Thursday, 20 September 2018

Session 196 - Attack of the Clones

Another week, another LENGTHY recap!

POWERLAD punches Andromeda in the gut.
RJ dies to his own poison bite.
Flaming Fury throws herself into a room full of frog monsters and is torn apart.
Styx sets off to enter an angel.


I swear it's not on purpose that Charles always misses the big treasure hoards!




- Ollie UPGRADES Synthia with epoxy armour!



Session 196 - Attack of the Clones

Campaign Date:
Friday, 5 May, 1601
Moon Phase: Third Quarter
Zenith: The Dead God
Zodiac: Aries

New Backstory:
- RJ and the Spiderkids constantly ratted each other out for stealing things and minor misdemeanors, making them remarkably good at spotting narcs (Save vs Law to discern if someone is planning to betray you)

Treasure and Equipment:
- 300 gp (15000 exp)
- Potion #149
- A violet gem - amethyst (3750 exp)
- A green gem - chrysoprase (500 exp)
- A red gem - jasper (500 exp)
- A circular shield with central star
- 3 angular Dwarven short swords
- 3 suits of Dwarven chainmail
- The “god damn control rod” - a thick black baton topped with a large red crystal
Total: 19750 exp

Enemies Defeated:
- A stone golem (250 exp)
- 3 doppelgangers (225 exp)
Total: 475 exp

Exploration:
- Explored 7 dungeons areas (140 exp)
- 2 wandering monster rolls (100 exp)
Total: 240 exp

Events:
--- Fists of stone!
- “WHO DARES DEFILE THIS TEMPLE?” (50 exp)
- We open on the cliffhanger - a strangely squat and angular statue of Dispater rumbles to life and roars a challenge in ancient Dwarven! (50 exp)
- RJ, who speaks the old language, kneels before it on spidery limbs, flanked by his three surviving siblings, and prays for mercy. (50 exp)
- When that doesn’t work, RJ unsheathes his katana - the POWAHA! His siblings web onto the ceiling while, screaming a battlecry, he slashes directly at the stone chest of the statue! … It’s completely ineffective. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD, Andromeda, and Flaming Fury follow up! Flaming Fury smashes with her pick, POWERLAD goes low with a gut-punch, and Andromeda leaps off his back and punches it in the head! (50 exp)
- The monster hits kick up a cloud of stone dust… but as it settles the statue is unharmed! (50 exp)
- It roars and smashes RJ right in his compound-eyed face, blasting him backwards through the low pews and sending his katana skittering across the ground. From the ceiling, his siblings jeer at his failure dickishly. (50 exp)
- Despite enjoying their brothers’ failure, RJ’s siblings rope up the statue with waves of webs! The statue is held down! (50 exp)
- POWERLAD takes the opportunity to smash in with his massive hammer! It rocks straight into the statue’s face… and a single splinter of stone falls from Dispater’s face. It raises a hand to its cheek and in old Dwarven says “All that for a chip of stone?” (50 exp)
- RJ charges across the room in slow motion, roaring his challenge… but it’s mostly him pretending to run slowly so it’s lame and he doesn’t even reach the statue. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD slams back in with his hammer, but the statue deflects and punches him straight in the chest. He flies backwards, but catches onto Flaming Fury’s beard! Instead of flying back through the pews he spins round and tears off a chunk of beard! (50 exp)
- Andromeda is still on the statue’s head, and it spins its body to send her flying off! POWERLAD sees her flying past, horrified, and climbs to his feet! (50 exp)
- RJ charges back in as the statue tears its way out of the webs! He slashes with his katana, but it blocks with a hand and smashes him hard. RJ is slammed back across the room, through the back curtain, and crushed against the back wall! (50 exp)
- RJ’s carapace cracks, haemolymph welling slowly from his pudgy spider body. The spidersiblings, worry overwhelming their dickishness, scuttle across to patch him up. They’re alarmingly effective. (50 exp)
- Flaming Fury strikes back, eyes burning. She ducks under a powerful punch and rams her pick into the joint of its elbow, pulling down hard to drag it off balance. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD bursts forward, giant hammer in hand, boosting his muscles to swing in with incredible strength! He smashes the statues legs out from under it, and Flaming Fury drives her pick home. (50 exp)
- The statue slams to the floor, defeated. Its head springs off like a rockem sockem robot, clunking to the grounds. (50 exp)
- The spiderkids, seeing that RJ is feeling fine again, begin the friendly mockery once more. The group smash down some rations to feel better. (50 exp)
--- Styx makes it home
- Behind the doors of the elevator, Styx, his goblins, and the two NPC adventurers take stock of their situation. (50 exp)
- The main doors have irised shut, and angels can be heard singing from the now-revealed secret room. (50 exp)
- Styx investigates, finding a bunch of machines that seem to control the elevator. Two angels are interfacing with the machinery, overseen by a second-tier angel on its unfolded metal legs. (50 exp)
- Styx sings a request to let them up via elevator and the angels comply, bringing him and the rest up to the first floor. (50 exp)
- It’s an easy walk back to the now-permanent temporary shelter, making sure to be careful of the green slime and the robo-rat corpses. (50 exp)
- Styx briefly considers scooping up some more god powers from the nearby statue of the Lady marked on the map, but avoids it due to HP concerns. (50 exp)
- They finally arrive back in the safe room, Ilda and Lady Goth run to their friends in their adventuring party and tell them everything that happened. Styx and his minions set to planting new goblin spores to replenish their numbers. (50 exp)
- It’s iron rations and leftovers for dinner, the returning adventurers settling down for a well-earned rest while the others barricade the doors and stand guard. (50 exp)
- Before he goes to sleep, Styx prays to the Dead God who is currently in orbit overhead. It doesn’t go how he expects - the Dead God is real impatient and lively! (50 exp)
- He talks for a while to the irascible and distracted deity, who reveals various information as he rambles - Ereshkigal is assaulting the prime tentacle with beam-artillery support from Fortress-City Fate, the Rebel Dead have been forced back to defend the Barrowmaze. (50 exp)
- Styx also finds out that there is such thing as a control module for angels, and that the Seraphim mothership atop Dwimmermount has such modules within it. Time for an excursion! (50 exp)
- He asks if Ilda’s party is willing to help him acquire a control module, and to his surprise they all agree! They’ll set off in the morning… whenever that is. Time loses meaning underground. (50 exp)
--- Seeing double!
- In the chapel of Dispater, RJ leans against the wall and eats a ration to keep up his strength. Sporty Spice and Noel G guard the stairs down… and are startled when they see some strange blurry shapes ascending the steps towards them! (50 exp)
- The shapes resolve into.... Sporty Spice and Noel G?! The spiders stare at each other aghast! (50 exp)
- The blur increases to encompass both the spiders, it’s hard to tell which is which… and suddenly they’re under attack! (50 exp)
- RJ tries to work out which is which because he’s so used to spiderkid betrayals… but he fails. Before his very eyes he sees Noel G die, poisoned by his sister! Or was that the fake? (50 exp)
- Confusion mounts as Noel G accidentally bites Beetlejohn his brother. He apologises… but is it the real him? (50 exp)
- POWERLAD runs over to investigate and sees that RJ has webbed himself into a protective coccoon! He looks on in horror as his children devour each other. How to tell who’s who?? (50 exp)
-  He grabs both Sporty Spices and holds them apart - but suddenly there are two POWERLADs! One says “Put down my daughter!” and the other drops the spider… the blur continues as the POWERLADs swap positions. How to tell who’s who? (50 exp)
- Flaming Fury comes over all funny as that strange sensation she picked up at the wreckage of the alien ship begins to squirm in her head - she cries out as weird energies flow out towards one of the Beetlejohns! (50 exp)
- The Beetlejohn turns and transforms into Flaming Fury… but has been Charmed by the strange power! To Flaming Fury, who already experienced the death of one of her paradox-clones, this is wonderful! (50 exp)
- The Flaming Furies run to meet each other and laugh and dance. The doppelganger keeps telling her that she wants to kill her, but won’t because she’s having such fun! (50 exp)
- The POWERLADs have each other by the throat, so Sporty Spice skitters in with an incredible display of webwork. The POWERLADs are wrapped up tight! (50 exp)
- RJ and Sporty Spice separate the trussed up POWERLADs and try to work out which is which - hard when they keep switching places at random. (50 exp)
- The POWERLADs are asked “how did you meet your wife?” and one of them totally fails! RJ bites him and the POWERLAD transforms into a copy of RJ… only to discover that spiders aren’t immune to their own venom. The spider morphs into a clay humanoid and hits the ground with a splat, dead. (50 exp)
- Flaming Fury asks Flaming Fury if she can stick around a while, which Flaming Fury is fine with! They have friendly chats for a while, despite Flaming Fury’s insistence that she’ll have to kill Flaming Fury at some point. (50 exp)
- Belatedly, RJ sees Noel G’s body hidden under the curtain. In all the body-swapping back and forth it was the real Noel G who died to a bite from the clone of Sporty Spice. Alas, the Spiderkids will truly never be the same again. (50 exp)
--- God war denial
- POWERLAD grabs the head of the deanimated Dispater statue and carries it over to the headless statue of DIspater in the room nearby. When he places it on the neck stump, he’s filled with the blessing of Dispater! (50 exp)
- Until POWERLAD leaves Dwimmermount, he gains +2 to hit from surprise. Neato. (50 exp)
- Andromeda goes to RJ to distract herself from the shock/pleasure/fear of seeing two POWERLADs at once again, and RJ lets her borrow his copy of the POWERLAD vs the MIRROR DIMENSION manga. (50 exp)
- Almost hearing the voice of Styx somehow, the party decides to take the replicant to the frog ritual room. Hopefully it will cause religious strife by becoming a copy of whatever underwater boss monster they summoned last time! (50 exp)
- They reach the door to the ritual room and spin the wheel, opening it slowly to view the scene within… (50 exp)
- Torchlight flickers out across a sea of frog-flesh, swarms of frog monsters and the sweet smell of pheremones, an abominable croaking that rises to a cacophany! (50 exp)
- The party is FUCKING SCARED! Flaming Fury goes to slam the door shut… and finds herself being kicked into the room! She rolls tries to fight off Flaming Fury, fails, and Flaming Fury kicks her into the room! (50 exp)
- There is a scream of pain and fear as the frog monsters descend upon her, a sustained wail of “whyyyyyyy!?”. Flaming Fury slams the door shut and spins the locking wheel before turning to the rest of the party, relieved. (50 exp)
- To her shock, the wheel begins being turned from the other side! She struggles to hold it closed, and the quick-thinking spiders web it shut. Phew! The webbing shudders but holds… for now. (50 exp)
--- Friendly dwarfs
- They retrace their steps through the ruined chapel and into the next area - a large circular stepped pit with four door-shaped alcoves and an ornate hexagram at the bottom. The ceiling has an equally sized nonagram. (50 exp)
- Inspection seems to show that the alcoves could generate portals to different places, probably places in this very dungeon. They’re currently inactive though. (50 exp)
- Moving on, they come across a group of three Dwarfs! The Dwarfs seem friendly and introduce themselves, saying that they’re here hunting a Control Rod that will allow them to control the machines on this level. (50 exp)
- They also warn of threats nearby - there’s a room with a heavy robo-skeleton presence nearby, and beyond it a locked door through which a vast lake of azoth can be seen. (50 exp)
- The spiders offer to carry people across the ceiling of the robot room, and one of the Dwarfs agrees. He’s tied onto the spider’s back and Sporty Spice scuttles across the ceiling! (50 exp)
- The robo-skeletons spring up when the door is opened, but deactivate again when the door is closed behind. (50 exp)
- Meanwhile Flaming Fury checks another door, it opens onto a dark room. In the room is a fair amount of loot… and three corpses. (50 exp)
- Suspecting a trap, RJ stealths in. Unfortunately he’s not so good at it… mostly because he’s humming his stealth theme and being super obvious. (50 exp)
- Fearing the worst, Flaming Fury throws in an oil bomb and a lit torch to light the room! The corpses, surrounded by torn up bags and rolling coins, are revealed! (50 exp)
- RJ leaps forward with his POWAHA katana and slices the head from a corpse! It shears straight through the neck muscle and the head rolls towards his feet… revealing the face of Gedvar - one of the Dwarfs! (50 exp)
--- You gotta be fucking kidding
- At the same time, POWERLAD and Andromeda hear the tapping at the door to the robot room that signifies someone wants to get out. They open it and Sporty Spice crawls out, the dwarf nowhere to be seen… (50 exp)
- There is a shout of shock from RJ, and POWERLAD looks up to see the spider dropping towards him, transforming into a POWERLAD itself! (50 exp)
- With the door still open, the roboskeletons advance! POWERLAD suckerpunches Andromeda as she struggles to decide who’s who! Threads of black poison can be seen pumping through POWERLAD’s veins, sure sign that Sporty Spice bit him before he transformed! (50 exp)
- Andromeda collapses, bludgeoned by her true love, clutching at her abdomen. Bruising wells beneath her skin. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD, enraged, unleashes his Dragon Punch! Ninhursag uncoils from the stone, shattering the rock to bite down on POWERLAD with a sickening crunch! He dies, turning into a POWERLAD-shaped lump of clay and splatting onto the ground. (50 exp)
- Meanwhile, RJ turns away from the Dwarf’s head to shout a warning, and sees Flaming Fury kick one of the dwarfs into the room! He sets his spidery feet and lifts his katana as Flaming Fury slams the door closed. (50 exp)
- The Dwarf transforms into RJ - Solo Round! They run at each other screaming faux-japanese battlecries... (50 exp)
- RJ looks like he’s going for a cool overhead slash that’ll become a super rad sword lock while they yell catch phrases at each other and grunt… but instead he weaves and bites RJ in the face! (50 exp)
- RJ screams in pain as the poison pumps through his body… then collapses into a lump of clay. (50 exp)
- RJ looks out at the combat between two Flaming Furies as the door begins to swing shut. He manages to kick [loot goes here] across the threshold just before the hatch closes and mag-locks shut (50 exp)
(Tim’s going to be away for a month so this seems a fortuitous place for him to mysteriously disappear.!)
- Outside the room, Flaming Fury is once again in battle with a clone. Why won’t she leave her alone?! (50 exp)
--- Styx sets off
- On that cliffhanger, we return to Styx who has had a long rest and thus displaced himself in the game’s chronology. Several hours after the battle against the doppelgangers, Styx sets off with his gang of NPC adventurers. (50 exp)
- Next stop - the mothership! (50 exp)
Total: 3850 exp

Misc:
- Aggressive Negotiations bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Better Part of Valour bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Fame bonus (50 exp)
- Henchman Abuse bonus (50 exp)
- I Immediately Regret This Decision bonus (50 exp)
- Long deliberation bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous gore bonus (50 exp)
- Mind Control to Major Tom bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Poison is OP bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- WWE bonus (50 exp)
Total: 900 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer (Carter / Styx - 100 exp ea)
- Caller (Kitty / POWERLAD)- 100 exp)
- Mapper (Carter / Styx - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (Timothy / RJ - 100 exp)
- Quartermaster (Ollie / Flaming Fury - 100 exp)
- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Tracker (Timothy / RJ - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Ollie - 100 exp)
- Chippo Man bonus (Ollie*2- 100 exp ea.)
- Hummous Hero bonus (Timothy - 100 exp)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Timothy*2, Ollie - 500 exp ea.)
- Near Death Experience (RJ and Andromeda - 100 exp ea.)
Active Businesses:
- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1020sp. (Ratimir)
- Blood Honey Healing 4 U (Co-dependent businesses)
--- Honey Healing. Safe. 1095sp. (Bertha) +1%
--- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 10515sp. (Sir Robyn) +1%

Rumours:
-

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Several spiderkids, eliminating the Spiderkids as Extras from the game.
- RJ has a broken leg which will likely never recover… but at least the gods saw fit to grace him with many spares.

Exp Totals:
- Kitty / High Priest POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 132225 (Level up at 144000)
-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 10 (-50% exp)
--- Andromeda, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 13922 (Level up at 18000)
---- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 5 (-25% exp)
- Carter / Styx, Level 7 Goblin: 65196 (Level up at 128000)
*DING!* +1d6 HP! +1 goblin buddy! +1 Tinker! +backstory!
--- Break, Robo-Armoured Goblin Buddy
--- A bunch more goblin buddies
--- Ilda, Level 3 Fighter: 7218 (Level up at 8000)
--- Lady Goth, Level 3 Necromancer: 4870 (Level up at 9000)
*DING!* +1d4 HP! +1 level 2 spell/day! +free spell! +backstory!
- Ollie / Flaming Fury, Level 5 Dwarf: 26585 (Level up at 35200)
-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 3 (-15% exp)
- Timothy / RJ, Level 4 Spider Fighter: 14190 (Level up at 16000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +1 to hit! +1 to crit/fumble!
Absent or Retired:
- James / Ratimir, Level 6 Ratman: 33991 (Level up at 48000)  
- Charles / Zena, Level 7 Fighter: 64285 (Level up at 128000)
- Suzie / Dumbledorris2, Level 4 Inheritor: 17186 (Level up at 18000)  
- Henry / Witchfinder-Sergeant, Level 5 Cleric (Unorthodox): 14963 (Level up at 28000)
--- Erstwhile, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 3105 (Level up at 4500)
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 6 Termaxian Cleric: 52811 (Level up at 56000)
--- 4 Henchmen Undeserving of Names, Level 0 Bootlickers  
- Ollie / Synthia, Level 5 Inheritor: 24639 (Level up at 36000)
-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 2 (-10% exp)
- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 6 Magic-User: 60599 (Level up at 72000)
- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)
- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)
- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)

Thursday, 13 September 2018

Session 195 - The Summoning

LAST TIME on DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS.
Our HEROES explore the presumed RESERVOIR level of DWIMMERMOUNT!
CHAOS as frog-wrought sigils cause almost all to PRAISE an evil statue!
STYX and his GANG run to the ELEVATOR and face a horrific OOZE!
The REST of our heroes DIVE into a room only to face GIANT TICKS!
In a CLIFFHANGER ending Styx is saved by ANGELS and the others must face a LIVING STATUE!

What other terrors does Dwimmermount hold? And are our heroes prepared to save against the dreaded disease carried by the Giant Ticks?
Find out… tonight!


Also if I get any of this recap wrong do let me know so I can update the blog version... it's been a good long time since the session so it's very possible I forgot or misremembered stuff that happened!




- Ollie draws KID POWERLAD from the saturday morning cartoon dimension


Session 195 - The Summoning

Campaign Date:
Sunday, 2 May, 1601
Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous
Zenith: The Dead God
Zodiac: Ares

Treasure and Equipment:
- 13sp, 8cp (14 exp)
- A few trinkets (20 exp)
- 18 standard rations of butchered female frog monster
- 12 standard rations of butchered male frog monster
Total: 34 exp

Enemies Defeated:
- 7 giant ticks (350 exp)
- A grey blob monster (75 exp)
Total: 425 exp

Exploration:
- Explored 2 new dungeon areas (40 exp)
- Found a secret door (50 exp)
- One random encounter (50 exp)
Total: 140 exp

Events:
- Deep in Dwimmermount, surrounded by dead frog monsters, the party rests up. Zena eyes the frog monsters greedily, already planning the next experimental meal. (50 exp)
- There is a scuttling sound, and a strange fruity smell. All look around in fear as black fuzzy shapes descend from the ceiling on sticky strands… but it’s ok! The Spiderkids are back! (50 exp)



- They scuttle around, shoving each other and vaping, and the party eventually gets the full story from them. They spend weeks searching the Twinned Cities for Galaxy Johnson’s body before finding it among evidence of violence in a house in Dwarrow. RJ the weaboo spider is their de facto leader. (50 exp)



- They saw the Black Sun fall when it was hit by the spear, and managed to make their escape with his body in time. The Twinned Cities are fucked now though. They stashed the corpse in Arach-Nacha’s old chamber. (50 exp)
- They also bring news of Sir Robyn - he’s finished researching a pair of Journey to the Past spells, one aimed at the time when the infamous Wish was granted, the other aimed at the time he researched that spell in case he gets the date slightly wrong. Clever! (50 exp)
- Before they set off, Styx gives a sermon to a respectful POWERLAD while the Spiderkids get to work butchering the frog monsters. Ratimir finally arrives, trailing rats, at the smell of butchered frogflesh. (50 exp)



--- Onwards!
- As the party begins to set off, a hazy silver mist seems to pervade the chamber. Its presence dampens magic - the Spiderkids lose their lustre and POWERLAD shrinks and collapses since the magic in his muscles is all that’s keeping him upright right now. (50 exp)
- The mist dissipates after a time, and the re-muscled POWERLAD pulls himself back to his feet, confused. (50 exp)
- Zena gripes about her lack of armour and mismatched undies as they move on. The corridor is octagonal, the walls all perfectly straight and smooth. (50 exp)
- There is a humming from the walls and loud clonks from nearby as a sourceless red light fills the corridor - armoured characters brace themselves against the walls in case of a magnetic pull, but none comes. (50 exp)
- They keep going and reach a strange round door with a locking wheel - like in a submarine. In the other direction, froggy croaks reveal the presence of more of those damned frogs. Door it is! (50 exp)
- Unfortunately the locking wheel is jammed shut! They try a bunch of different techniques until the red light fades and the humming stops, disengaging the locks on the door. The wheel spins free! (50 exp)
--- Iä! Iä!
- Beyond the doors is a strange scene - three Dwarfs are shackled to the opposite wall, sobbing and throwing up frogspawn. In the middle of the room is a pool surrounded by a verdigrised ring. On the walls and ceiling is drawn one big impossible pattern glowing in the darkness. (50 exp)



- Styx puts on his azoth-infused see-no-magic glasses and just sees a fairly intricate pattern. Others aren’t so lucky… (50 exp)
- Zena heads in to check for an ambush while the Spiderkids crawl up over the ceiling… except that means they both glimpse the strange pattern. They are filled with madness and begin shrieking “ia Dagon! ia ia Tsathoggua!” (50 exp)
- They run towards an ugly wooden froglike statue in an alcove to the north of the room. The water in the pool begins to swirl… (50 exp)



- Styx, protected by his antimagic goggles, approaches the shackled Dwarfs in his angel-bot. He sees that they’re burping up frogspawn and gets Break to use a Drain Life glyph on one’s belly to abort the eggs within. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD sees this in time! Ninhursag forbids the removal of diseases, and this is certainly a disease. He twists Break’s arms and forces him to bend the glyph to reverse the process. Styx is horrified and enraged! (50 exp)
- Break’s eyes fall upon the patterns, and he too runs to worship! POWERLAD sees Andromeda run over to praise the statue, and runs to help! The water in the metal ring is rising and sloshing to ankle height. (50 exp)
- It’s a disaster! Most of the party is now worshipping the statue. The water swirling suddenly becomes clear. Ratimir, who was hoping to go fishing, looks down into impossible oceanic depths. A tumult of frog monsters swim towards the rift, framed by a softly glowing congeries of bubbles that is their city far below. (50 exp)
- A deep burbling noise, a horrible distant voice chanting in the deep, rises in the room and suddenly the worshippers are freed from their trance! They look around in confusion! (50 exp)


- this image i found is eerily similar... albeit with a much larger statue

- Lady Goth and Ilda are already running towards the way they came in. Styx scoops Break up into his robot shell and runs after them, expecting the rest of the party to follow him. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD and the rest won’t risk running past the pool! Murky shapes are already pulling themselves from the black water! POWERLAD spins the locking wheel on a close-by door and the party pile through! (50 exp)
--- Styx the Survivor
- Styx, Lady Goth, and Ilda flee through the room with all the butchered frog carcasses and down the stairs. Theirs is a fairly easy escape, sprinting down known corridors without confronting any new horrors. Yay! (50 exp)
- As they jog out into the main corridor that leads to the lift, Styx steps on a strange patch of grey slime! It begins to rot the foot of the angel-bot, drawing itself up into a hummock of greyish ooze! (50 exp)
- They chuck a burning torch at it… which immediately goes out. The slime is unfazed. (50 exp)
- Using Styx’s melting robo-angel shell as a stepping stone, the goblins and terrified NPC adventurers jump past the ooze and into the open door of the elevator. The angelbot shell is overcome by the ooze, and Styx jumps free! (50 exp)
- Bereft of elevator control button, Styx begins singing for help! He stands in the elevator doorway as the ooze flails at him with its gooey psuedopods, Vorn protecting his chainmail armour. (50 exp)
- Break uses his dragon-wrought stoneshaping abilities to begin climbing the elevator shaft, rope around his waist to bring others up with him. (50 exp)
- And lo, the gods answer! A secret door on the other side of the elevator shaft slides open, revealing two angels which run out to defend Styx and his allies from the ooze! (50 exp)



- The angels barge Styx and Bones aside to engage the slime in slippery combat and the elevator doors iris closed. Styx and co are safe! (50 exp)
--- Mitey Heroes
- Fleeing desperately from the ritual room, POWERLAD, Ratimir, Zena, and the Spiderkids pile through the airlock door and collapse into the next room. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD turns around and Hold Portal punches the door. It smashes closed and the locking wheel spins closed of its own volition. It holds! (50 exp)
- They look around the room and see a bunch of sucked-dry frog corpses… sucked dry by the giant ticks which are leaping into action even now! (50 exp)
- Two of them leap onto Zena, sticking their whole heads into her skin to feast upon her blood. She stabs at one of them, but it’s remarkably resilient. (50 exp)



- The Spiderkids run in to support her as the rest of the ticks spread out with astonishing speed! (50 exp)
- Zena screams to GET THEM OFF HER and Ratimir yells that he’s got a plan! In a single smooth motion he chucks a jar at Zena, covering her and the ticks in flammable lamp oil… (50 exp)
- Zena yells FUCK IT I CAN TAKE IT and Ratimir lights the oil, holding his shitty dog pelt ready to extinguish her when the ticks are dead! Zena screams gleefully as she burns. (50 exp)



- The ticks drop off as the fire spreads and Ratimir runs in to extinguish Zena - she burns well though and keeps ineffectually trying to stab the ticks while Ratimir runs around after her trying to quell the flames. (50 exp)
- The burning ticks fuck up the Spiderkids. They reach 0HP, which as Extras means that almost all of them are dead. Still living - RJ the weaboo spider who wields a katana and a few of his siblings. This is a tragedy! (50 exp)
- POWERLAD and Andromeda both have ticks feasting on them - POWERLAD clenches his muscles to hold the tick’s head inside his body, forcing it to drink deep of his blood until it pops! Brutal! (50 exp)



- Andromeda turns to let Zena skewer her tick to great effect! The rest of the ticks are destroyed with a combination of rat swarms and spiders. (50 exp)
- Ratimir finally puts out the fire on Zena and she seizes the blackened and burnt dog pelt to use as clothing. Très chic. (50 exp)
- While the injured chow down on some rations and try to relax despite the gurgling chants to Tsathoggua coming faintly through the locked airlock door, Ratimir pokes around the bodies and liberates some cash and trinkets. Loot! (50 exp)
--- Dispaters
- Somewhat rested, the depleted party forges onwards. The next chamber has a statue of Dispater whose head has been replaced, as usual, with that of Terms Termax. Zena reflects on her complicated relationship with her religion. (50 exp)



- The Spiderkids offer prayers to their fallen unnamed brethren. It wasn’t meant to end like this. (50 exp)
- Ratimir sends his rats out to scout an adjoining room. They return to tell him that it’s a wide open space (not nice for rats) but there’s a crack in one part of the room which is big enough for vermin to fit through, it probably goes all the way to the outside! (50 exp)



- There’s the small matter of a bunch of ticks in there though, which Ratimir rightly wants to avoid. The other way, then! (50 exp)
- The party travels a short way into a sort of chapel. There’s another statue of Dispater here, but he looks uncommonly squat and Dwarf-like. Plus it’s got its original head! (50 exp)
- There’s an old blue curtain covering the whole back wall of the chapel. POWERLAD tugs it aside to reveal some stairs down! But at the same time, the statue of Dispater comes to life and speaks in old Dwarven which RJ somehow knows.... (50 exp)
- “WHO DARES DEFILE THIS CHAPEL?” (50 exp)
Total: 2550 exp

Misc:
- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Better Part of Valour bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Escape bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Rescue bonus (50 exp)
- Henchman Abuse bonus (50 exp)
- Heresy bonus (50 exp)
- I Immediately Regret This Decision bonus (50 exp)
- Internecine Strife bonus (50 exp)
- Kill It With Fire bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous gore bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- WWE bonus (50 exp)
Total: 1000 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer (Carter / Styx - 100 exp ea)
- Caller (Kitty / POWERLAD)- 100 exp)
- Mapper (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (Charles / Zena - 100 exp)
- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Tracker (Timothy / Spiderkids - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Timothy, Charles - 100 exp ea.)
- Artapalooza bonus (Charles - 100 exp)
- Chippo Man bonus (Carter*2- 100 exp ea.)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Charles, Kitty - 500 exp ea.)
Active Businesses:
- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1020sp. (Ratimir)
- Blood Honey Healing 4 U (Co-dependent businesses)
--- Honey Healing. Safe. 1095sp. (Bertha) 📈+1%
--- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 10515sp. (Sir Robyn) 📈+1%

Rumours:
-

Death Toll and Injuries:
- The Spiderkids are no more… for now. RJ leads the last of his brethren.

Exp Totals:
- Kitty / High Priest POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 129732 (Level up at 144000)
-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 10 (-50% exp)
--- Andromeda, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 12102 (Level up at 18000)
---- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 5 (-10% exp)
- Charles / Zena, Level 7 Fighter: 64285 (Level up at 128000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +1 to hit! +1 to crit/fumble! +backstory!
- Carter / Styx, Level 6 Goblin: 60411 (Level up at 64000)
--- Break, Robo-Armoured Goblin Buddy
--- A couple of other goblin buddies
--- Ilda, Level 3 Fighter: 4925 (Level up at 8000)
--- Lady Goth, Level 2 Necromancer: 2577 (Level up at 4500)
- James / Ratimir, Level 6 Ratman: 33991 (Level up at 48000)  
- Timothy / Spiderkids, Level 4 Spider Extras: 8205 (Level up at 12000)  

Absent or Retired:
- Suzie / Dumbledorris2, Level 4 Inheritor: 17186 (Level up at 18000)  
- Henry / Witchfinder-Sergeant, Level 5 Cleric (Unorthodox): 14963 (Level up at 28000)
--- Erstwhile, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 3105 (Level up at 4500)
- Ollie / Flaming Fury, Level 5 Dwarf: 21788 (Level up at 35200)
-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 3 (-15% exp)
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 6 Termaxian Cleric: 52811 (Level up at 56000)
--- 4 Henchmen Undeserving of Names, Level 0 Bootlickers  
- Ollie / Synthia, Level 5 Inheritor: 24639 (Level up at 36000)
-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 2 (-10% exp)
- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 6 Magic-User: 60599 (Level up at 72000)
- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)
- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)

- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)