Tuesday 27 February 2018

Session 169 - We Could Be Heroes

So the current party is pretty much the Electrical Hulk, space alien Nightcrawler, the Absorbing Woman, spooky teen Sam Fisher... and their lawyer.

I love it.

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I'm hopefully done fucking around with rules now, so to summarise the big main change for those who haven't been keeping up with the thousand thousand chat messages:

- Overhauled Sneak Attack into Backstab. Triggers against enemies who are Flanked or Surprised. When you hit, roll Backstab to turn the hit into a crit.
Stealth is also more useful in combat. Roll Stealth when you're in melee range of an enemy to make them unable to target you on their next turn, plus you get +4 to hit them next round. 

A Flanked enemy is just one who's in melee range of an ally and not attacking you, so it's now mostly a skill for ganging up on enemies. Much more useful!
Having good Stealth means it's easier to set up a Backstab (+to hit, won't attack you so you guarantee Flanking), but it's not crucial any more.

There's a bunch of other little tweaks like First Aid being more lenient and Sleight of Hand having a rapid reload function, but the Stealth/Backstab stuff was the biggest overhaul.
I'll do a proper game dev change log soon.

Also new ruling on books that came up this session - spend a day reading a book to bank a book question. You can use it later at any time.This will always be the maximum result you could have rolled for that number of books.

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Oh yea and Ollie drew the SICKEST demon spider queen check this out! Intense!




Session 169 - We Could Be Heroes

Campaign Date:
Monday, 8 February, 1601
Moon Phase: Third Quarter
Zodiac: Capricorn

New Backstory:
- Randy was abandoned in the Barrowmaze by his first love. That poor poor Dwarf, no wonder he has trust issues. (Whenever you carouse you may gain a local contact of your sexual preference until you leave town)
- Synthia's recklessness and bravery in getting spiders to bite her has been very impressive to the rest of the party. (+1 Strength)
- Mori moved away from the city after he was betrayed by his "brothers" in his gang. He travelled for weeks, if not months, until he eventually fell in with the party on that fateful day. (+1 Constitution)

Enemies Defeated:
- 5 Caretakers and several Angels, drawn into conflict (400 exp)
- 3 demon spiders (225 exp)
Total: 625 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- 67sp (67 exp)
- Potion #121
- Potion #226
- 10' chain
- Animated hand obeys commands
Hand of Glory
Total: 67 exp

Exploration:
- Travelled 90 miles the other way (300 exp)
- Explored 5 dungeon rooms (100 exp)
- 1 random encounter (50 exp)
Total: 450 exp

Events:
--- Moondin
- POWERLAD wanders away from the lava and crystal trees in the centre of Moondin, soon learning that Bertha has been hanging around the library in recent weeks. (50 exp)
- He heads there and calls out to her, and she comes running! Though blind, she can recognise his shape and circulatory system with the Eyes of Ninhursag!

- The brutal poison can be seen glowing black throughout his body, and she believes him to be dying before he reassures her. They spend a sweet night together It is a happy reunion. (50 exp)
- She tells him a troubling secret even though Ninhursag frowns on secret-giving. She believes the Drakencult has given up on finding a poison that will kill only Shub-Niggurath. They're running out of time, so they're searching for a poison that will very very definitely kill the great creature at the core of the earth and damn the consequences. (50 exp)
- She shows POWERLAD her work - she's been casing the main hub of Drakencult HQ and has a map with guard posts marked and everything... and an all-seeing Hobbit?! (50 exp)


- Just then there is a rush of wings and sweet-smelling air. Sylvia Flora, lands in front of the library on her verdant wings (50 exp)
- Bertha quickly rolls up the map as POWERLAD goes out to talk to Sylvia. (50 exp)
- Sylvia tells POWERLAD that this poison he brought back is amazingly powerful! Come quick! (50 exp)
- He quickly goes in to say goodbye to Bertha. She gives him the map, and tells him to be careful. Also if he's going to see the poison, see if he can case the poison lab, people usually aren't in. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD follows Sylvia back across the vine bridges over the magma and through the trunks of the crystal trees, eventually reaching the poison laboratory of Isen Heisenberg the poison researcher. (50 exp)
- They're amazed at this poison POWERLAD brought back in his blood. It's amazing! It blows all their previous research out of the water! It's like it wants to kill! (50 exp)
- They show POWERLAD how they've already managed to combine it with their most promising poison. They have a small dish filled with flowers. When applied to a flower, the flower grows cancerously then shrivels up. But then it spreads one by one to each other flower! (50 exp)
- Isen is extremely pleased, this should mean that it will spread through the whole of Shub-Niggurath! (50 exp)
- They put a mouse into the poisoned garden and it survives! Although it does kill it when it's injected. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD promises to bring them a sample of tentacle and the source of the poison and takes his leave. But first, to pray to Ninhursag again! (50 exp)
- He prostrates herself before the great dragon and feels its favour washing over him... he gains the power of the Heart of Ninhursag and feels that he is presented with a choice. Which aspect of Ninhursag will he worship? (50 exp)


- Plants, Magma, Crystal, Size, or Ninhursag Undivided. POWERLAD considers, the great Earth rune floating in his mind, and decides... Size! (50 exp)
- He gains the power to become BIG at will! Growing a foot taller, shredding tight clothing, and gaining a +4 Strength modifier! Basically he can hulk out! (50 exp)
- He goes and buys a massive hammer. STRONG. Then he leaps into the air back towards Dwimmermount to rejoin the others. (50 exp)
- He lands down in Pembrooktonshire and stays the night in the same burnt out shack he stayed in last time, then flies off again the next morning. (50 exp)
- Soaring through the air, POWERLAD approaches Dwimmermount. He sees the angel leader in front of the red door entrance, all spinning rings and rotating sphere-fragments, and decides NOW IS THE TIME! (50 exp)
- He grabs his new great hammer, unleashes the Aspect of Size, and falls at terminal velocity towards the angel! (50 exp)
- It's a critical hit and the angel's low singing becomes suddenly discordant! It floats back, swirling rings off-kilter, before configuring its wings into beam cannon mode and firing straight at POWERLAD! (50 exp)


- POWERLAD rolls under the scathing beams and strikes in with his hammer... but he fumbles and fall! The beams pummel the earth around him and he barely evades, reaching exactly 0HP. (50 exp)
- Defeated, POWERLAD disengages and jumps back into the sky and out of sight of the angel, heading towards the encampment on the rear side of the mountain. (50 exp)
--- Several days earlier
- In the encampment on the rear side of Dwimmermount, the party is reading some books. They discover Sarpedon the Shaper is a vivimancer, and Atrahasis the Deluvial Dragon is not located to the north. (50 exp)
- After resting up overnight, they head back down into Dwimmermount and head towards the stairs Gav knows about. (50 exp)
- On the way they come across several skinned bodies floating in the centre of a cave. Maybe they got trapped in god beam stasis? (50 exp)
- Synthia carefully approaches the area with a pole outstretched, meeting a rubbery forcefield surface that slowly lets the pole in. (50 exp)
- Intrigued, she touches it with her hand... and gets slapped by a slimy psuedopod extruded from the central mass! It's some sort of mucilaginous platonic solid! (50 exp)


- Luckily for her, the jelly's stunning venom doesn't affect her due to the spider queen's blessing! It tries to envelop her, but as the psuedopods envelop her hands she activates Spider Venom! Fangs emerge from her wrists and inject thick black poison into its cuboid insides! (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn deploys a very comic booky Aim cantrip while Synthia withdraws away from the ooze, and Galaxy Johnson tries out his POWERLAD brand beam-focusing crystal to blast an instant-cast Explosion beam. (50 exp)
- It works! A great chunk is blown from the blob and it's blasted backwards! Mori follows up with an attempted surprise attack to no avail before Sir Robyn and Galaxy kill it with a combo gun/explosion attack! (50 exp)



- Synthia immediately pulls out a straw and greedily starts sucking up the jellified remains. Somehow the others manage to stomach eating rations as they watch the grisly sight.(50 exp)
- The corpses inside the thing are looted. Turns out they had a couple of potions and a length of chain on them. Sir Robyn checks out the potions and reckons one is a potion of demon control and the other is  potion of mind reading. (50 exp)
- Synthia assimilates the cube's near-invisible transparency and the party continue on. In the machine room, angels can be heard singing beyond the door to the central corridor. They are avoided. (50 exp)
- The party continues on towards the library... and run into some of the robo-skeletal caretakers! (50 exp)
- Everyone runs, Sir Robyn baiting them to follow. Galaxy Johnson reaches the machine room first and casts Spiderclimb on himself, Sir Robyn and the caretakers close behind (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn flings the door to the angels open and sings "Danger Sir Robynson! Attack detected request backup!". As the angels rush to assist, Galaxy Johnson grabs him from behind and they fall into shadow. (50 exp)
- A battle between angels and caretakers ensues. Galaxy Johnson drops Sir Robyn off with the main party then takes Randy through another shadow, ending up in front of the big iris door beyond the fighting. (50 exp)
- The holy finger bone is held up to the device beside the door but nothing happens. Oh well. They bamf past the battle again and the party move on. (50 exp)
- They head down an unexplored side passage and find an area covered in silky webs... dun dun duuuun. Sir Robyn calls out in spiderese and gets a reply! (50 exp)
- Apparently this is a spider who has defected from the queen! It wants to be left alone, and when Sir Robyn flings a false faerie fire cantrip at it the spider scurries away! (50 exp)
- Mori's infrared vision shows him three spiders within! Time to murder these traitors. Synthia and Mori stealth in to shank a spider and Galaxy Johnson dives through a shadow to attack it... but they all miss! (50 exp)


- Randy deploys his massive shield forward to act as portable cover, protecting Sir Robyn as he aims into battle with his Magic Missile targeting array. (50 exp)
- Two spiders gang up on Galaxy Johnson, biting at him with their huge fangs, but he is immune to poison due to the power of the queen! (50 exp)
- He disengages and throws himself back as Sir Robyn's pistol discharges, blowing one of the spiders into smithereens! (50 exp)
- The others beg for mercy, but Synthia uncloaks behind one and murders it. (50 exp)
- The other recoils, but before it can be similarly killed Sir Robyn offers it life in exchange for showing them the way down further into the mountain. (50 exp)
- They chain its legs and pick it up as a mobile guide, then loot the room! There's some silver here, and two very strange hand-themed items. One is a crawling hand which obeys the first person to pick it up, the other is a Hand of Glory.
- The spider looks back at his former friends longingly as they heft it towards the base camp at the back of the mountain. Might as well take it with them! (50 exp)
- Back at the camp, Sir Robyn persuades it to give the party a map of the area it knows, which it does under threat of death. (50 exp)
- Days of quietly reading books and healing up pass... until... (50 exp)
--- Several days later
- The campers are startled to hear deep angel singing and the screams of angel cannons on the other side of the mountain. What's going on?! (50 exp)
- They rush out of their scratch-built camp in time to see POWERLAD falling out of the sky! He hits the ground hard and staggers to his knees. The rest of the party run out to help him! (50 exp)



- He's helped into a makeshift tent.  Importantly, POWERLAD's connection to Ninhursag enables him to heal up real quick, even in the wilderness. They tell each other their stories. The timelines are realigned! (50 exp)
Total: 2800 exp

Misc:
- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Aggressive Negotiations bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Better Part of Valour 
bonus (50 exp)
- Bookworm bonus (50 exp)
- Breach and Clear bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Coitus boners (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Diplomancy bonus (50 exp)
- Doolittle bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Chase bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Escape bonus (50 exp)
- Enmity Inciter bonus (50 exp)
- Hard Bargain bonus (50 exp)
- I Immediately Regret This Decision bonus (50 exp)
- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)
- Mad Inventor bonus (50 exp)
- Michael Bay bonus (50 exp)
- Monster Infighting bonus (50 exp)
- Mountaineer bonus (50 exp)
- Operator as Fuck bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Poison is OP bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Ridiculously Bad Rolling bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- Tactical Fighting bonus (50 exp)
- Vore bonus (50 exp)
- What the Fuck Guys bonus (50 exp)
- WWE bonus (50 exp)
Total: 1600 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer (Charles / Galaxy Johnson - 100 exp)
- Caller (Timothy / Sir Robyn - 100 exp)
- Mapper (Fraser / Mori - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (Fraser / Mori - 100 exp)
- Quartermaster (Ollie / Synthia - 100 exp)
- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Tracker (Timothy / Sir Robyn - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Charles, Ollie - 100 exp ea.)
- Artapalooza bonus (Charles - 100 exp)
- Attacco d'Arte bonus (Ollie - 100 exp)
- Chippo Man bonus (Ollie - 200 exp)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Charles, Ollie, Kitty - 500 exp ea.)

Active Businesses:
- Honey Healing. Safe. 1095sp. (Bertha)
- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1030sp. (Ratimir)
- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 505sp. (Sir Robyn)

Rumours:
- -

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Not even one!

Exp Totals:
- Kitty / POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 80754 (Level up at 144000)-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 5 (-25% exp)
- Charles / Galaxy Johnson, Level 5 Elf (Alpdrucke): 31745 (Level up at 48000)-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 2 (-10% exp)  

- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 4 Magic-User: 16597 (Level up at 18000)
--- Randy, Level 4 Hench-Dwarf: 8747 (Level up at 17600)--- Gav, Level 0 Inclusion
- Ollie / Synthia, Level 4 Inheritor: 16935 (Level up at 18000) 
- Fraser / Mori, Level 4 Elf (Worriganger): 16465 (Level up at 24000) 

Absent or Retired:

- James / Ratimir, Level 5 Ratman: 20944 (Level up at 24000) 
- Tom / Clarence Eclair, Level 3 Specialist: 3040 (Level up at 6000)
- Tom / Aces Fontaine, Level 1 Specialist: 869 (Level up at 1500)
- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)
- Imran / Friar, Level 1 Magic User: 1040 (Level up at 2250)
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 5 Cleric: 25557 (Level up at 28000)
- Yuri / Bjorn Gunnerson, Level 2 Barbarian: 2278 (Level up at 4000)
- Sunni / Larry's Legends, Level 1 Extras: 758 (Level up at 1500)
- Fraser / Tippin, Level 1 Ratman: 1458 (Level up at 1500)
- Charles / Zena, Level 6 Fighter: 41566 (Level up at 64000)
- Tom / Meteor Power Shower, Level 2 Barbarian: 3061 (Level up at 4000)
- Nix's Retainer
--- Huz, Level 0 Hireling
- Tom / Spicy Mac, Level 2 Halfling: 3457 (Level up at 4000)
- Eleanor / Mugg, Level 2 Fighter: 2357 (Level up at 4000)
- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Amar / Amar's Cleric, Level 1 Cleric: 1413 (Level up at 1750)
- Henry / Henry's Next Character: +2084 exp
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)
- Eglė / Bob, Level 1 Dwarf: 434 (Level up at 2200)
- Will / Cecil Fulbright, Level 5 Cleric (Termaxian): 15063 (Level up at 28000)
- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)

Friday 23 February 2018

Session 168 - We're Not Here to Fuck Spiders

It's a lot of debating the merits of murdering or obeying the queen of the demon spiders this session!
POWERLAD flies off to Moondin to deliver poison and see Bertha after a whole month or so apart.
Galaxy Johnson falls for the beautifully hideous demon spider queen.
Books are found, Mori gets sneaky, and Synthia absorbs an OP poison bite!

And also, Randy levelled up again?!


- Charles draws Galaxy's new lover​


Session 168 - We're Not Here to Fuck Spiders (Unless you're Galaxy Johnson)
Campaign Date:
Thursday, 4 February, 1601
Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous
Zodiac: Capricorn

New Backstory:
- After hanging out and trading spells that morning, Sir Robyn has been looking at POWERLAD as a sort of mentor. We also discover POWERLAD's spellbook is actually a comic book, which is just the best. (At the start of each session, pick one of their skills. You can use their skill value for rolls as long as you can see and hear them)
- Mori had once saved the life of the gang member who betrayed him, making the betrayal twice as devastating. (Once per session, stumble across someone who ran away from you this session)
- Synthia has absorbed some of Andromeda's memories, specifically the pain of POWERLAD marrying another. Her revenge was, as we all know, to commit the brutal terrorist attack on the Moondin Arena. (Deal an automatic crit against the creature that first takes you below 0HP in a session)

Enemies Defeated:
- A demon spider (50 exp)
- A high-bond POWERLAD of Ereshkigal (75 exp)
Total: 170 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- A damaged scroll - Ward Against Magic
- A chess book dogeared to a page marked "Assan's Gambit"
- A book on strategy and tactics, useful to Fighters
- Book #293 - Law (100 exp)
- Book #123 - Far Qelong (100 exp)
- Book #169 - Mushroom Men (100 exp)
- Book #202 - The Nature of Goblins (100 exp)
- Book #292 - Linguistics (100 exp)
- Book #290 - Philosophy (100 exp)
- Book #238 - Moondin (100 exp)
- Book #164 - Sarpedon the Shaper (100 exp)
- Book #190 - Atrahasis, Deluvial Dragon (100 exp)
- Book #138 - Ratmen of the Underworld (100 exp)
Total: 1000 exp

Exploration:
- Explored 6 dungeon areas (120 exp)
- Travelled nearly 90 miles (300 exp)
Total: 420 exp

Events:
- It is the midst of combat! Mori, on fire, has leapt onto one of the second-tier angels with the wing cannons, jamming his knife into its leg joints! POWERLAD slides towards the other with hammers! (50 exp)
- The angel batters away at Mori with its arms to little effect. POWERLAD stumbles just before hitting the other and they go down in a tangle of limbs and brass. (50 exp)


- Mori jumps clear as Synthia swings in with her mighty axe, cleaving the the angel in two! Mori stops, drops, and rolls to get the fire off. (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn yells at the watching spiders to help, and one of them drops from the ceiling to batter at an angel with its fangs. It's not very effective. (50 exp)


- Randy, however, grows BIG due to Galaxy Johnson's sick enlarge beam. It is time for THE PAIN TRAIN! And holy shit the Pain Train is real! He plows into the remaining angel, jumping at the last second to avoid hitting POWERLAD, and crushes it against the opposite wall! (50 exp)
- The holy white glow fades and the flattened fragments of angel clatter to the ground. Randy is a beast! (50 exp)
- The great spider queen Arach-Nacha is incredibly grateful. She smiles with the bright lips behind her mandibles, and Galaxy Johnson feels that he must, MUST! Worship his queen. (50 exp)
- She promised immunity to poison and she delivers... via spreading her mandibles and smooching Galaxy's strangely alien lips with hers. A long long tongue snakes down Galaxy's throat and he chokes as it writhes down into his belly. He can faintly taste his own vomit as it withdraws. (50 exp)
- It was yuck but it worked! She says that this immunity will last a week... which means that he'll have to keep doing favours for her if he wants to keep his shots up. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD also goes for it to the queen's delight. As he experiences the weirdest kiss of his life... back in Moondin Bertha feels another pang of strange jealousy. (50 exp)
- Synthia meanwhile is pretty stoked to kill and eat this spider queen. Imagine! Unlimited poison immunity! It's fingers to temples all round the table as the party engages in intense team chat debate. Presumably the characters are exchanging hyper-meaningful glances. (50 exp)
- The party is pretty well split as to whether they save the queen or kill her. Galaxy Johnson is enamoured with his new queen, but Synthia doesn't trust her at all. Most accept the poison immunity though. (50 exp)
- During the conversation, POWERLAD tries to convert the demon spider to the worship of Ninhursag. Poison spider, poison dragon. A perfect match, surely! She declines to worship him, but does wish to ally with him! (50 exp)
- She asks POWERLAD to take a message to Ninhursag for her, who says "uh yea sure..." since Ninhursag doesn't really traditionally speak as such. Nevertheless, he agrees to take a message. (50 exp)
- He also decides to get a sample of the queen's poison to assist with Ninhursag's poison research. Unfortunately the queen refuses to be milked... she only bites flesh. (50 exp)
- Not really a problem since POWERLAD's got a week of poison resistance. He lets her bite him and pump a ton of poison into his veins. He can feel the poison burning through his system, but it doesn't affect him as it should. Nice! (50 exp)


- POWERLAD decides to take his leave after further deliberation, hoping to Fly and walk back to Moondin over the next few days. (50 exp)
- Synthia and Mori go with him. Before they leave, Synthia asks the queen if a spider escort can assist them in their trip. The queen agrees, and one of the spiders heads off with them. (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson and Sir Robyn stay to chat with the queen, keeping her distracted. The others reach the moon pool. POWERLAD keeps going, and when he's out of sight Synthia punches the spider escort in the mouth!! (50 exp)
- It's a one hit KO, unfortunately for her. She needs the spider to bite her in order to Inherit its powers. Luckily she just knocked it out, so she ties it up and waits for it to wake up (50 exp)
- POWERLAD shoots up into the sky outside! He flies over silent Muntburg and off towards Moondin with a single huge leap. (50 exp)

--- Team Spider
- Synthia slaps the spider awake and forces it to bite her. The poison rushes into her veins, but of course she's immune! Take that, spider! That crucial part over, she murders it and morphs over the body to digest it. (50 exp)


- Galaxy Johnson and Sir Robyn arrive just in time to see this gruesome sight, flesh and mud and organs wrapped around a spider's corpse. (50 exp)
- It's alright though. Soon enough Synthia has reformed back into her normal self... albeit with more of a spidery look about her. She stole both its venomous bite and its wall-crawling ability. Neat! (50 exp)
- There is yet more deliberation. Synthia really wants to eat that spider queen, but Galaxy Johnson says no not my queen! (50 exp)
- Persuading Synthia to leave it for now, they head towards that impregnable iris door to try to open it with this holy fingerbone they picked up. (50 exp)
- Angelic voices can be heard as they approach the room with those mysterious steam-spewing machines. An angel can be seen through the steam within, testing all the levers. (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn sings out an order to disengage. It works! (50 exp)
- The party head through the steamy machine room and emerge into the aftermath of a battle. It was a bloodbath. Inclusions, spiders, and even a destroyed angel. (50 exp)
- Looting the bodies turns up a partial map and some sort of chloroform-like substance. Neat! (50 exp)
- Further exploration turns up some people with weirdly exaggerated features and, holy of holies, a library! Many books are found and, subsequently, nicked. (50 exp)


- Reading ensues. Galaxy Johnson goes back to the queen and enters her den... she offers to make him her broodmate... (50 exp)

--- Team POWERLAD
- POWERLAD touches down in the mountain pass outside Pembrooktonshire. Unlike eerily silent Muntberg, Pembrooktonshire is a burnt-out wreck. POWERLAD turns away from the view and and heads to Oshregaal's place to see what's going on with him. (50 exp)
- He talks to one of the butlers at the door but is warned on the down-low that Oshregaal's feeling lonely at the moment and probably wouldn't let POWERLAD leave if he goes in to talk to him. (50 exp)
- Oh well. POWERLAD heads down into the wreckage of Pembrooktonshire and finds a fairly sturdy house to stay in overnight. (50 exp)
- The next morning he leaps up and away again towards Moondin. He has a great view over Loegria from up there. (50 exp)


- Shimmering stasis beams over Gush. The mobile city of Fate obscured by steam, a giant tentacle rising from where it once stood. Campfires on the fields around Mt Death Frost. And soon enough, the orange magma glow of Moondin. (50 exp)
- He lands outside the walls of Moondin and calls out. The first person to reply is another POWERLAD with great black dragon wings! (50 exp)
- He approaches with a winged Andromeda. POWERLAD speaks with POWERLAD, and the death of the anomalous Andromeda is revealed, to the dismay of the POWERLAD. (50 exp)
- They try to get our POWERLAD to join Ereshkigal's dragon cult, who will kill Shub-Niggurath before flying off into space with all his followers on his back. (50 exp)
-  This is too much for our POWERLAD. He stands with the living! This world will be saved! The draconic POWERLAD doesn't see the Magic Missile punch coming. (50 exp)
- The Andromeda watches this with horror and awe. She's not upset at the POWERLAD's death... she seems more relieved. She says that not all Andromedas are meant to be with POWERLADs. Bertha and POWERLAD prove that. (50 exp)
- With that, POWERLAD enters the city. He heads straight for the head of Ninhursag and the dragon priests. Ninhursag has pulled more of its massive body from the magma pool. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD lays down in worship of the great dragon. It is pleased with his devotion. POWERLAD's skin ripples as scales grow just under his skin, their green tint mixing with his natural faint electric blue. (50 exp)
- The Scales of Ninhursag grant him +1 AC, +2 to saves, and improved overnight healing rates. Hail Ninhursag! (50 exp)
- The poison has abated a little, but it still flows through his veins. POWERLAD goes to the Plant Priestess Sylvia Flora and tells her he's contributing demon spider blood to the great cause of poisoning Shub-Niggurath. (50 exp)
- She grabs out a bowl and POWERLAD drains some of his blood into it. It hisses as it hits the bowl, proof of its intense efficacy, and Sylvia is suitably impressed. (50 exp)


- Job done, POWERLAD wraps the wound on his wrist and goes off to find Bertha. They've been apart too long! He takes his leave of the dragon priests and heads into the town proper to find his true love. (50 exp)
Total: 2500 exp

Misc:
- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Aggressive Negotiations bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Bookworm bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Diplomancy bonus (50 exp)
- Doolittle bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Freudian bonus (50 exp)
- Heresy bonus (50 exp)
- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous Gore bonus (50 exp)
- Mountaineer bonus (50 exp)
- Operator as Fuck bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Poison is... not OP!!?!?!? bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- Tactical Fighting bonus (50 exp)
- Vore bonus (50 exp)
- WWE bonus (50 exp)
Total: 1150 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer (Charles / Galaxy Johnson - 100 exp)
- Caller (Timothy / Sir Robyn - 100 exp)
- Mapper (Fraser / Mori - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (Fraser / Mori - 100 exp)
- Quartermaster (Ollie / Synthia - 100 exp)
- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Tracker (Timothy / Sir Robyn - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Charles - 100 exp)
- Artapalooza bonus (Charles - 100 exp)
- Attacco d'Arte bonus (Charles - 100 exp)
- Chippo Man bonus (Ollie - 200 exp)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Fraser, Tim - 500 exp ea.)

Active Businesses:
- Honey Healing. Safe. 1095sp. (Bertha)
- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1030sp. (Ratimir)
- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 505sp. (Sir Robyn)

Rumours:

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Not even one!

Exp Totals:
- Kitty / POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 79389 (Level up at 144000)-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 4 (-20% exp)
- Charles / Galaxy Johnson, Level 5 Elf (Alpdrucke): 30038 (Level up at 48000)-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 2 (-10% exp)  
- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 4 Magic-User: 15389 (Level up at 18000)
--- Randy, Level 4 Hench-Dwarf: 8243 (Level up at 17600)
*DING!* +1d10 HP! +saves! +lorebond! +backstory!
--- Gav, Level 0 Inclusion- Fraser / Mori, Level 4 Elf (Worriganger): 15257 (Level up at 24000)
- Ollie / Synthia, Level 4 Inheritor: 15027 (Level up at 18000)

Absent or Retired:
- James / Ratimir, Level 5 Ratman: 20944 (Level up at 24000) 
- Tom / Clarence Eclair, Level 3 Specialist: 3040 (Level up at 6000)
- Tom / Aces Fontaine, Level 1 Specialist: 869 (Level up at 1500)
- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)
- Imran / Friar, Level 1 Magic User: 1040 (Level up at 2250)
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 5 Cleric: 25557 (Level up at 28000)
- Yuri / Bjorn Gunnerson, Level 2 Barbarian: 2278 (Level up at 4000)
- Sunni / Larry's Legends, Level 1 Extras: 758 (Level up at 1500)
- Fraser / Tippin, Level 1 Ratman: 1458 (Level up at 1500)
- Charles / Zena, Level 6 Fighter: 41566 (Level up at 64000)
- Tom / Meteor Power Shower, Level 2 Barbarian: 3061 (Level up at 4000)
- Nix's Retainer
--- Huz, Level 0 Hireling
- Tom / Spicy Mac, Level 2 Halfling: 3457 (Level up at 4000)
- Eleanor / Mugg, Level 2 Fighter: 2357 (Level up at 4000)
- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Amar / Amar's Cleric, Level 1 Cleric: 1413 (Level up at 1750)
- Henry / Henry's Next Character: +2084 exp
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)
- Eglė / Bob, Level 1 Dwarf: 434 (Level up at 2200)
- Will / Cecil Fulbright, Level 5 Cleric (Termaxian): 15063 (Level up at 28000)
- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)

Monday 12 February 2018

Session 167 - The Azoth Spring is Sprung

One last delve into the doomed depths of the first floor of Dwimmermount... and they find the Azoth spring! Hurrah!

Also the party is now helping the spiders against the angels in a big plot twist. I guess we'll see how that works out!

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Charles has also made a miniature for Galaxy Johnson which is pretty rad but, as we know, marks him for DEATH.
Good luck Galaxy.


Session 167 - The Azoth Spring is Sprung
Campaign Date:
Wednesday, 25 January, 1601
Moon Phase: Waxing Gibbous
Zodiac: Capricorn

New Backstory:
- POWERLAD went on a trip to the beach when he was young. While he was distracted building his Sandcastle of Solitude a big wave came and washed him out to sea! Luckily the experience made him enjoy the water. (+1 Sailing)
- Mori was in a gang of street urchins... but he was betrayed by a fellow urchin he loved enough to call brother. Mori was pushed into a hole so his "brother" could escape with riches. (If you fall, you can make a Climb check to grab onto the edge or convenient handhold part way down instead)
- Synthia awoke in the fast-flowing river Lethe and felt it washing her barely-formed body through the smooth black stones at the bottom of the river. She reveled in it. (+1 Sailing)

Enemies Defeated:
- 3 demon spiders (150 exp)
- 2 glowing beetles (20 exp)
Total: 170 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- A gallon of azoth (22730 exp)
- A holy fingerbone relic (500 exp)
Total: 23230 exp

Exploration:
- Explored 8 dungeons areas (160 exp)
- Encountered 1 group of wandering monsters (50 exp)
Total: 210 exp

Events:
- Mori opens his retroreflective eyes, seeing POWERLAD looking down the mountain at the fall of Muntberg. The boss angel still spins and sings at the entrance to the dungeon beneath, but it's lost track of the pair. (50 exp)
- On the other side of the mountain, Sir Robyn, Synthia, Randy and Gav lick their wounds and decide what to do next while building a makeshift shelter on the mountainside. (50 exp)
- Quietly and carefully, Mori and POWERLAD make their way back around the mountainside and meet up with the rest of the party. POWERLAD is pretty good at the ol' Bushcraft so helps fix the shelter to keep a bit more of the rain out. (50 exp)
- During the night, Mori disappears off to gallivant and yammer in the moonlight. Synthia catches glimpses of him on the mountainside... and also notices some mysterious malformed footprints nearby the camp. (50 exp)
- No matter, the night passes without incident. Sir Robyn, Mori, and POWERLAD compare spellbooks over breakfast so that they can borrow those good good spells. (50 exp)
- With trepidation, it is decided to have one last push into Dwimmermount to hopefully find the azoth spring his time. (50 exp)
- They head back to the Dwarf door, which duly shimmers into existence as Randy approaches. No spiders greet their descent down the short stairs into Dwimmermount. (50 exp)
- Lights are shuttered as they pass the screaming mushroom room and they reach the moon pool. There are the crumbling corpses of Inclusions in here, mostly surrounding a smashed Angel. (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn does some back-of-the-envelope calculations that predict the Angels and Inclusions should have wiped each other out by now, given the number of angels that entered and the assumed regeneration rate of the Inclusion population. That'd be nice! (50 exp)
- The gang fill up on moon water. Mori feels the moon's light filling him and he mutates further, gaining the ability to shut off light sources around him. Neat! (50 exp)
- The next room is where the barricade was previously... but the barricades have collapsed. Clearly god beams did this. Also in this room - Many dead Inclusions, a few dead spiders, and two destroyed angels. (50 exp)
- Synthia likes the look of the Angels central eyes and gets POWERLAD to help her jimmy one off. It's a bit like a camera shutter that irises open and closed. Synthia reckons it'll make an ok shield. (50 exp)
- They continue, faintly hearing angelic singing from somewhere deeper in. The next room has stacks of barrels, steel ingots, and a strange forge. (50 exp)
- Gav says this is where they were making Azoth coins, and Sir Robyn realises that the fact a forge exists means that the air in here isn't quite as flammable as he'd thought. Looks like guns are back on the menu, boys! (50 exp)
- He also says that the market for Azoth coins must have collapsed with the fall of Muntberg. Gav falls to his knees with a cry of despair, and as the echoes fade Sir Robyn can identify the angelic choir as singing combat protocols. (50 exp)
- Synthia recommends stacking the barrels full of oil around the entrance to the next area in case the party needs to cover their exit when they inevitably have to run away from something. (50 exp)
- Hissing spider noises can be heard, panicking to each other and fearful of the angels. Sir Robyn calls out to them saying that he is an emissary of the BEES! (50 exp)
- To my dismay the spiders definitely believe him, and tell him the angels are attacking the lair of their queen! Sir Robyn promises them aid, and leads them to the exit above the moon pool. (50 exp)
- As they crawl out onto the mountainside, Sir Robyn sings out in Angelic Binary that there are enemies to be destroyed here! Thankfully there is no response. (50 exp)
- He cheeses it back to the main party and they continue on past the flammable barrel trap. The next room contains shoddily made Dwarf statues, which both Gav and Randy recognise as unborn Dwarfs. Randy is horrified. (50 exp)
- The singing can be heard from a further passage, which Gav says is the direction of the azoth spring. Mori volunteers to go ahead, so Sir Robyn cantrips Invisibility and Mirror Image into a minor Zone of Inattention to make Mori less noticeable. (50 exp)
- Mori investigates with his heat vision, seeing a cool pool of some liquid, some Inclusion corpses, and racks of glass vials. (50 exp)
- Mori tells everyone its safe, and they bring in lights to show a wide but shallow pool of Azoth trickling from a breach in the wall! (50 exp)
- Synthia dips her finger in and eats some... it's AMAZING! Her mind throbs at the edges, her eyes wide as the delicious nectar sizzles on her tongue. She fills several vials for later. (50 exp)
- Mori also sips his finger in... but quickly pulls it out as it sizzles against his skin! The finger he withdraws is an unfurred human finger, but fuzzy fur quickly covers it back up as it turns back into his moon-boosted Elf form. (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn flat-out refuses to chuck a raccoon in, despite wheedling from the rest of the party. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD dips in a crossbow bolt and the substance goops around the head of the arrow like this. He dips a few of them and wraps them carefully. (50 exp)
- It turns out that the pump nearby pumps Azoth out of the pool, up through a hose, and into a small water-cooler-style bulb. Pumping ensues, and when the whole pool has been sucked up the party just twist the bulb off and stack it near the oil barrels. (50 exp)
- The angelic battle protocols and hissing of spiders are fairly close, along with the yelling of small Inclusion voices. Maybe later. Some glowing down a passage attracts the party's attention instead. (50 exp)
- At the end of the passage, some glowing beetles. Less scarab-like than the Barrowmaze ones, but on a similar glowing theme. Synthia and Mori kill them without much trouble. (50 exp)
- The rest of the party stand around a little squicked out as Synthia devours one and assimilates its glowing internal light organs. She glows faintly, and paired with the passive Inclusion vision she's got permanent darksight! (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn's raccoons start eating up the beetle's eggs in their alcove, and behind the eggs they find a fingerbone surrounded with fine gold mesh. (50 exp)

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- The other non-angel-singing room is checked out. Inside is a shrine to a nonanist goddess - the Lady. Her hands are full of gold coins. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD flips in a gold coin and gains the blessing of the Lady - +2 to saves for the next 24 hours. Sir Robyn prays and receives a similar but more short-lived blessing. (50 exp)
- Past the azoth pool and towards the sounds of battle seems to be the only way forward. Flame flickers ahead. Mori scouts it out. (50 exp)
- He sees some caretaker robot things heading out through a nearby door, so motions the others to follow. (50 exp)
- Beyond the door is a room with murals depicting humanoid figures worshipping a big orb and killing dwarfs or possibly Inclusions. (50 exp)
- A historical debate about the average height of a human being over the centuries takes so long that the sound of angel-on-spider combat has faded away. (50 exp)
- Might as well check it out then. In the wake of the battle, two dead angels and a few dead spiders lie amongst many dead inclusions. It was a bloodbath. (50 exp)
- Familiar sounds of battle are ahead, but there's a new voice mixed in amongst the rest! A woman's voice yelling for help! (50 exp)
- Cautiously the party looks into the room. It's down to two of the higher-tier angels with the wing beams vs a ragtag group of clearly hurt inclusions wielding slings. (50 exp)
- The woman's voice is coming from a disturbingly feminine spider creature, cherry-red lips glistening behind furry mandibles, each legs like a human leg ending in a graceful hand, all covered in shiny black carapace. (50 exp)
- She begs for help, promising untold riches and (gasp!) immunity to poison! POWERLAD is sold, and punches in with a Web spell... but it unravels as it hits the angels. (50 exp)
- Unperturbed, he slides in with his hammers, denting the shell of one of the angels. Mori is close behind, jamming a knife into its leg joints (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn lobs a vial of azoth intending to shoot it mid-air and shower the angels with fire, but he misses dramatically! It shatters over Mori and sets him on fire! (50 exp)
- Luckily the angel he's shanking is burnt by the close proximity of the flame. Mori screams as he keeps shanking it! (50 exp)
- The unengaged angel turns from sniping down Inclusions and takes aim at Synthia, the stasis beam grazes her as she dodges out of the way! (50 exp)
- It is late. TO BE CONTINUED. (50 exp)
Total: 2500 exp

Misc:
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Diplomancy bonus (50 exp)
- Doolittle bonus (50 exp)
- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)
- Noblebright bonus (50 exp)
- Monster Infighting bonus (50 exp)
- Mountaineer bonus (50 exp)
- Operator as Fuck bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- WWE bonus bonus (50 exp)
Total: 500 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Caller (Timothy / Sir Robyn - 100 exp)
- Mapper (Fraser / Mori - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (Fraser / Mori - 100 exp)
- Quartermaster (Ollie / Synthia - 100 exp)
- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Tracker (Timothy / Sir Robyn - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Kitty - 100 exp)
- Chippo Elf bonus (Fraser - 200 exp)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Kitty, Timothy, Fraser, Ollie - 500 exp ea.)

Active Businesses:
- Honey Healing. Safe. 1095sp. (Bertha)
- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1030sp. (Ratimir)
- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 505sp. (Sir Robyn)

Rumours:
- -

Death Toll and Injuries:
- None... yet.

Exp Totals:
- Kitty / POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 78526 (Level up at 144000)-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 3 (-15% exp)
- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 4 Magic-User: 13736 (Level up at 18000)*DING!* +1d4 HP! +1 level 2 spell/day! +free spell! +backstory!
--- Randy, Level 3 Hench-Dwarf: 7766 (Level up at 8800)--- Gav, Level 0 Inclusion
- Ollie / Synthia, Level 4 Inheritor: 13874 (Level up at 18000)*DING!* +1d6 HP! +1 Mutation Capacity! +2 Meat! +backstory!
- Fraser / Mori, Level 4 Elf (Worriganger): 13604 (Level up at 24000)
*DING!* +1d6 HP! +1 level 2 spell/day! +free spell! +saves! +backstory!

Absent or Retired:
- Charles / Galaxy Johnson, Level 5 Elf (Alpdrucke): 28680 (Level up at 48000)
-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 2 (-10% exp)
- James / Ratimir, 
Level 5 Ratman: 20944 (Level up at 24000)
- Tom / Clarence Eclair, Level 3 Specialist: 3040 (Level up at 6000)
- Tom / Aces Fontaine, Level 1 Specialist: 869 (Level up at 1500)
- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)
- Imran / Friar, Level 1 Magic User: 1040 (Level up at 2250)
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 5 Cleric: 25557 (Level up at 28000)
- Yuri / Bjorn Gunnerson, Level 2 Barbarian: 2278 (Level up at 4000)
- Sunni / Larry's Legends, Level 1 Extras: 758 (Level up at 1500)
- Fraser / Tippin, Level 1 Ratman: 1458 (Level up at 1500)
- Charles / Zena, Level 6 Fighter: 41566 (Level up at 64000)
- Tom / Meteor Power Shower, Level 2 Barbarian: 3061 (Level up at 4000)
- Nix's Retainer
--- Huz, Level 0 Hireling
- Tom / Spicy Mac, Level 2 Halfling: 3457 (Level up at 4000)
- Eleanor / Mugg, Level 2 Fighter: 2357 (Level up at 4000)
- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Amar / Amar's Cleric, Level 1 Cleric: 1413 (Level up at 1750)
- Henry / Henry's Next Character: +2084 exp
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)
- Eglė / Bob, Level 1 Dwarf: 434 (Level up at 2200)
- Will / Cecil Fulbright, Level 5 Cleric (Termaxian): 15063 (Level up at 28000)


- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)