!
- Sydney trades his Shield of International Day Of for a ring that turns him into a cat when worn!
- Dorian trades an electric toothbrush for a big tube of toothpaste.
- Sydney trades a holographic bridge projector for a flask of Mindflayer Juice that lets you eat brains to learn their information.
- Dorian trades a Hand of Glory for a golden Greed Demon mask that makes those nearby become cowardly.
- Swan wants to learn to Cleave but Gifflewim denies him on metagame grounds... but he could always get a Mentor.
- With that Gifflewim disappears in a puff of fragrance to go find some "memory orbs". Hmmm.

--- Next Stop: Train Derailment
- With a surprisingly huge campaign development finally sorted, it's time to keep going and maybe deal with this Shub-Wizardwrath they've been looking for!
- They follow train noises until they find a derailed London Underground train stuffed with dead commuters.
- They loot the train, finding several Rolexes, a somewhat out of place Holy Symbol of the Dead God which is made of silver set around a cracked bone, some rare inks, and a Spellbook! Very good for Sydney!
- An ill wind blows through the area, and Chaotic beings are forced to Save vs Chaos! Sydney passes, gaining a temporary extra Mana, but poor Dorian fails and has one of his powers activated against his will. Sydney casts Unseen Servant out of his new spellbook to carry their stuff at least.

--- G-G-G-Ghosts!
- They've got a branching choice between spooky ghost noises and a smell of petrol. Ghosts it is!
- The room is decked out like a sort of island colony. Spooky ghosts walk around following their former lives, and there is a big tree in the middle with something written on it...
- Dorian attempts to talk, is met with ghostly hissing, and attempts violence with his flaming sword. It is at this point that the fear hits him... the fear of Level Drain.
- They run in terror, both narratively and metanarratively, from the ghosts. Swan glimpses the words on the tree as they book it out of there - "CROATOAN".

--- Skull Cats
- Petrol smell it is, then. They go by a tar pit that neeeaarly reaches the path. They see pawprints in the tar.
- Dorian engages his Gelatinous Cube Stealth and sneaks past the pit. The big cat skull of a huge skeletal feline pokes up over the tar and watches the rest of the party. Then another... and another.
- Sydney flash-casts Spiderclimb and it goes wrong as a Chaos Burst! Happily it simply copies the spell onto everyone else in the area, that single person being Swan the Swift!
- Convenient indeed! They walk over the ceiling, avoiding the big cats, and slip away after Dorian.

--- Tadpoles and Cats
- Given choices between purple mist, more spooky ghost noises, and a sound like babies drowning, they obviously go for the babies.
- It's shallow pools with baby-headed giant tadpoles squirming around in them! One dies of bravery as it tries to bite the Greed-masked Dorian, the others simply sob.
- The next area has whip-cracking sounds in a sandy area. Giant scorpions crack their tails and burrow through sand! The party go not that way, come to a dead end... and there is a roar as they roll an encounter!
- Dorian's backstory ability activates and the encounter is with... an ordinary housecat?
- Honestly incredible that the Cat Ring was gained this session. Swan and Dorian schlorp inside-out into Metameat Necklaces, Sydney puts them on, then he puts on the ring and shrinks down to a housecat!
- It turns out that this newly met cat used to be a human, but he was playing in a cat-based world in the Styxtrix and something happened that made him get born into the real world as his character. He's got no clue what happened to the instances of his mind that are still in the data core, or even if they survived!
- In any case, he can take the party to the mighty Lord Mousebane that is his ruler. They pass through the scorpion room without incident, past some distorted people, and into the Realm of Lord Mousebane!
- There are like 30 cats in here along with Lord Mousebane himself who is a cat of noble bearing. Unlike the rest of the cats he wasn't once a human playing Cat Simulator, but a real cat awakened by the power of Shub-Wizardwrath! He left, and decided to create a little feline fiefdom down here because these human-cats clearly needed guidance and sympathy.

--- The Atramental Cruor
- Lord Mousebane offers to guide them as far as he can, so they set out on a remarkably safe journey through a turnstile, a potionarium, and to the shores of a black lake.
- They grab some random potions from the Potionarium as they go. They look... variable. But who knows?
- They reach the shores of the black lake and see a soft rain of imp matrix pod innards dribbling into a great pool of inky black. The shore is littered with coffins, because apparently putting a corpse into the blackness grants it new life.
- Dorian is fascinated by the cruor, seeing as its so similar yet different to his own clay body. He feels it drawing him towards it somehow...
- We end the session with the party constructing a crude vessel from bodged-together coffins. Next week perhaps they shall cross the threshold.

Total: 8000 exp



Foes Defeated:
- Gifflewim Himself, kinda! (1500 exp)

Total: 1500 exp


Valuables Liberated:
- Catform Ring
- Toothpaste
- Mindflayer Juice
- Greed Demon Mask (500 exp)
- 3 gold Rolexes (300 exp)
- Silver Holy Symbol of the Dead God
- Rare inks and parchments halve the cost of Spell Research
- Spellbook

Total: 800 exp


OOC:
Expedition Leader - George (100 exp)
Vanguard and Chef - Kitty (200 exp)
Paymaster and Chronicler - Carter (200 exp)



Exp Totals:
- George / Swan the Swift, Level 7 Barbarian: 111736 (Level up at 128000)
- Kitty / Dorian "Ditto" DeMone, Level 7 Inheritor: 89470 (Level up at 144000)
- Carter / Sydney, Level 5 Magic-User: 33158 (Level up at 36000)






























Tuesday, 14 February 2023

Session 335 - The Case of the Greedy Pig

Date: 31 January, 23 p.p.

Moon: Waxing Gibbous - Clean Face
Zenith: The Dead God


New Backstory:
Grumblebelch was a drummer in a Dwarven band! +1 Music
- Sydney swore never to bring life into the world... but broke that promise when he summoned forth his Familiar! +2 to your first Attack, Save and/or Skill Check each session.


Events:

--- Cancer Defeated
- The party are on the lowest level of the Brasshell deep inside Fortress-City Fate. The machinery here is twisted, pulsing, slimy. Very much broken and unmoving. In the room itself, moving around and through the pulsing slimy pillars, prowls the Cancer Monster that the Unravelled priest pointed out before leaving our intrepid adventurers here.
- Celebus greases up a skeleton with possibly-rancid butter and send it slipping out towards the creature. It attacks!
- With the monster distracted for just a moment, the party runs into the room which Iskander had previously scried into via potion and see the very gold that he saw!
- Grumblebelch sees the slimy altar, piles of gold bars stamped with twisting runes, horrible statue of a bloated tentacular entity with a man's face... and immediately grabs a gold bar.
- His body morphs and wobbles and collapses and reforms until... he has turned into a pig!



- The pig desultorily wanders out of the room, thoughts of suicide playing through his mind.
- Celebus orders a skeleton to grab another... and it's kind of fine! The gold bar is glued to its hands by magical force! Celebus realises that oh yes... he now has a skeleton with a curse attack!
- He sends the skeleton out to attack the cancer beast and it swallows the skeleton whole! Its eyes go black as it hallucinates vividly! They proceed to kill it slowly and carefully while it's too high to move.
- A replacement character turns up, an unnamed Magic-User. He picks up a gold bar, gets very depressed, and shoots himself in the head with a disintegration ray. RIP.

--- Tasty?
- Dorian devours the cancer monster and steals its cancerous regeneration.
- While he digests the horrible monster, the others decide to cook something!
- There is much discussion as Sydney refuses to eat anything containing a human bone, people trying to tell him that it's a skeleton troll bone so that's different plus it will make a good stock, and so on.
- They realise they don't have any water... until someone remembers about runes! Water is here!



- After all that it's bon appetit! Minestrolle Soup! All that careful talk around who's allowed to eat what has granted a boost to Tinkering!

--- Twisting Linearity
- After the fairly tasty meal, they head off. Luckily they've been joined by Roger's Loyal Lads, a band of Extras who found their way down here! Almost out of sight, a pig follows sulkily.
- The Lads delve further in, stealthily moving past a room with big purple shapes slithering around and heading through a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
- It's quiet going. They avoid a door like a cosmic sphincter and a cold room with gems frozen under ice, following a trumpeting noise.
- It's some big woolly mammoths! In a grassy room with entrances way too small for them! The mammoths are scared, protecting a baby mammoth in the corner of the room.
- The Lads scoot through, head round a wiggly corridor that turns and turns until it... secret doors back into the room? Odd. They all leave the mammoths alone.
- The next room has some howling holes that suck you into the void between voids! The extras run through, hundreds, even millions, of them falling into the infinite void until they clog up the holes and let everyone else through!

--- Dinosaurs?
- A loud roar, investigated, reveals a huge mechanical T-Rex! The Extras charge and are immediately consumed.



- The last survivor, the eponymous Roger, is swiftly pulled to safety by Swan the Swift.
- Jojo uses a magic punch to blind the T-Rex! The party rush through as its laser eyes flicker!

- Yeehaw
- They come to a fork. In one direction, the smell of gunpowder. In the other direction, an ominous ticking noise.
- They choose the gunpowder and come to bodies dressed as cowboys, all dead. There is a big gaping hole out the bottom of Fate, looking down at the jungles of the Dino Dome miles below!
- They spend some time talking to the spirits of the dead men and discovering their reasons for the fatal shootout. It's very silly. Then they grab the cowboys' six-shooters and head towards the mysterious ticking noise.

- Tick Tock on the Rewind Clock
- The ticking is revealed to be a big coffin-shaped grandfather clock! There's a human-shaped moulded into the back behind the pendulum.
- With a little experimentation, they discover it can reverse time for whoever's in the clock if someone else turns the hands! Why is this only worth 5000 obols anyway?
- The pig leaps in, hoping to reverse itself into a piglet and die. The hands turn back and...
- Grumblebelch appears! The clock reversed the curse!



- Roger recently of Roger's Lucky Lads runs to the big hole in the floor and plummets to his death. RIP. Tom has Grumblebelch back!
- With more of this menacing deepest level of the Brasshell to explore, the party continues on...

Total: 7000 exp

Foes Defeated:
- A Cancer Monster, killed while it was high. (500 exp)
- A mechanical T-Rex, blinded then avoided. (1500 exp)
Total: 2000 exp

Valuables Liberated:
- Time-Travel Clock (5000 exp)
- Cursed gold bars (20000 exp)
- Gold traces (2000 exp)
- 3 Wild West Pistols
- Blacksmith Tools & Gloves
Total: 27000 exp


Exp Totals:
- George / Swan the Swift, Level 7 Barbarian: 108302 (Level up at 128000)
- Kitty / Dorian "Ditto" DeMone, Level 7 Inheritor: 86036 (Level up at 144000)
- Charles / Celebus Uppytus, Level 7 Necromancer: 80134 (Level up at 144000)
- Carter / Sydney, Level 5 Magic-User: 29724 (Level up at 36000)
- Ollie / Jojo Fullbeard, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 20422 (Level up at 36000)
Level Up! +1d4 HP! +1 Spell! +1 Mana! +Backstory!
- Tom / Grumblebelch, Level 4 Dwarf: 14273 (Level up at 16000)

Tuesday, 31 January 2023

Session 334 - The Unravelled

Date: 17 January, 23 p.p.
Moon: Waxing Crescent - Dragonwane
Zenith: The Dead God


New Backstory:
- Celebus was destitute and turned to petty crime - stealing chicken sandwiches from the nastiest chicken shop in New Moondin. Luckily when he was caught they punished him by making him a taste tester, and the rest is history! +1 Dexterity
- Tyler Lockheart has a secret crush on Celebus! If your crush would be damaged in combat, you can jump in the way and take double the damage instead,


Events:

--- War Preparation
- With the door out of the room locked, the party does a bit of prep to hopefully deal with the dangerous Unravelled on the other side. Dorian gets to slurping down one of the dead monks and stealing its stretchy powers, Celebus raises the remainder as zombies, and Tyler resets the big swinging trap that they set up last week.
- Outside the door, the Unravelled monks are not well pleased by the murder of their friends. There is a bit of back and forth through the door, until Iskander gets bored and crossbows the guy on the outside!
- They are even more not well pleased and start setting up barricades on the outside. The party is sad because now they're trapped in here with nothing to eat but skeletons and like 10000 old sausages that Tyler presumably has in a big wet bag. 

--- Take the Fight to Them!
- Iskander jumps on the swinging spike trap and launches himself out the door! He discovers that they're setting up barricades, but too slow! An unfortunate monk is in the way and gets spike trapped!
- The monks have stretchy arms and attack over their barricades, but to be fair Dorian now does too! He uses the arm like a spring, smashing his sword into the enemies' faces!
- The really tall guy who's compressed himself into a long snakey fellow tries to slip past Tyler into the room, but Tyler's surfcraft is too powerful! They wrestle nobly, Tyler getting his surfboard stuck right into the guy's craw.
- The party retreats back into the room, hoping to bait them in. The skeletons quickly close the door and Celebus quickly casts his new Bone Claws spell which does exactly what you'd expect!
- Tyler keeps nailing dudes with thrown rocks, just ludicrous accuracy. You love to see it.
- Iskander kills the big giant snakey guy with his insane Fish Blades which are made of actual fish.
- A chanting sound comes from outside in the corridor. What could it be???

--- The Unravelled Cleric
- The source of the sound is soon discovered - some sort of Unravelled priest. He calls a ceasefire and asks why the ceaseless bloodshed??
- Celebus engages him in a battle of wits... achieved irl by having a glass of water with salty lemon and another one with just lemon. Who will win the battle of wits!?
- It's Celebus, but he doesn't believe it when he actually wins, declaring that there's salt in his drink even though he doesn't.
- In any case, the deed is complete, and the priest grants the party amnesty (for now) and offers to take them to the stairs down to the final level where his god waits in the darkness.
- It seems all these people have different ideas of who the Unraveller is, and everyone has an inconsistent story about what they want from their worshippers. Very strange.
- They also see one of the monks starting to knit the big snaky guy back together, starting with the face.
- After being allowed to rest in the room, heal up, and have a sleep (very kind), the priest shows them to the big grand spiral staircase that leads down to the lair of the Unraveller. He warns that there are cancerous beasts down there, and weird things out of time.
- At the bottom of the stairs, the priest points out the big cancer monster that's roving around, and says it's too powerful for him.
- Iskander drinks a Potion of Clairvoyance and detects in all the adjacent rooms... even finding some gold! Once they've killed the beast, perhaps they can get the treasure....

Total: 5000 exp

Foes Defeated:
- Several unravelled Dwarf guys (500 exp)
- Big giant snakey guy (1000 exp)
Total: 1500 exp


Exp Totals:
- Kitty / Dorian "Ditto" DeMone, Level 7 Inheritor: 80036 (Level up at 144000)
- Charles / Celebus Uppytus, Level 7 Necromancer: 74134 (Level up at 144000)
- Ollie / Iskander Fullbeard, Level 6 Fighter: 59086 (Level up at 64000)
- James G / Tyler Lockheart, Level 6 Specialist: 24859 (Level up at 48000)
Level Up! +1d6 HP +2 Skill Points! +1 to Saves! +Backstory!














Tuesday, 24 January 2023

Session 333 - Vampire Feast

Date: 10 January, 23 p.p.

Moon: Waxing Gibbous - Dragon Face
Zenith: Vorn


New Backstory:
- Dorian fought with his "father", the Dharga, after first being budded off the great flesh-tree and discovering that he had a mind and will of his own. +1 Strength
- Grumblebelch was forcefully exiled from the Dwarven arcology of Ur-Kalladh for experimenting with forbidden rock art.
- Sydney was adored by a group of cultish street urchins who he did magic tricks for. Henchmen are immune to morale checks.


Events:

--- Carbonite Woman
- Another day, another waking up under the tender ministrations of the clanking, boiling, steaming robot mother.
-The Christmas events are over, and the robo-mum is willing to look after the various treasures from the Christmas adventure. How lovely!
- Looking over the Christmas loot, they remember that they also looted something the session before that! A big slab of stone with an eight-eyed lady frozen in it. Her ears are long and elaborate. There's a keypad on the side, but nobody knows how to use it. The robot TM-RLY is pretty useless.
- But wait! With an unfurled paperclip and a little reset port, the code can be reset! The carbonite fades away, dropping the tall Red Elf lady out of the frame... and into Dorian's claggy hands and charming Ditto-face.
- Jojo, it seems, speaks Red Elf! It's an archaic version of a variety of modern Elvish that Jojo learned in history class in the distant future... or something.
- The Elf, whose name is Kinny, gives Jojo the rundown on how she came to be here. Her planet was about to die, cracked like an egg from within by the birth/death spasms of the creature in the core as it spewed its fragments out across the cosmos. Ark-Ship Fate left without her and the others who lost the lottery, so she stowed away on another ship that was hoping to catch up and rendezvous with an ark. The captain found her and locked her away in carbonite. Also she has multiple vision modes and a penchant for knives.
- Jojo nods sagely.
- With that, and the Red Elf in tow, the party head off to the Church of the Unraveller where they can hopefully find a way down even deeper! Greasy tube, anyone?

--- Wampyre
- They head out of the fire robot zone, past the water robot zone, and into the next area. The floor is sticky with black strands which creep partway up the walls, gumming up the machinery. Kinny says it's too greasy for her grease-vision to see through.
- The corridor opens out into a big hall ahead, and there's a skinny side passage. Above, a vampire hangs from the ceiling and watches. He sees them looking and laughs, "bleh!".
- Celebus huffs a Last Breath and tries to enslave the vampire... but it's too powerful! The feedback gives Celebus the willies! The vampire just chuckles again.
- While the party questions the vampire on why he's here (they're all thralls of an ancient vampire) and what he knows about this part of the dungeon (Unravelled people aren't good eating), Grumblebelch wanders off to kick down some doors.
- He sees a room with an access hatch of some sort, and another with rolling balls with bugs in them like insects in amber.
- He tries the vent, squeezing down a thin crawlspace until he reaches a grille. Through it he sees a room, a bunch of robed cultist looking guys who must be the Unravelled... and a bunch of magic items and treasure!

--- A Feast Then Dessert
- Sydney has negotiated help from the vampire in exchange for creating a feast of blood for them with a spell! Very lovely!
- The vampire flits off and returns with a few of his friends, but soon more are showing up and supping from the various blood bags and blood canapes on offer. They mention that there are demon boars hiding in the hall next door, so watch out for them eh?
- They seem happy at first... but it soon becomes apparent that this feels like real blood but doesn't satisfy at all... their baleful gazes turn upon the party.
- Celebus runs into the next room and sees the demon boars begin to charge! He chucks a vial of blood at the lead one and casts Feast. All the vampires are driven to fury and CHARGE straight in! There are tides of viscera.
- Grumblebelch runs in, sees everything, and tells the party to follow him! Quick!
- Celebus and Dorian go knock on the big temple doors at the end of the hall, hopefully distracting the guards inside, and run back before the vampires stop feeding! The doors have a big inverted G symbol on them.

--- Webby Webby Good
- Grumblebelch is in the vent again, watching the priests mill about grabbing arms and armour. He sees their skin is kind of springy like a slinky. Unravelled, one assumes. Sadly, an obviously magic spear and an obviously magic suit of chain armour are donned by the foe.
- There is a huge giant guy squatting at the end of the guard room, and before Grumblebelly's eyes the guy thins out into a long thin snake and slithers out of the room. The other guards follow...
- Grumblebelch pops out of the vent with a loud *foonk* and lands on the floor, already jogging towards the treasure chest! But he is distracted on the way as he snags some arms and armour.
- While the others grab armour of their own, and Kinny puts away a surprising number of knives, Dorian reaches the chest and opens it up.
- There is a sound like a plunger going SHLOP and a black goop splats out! It grabs at Dorian with multiple hand-like appendages!
- Grumblebelch smashes the pipes leading into the chest from behind, cutting off the glop supply and shucking the gloop from its treasure chest shell! It's clearly got a bunch of treasure embedded in it, so this isn't all bad!
- Dorian pours on some acid and Jojo casts Web on the door, then Sydney follows up by scraping the clinging glorp off of Dorian and chucking it at the webs so it sticks there and can be easily killed!

The Trappees Become the Trappers
- They decide to ambush the baddies, so Jojo and Sydney get a swinging log trap set up with various stuff from around the room.
- A monk returns, suspicious of all the banging around, and is ragdolled back by the swinging log trap! Nice!
- The monks who run in next are stabbed from the side by Celebus and Dorian!
- Jojo casts Web again, limiting the ingress from unravelled monks!
- Basically monks get webbed then stabbed to fuck by whoever's nearby.
- Kinny the Red Elf keeps being weird about knives and pretending she'll betray you then not doing it. Odd vibes.
- One of the monks has the magic spear they saw before, all fancy inlay and a strange dual spear side-by-side design. The unravelled dwarf-monk wielding it gains an extra spear and extra hands with every attack!
- It is well and truly late at this point so it's a classic Combat Cliffhanger!

Total: 6000 exp

Enemies Overcome:
- At least a few demon boars (500 exp)
- Some Unravelled dwarf guys (500 exp)
Total: 1000 exp

Loot:
- A gold blender (5000 exp)
- 2 sparkling gems (2000 exp)
- 2000 coins with the inverted G (2000 exp)
Total: 9000 exp


Exp Totals:
- George / Swan the Swift, Level 7 Barbarian: 102302 (Level up at 128000)
- Kitty / Dorian "Ditto" DeMone, Level 7 Inheritor: 78411 (Level up at 144000)
- Charles / Celebus Uppytus, Level 7 Necromancer: 72509 (Level up at 144000)
Level Up! +1d4 HP! +1 Mana! +Free Spell! +Backstory!
- Carter / Sydney, Level 5 Magic-User: 23724 (Level up at 36000)
- Ollie / Jojo Fullbeard, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 14422 (Level up at 18000)
- Tom / Grumblebelch, Level 4 Dwarf: 8273 (Level up at 16000)
Level Up! +1d10 HP! +2 to Saves! +Lorebond! +Backstory!