Tuesday 29 March 2016

Session 84 - Catsplosion

Legit 20 minutes before the game starts ha ha ha

I HOPE EVERYONE HAD A GOOD EASTER
I'M STILL AT WORK SO I MIGHT BE A LITTLE LATE TO THE GAME SINCE I DID THIS RECAP INSTEAD OF LEAVING ON TIME
<3



Session 84 - CatsplosionCampaign Date:
Sunday, 07 December, 1549
Moon Phase: Third Quarter
Zodiac: Ophiuchus

New Characters:- Bohemund of the Gorga Tribe, a barbarian of Lulu's clan, wielder of clubs

Enemies Defeated:
- Seven demons of various magnitudes, massacred in short order (320 exp)
- Two fire elementals, iced (100 exp)
- A wind elemental, sucked into a glyph (75 exp)
Total: 495 exp

Treasure and Equipment:

- A ruby model of the original dragon crystal (8000 exp)
- Misc silverware (500 exp)
Total: 8500 exp

Exploration:

- Explored four unknown dungeon rooms (80 exp)
Total: 80 exp

Events:

- With the Rave Demon in tow, explored a little farther into the complex. (50 exp)
- A room with two pits is found, experimentation by cat familiar reveals that anything droppeed down one flies out the other. Cat familiar continuously mashes self against ceiling (50 exp)
- A single arrow is left bouncing in order to intrigue future explorers (50 exp)
- A room covered in holes and pressure plates is found, in the centre of the room is a great red ruby. (50 exp)
- Lulu steps in and stands on the pressure plate at the entrance. Whirring and clicking noises begin in earnest. (50 exp)
- Sparky drifts himself in on his Gloating Disk, finding the ruby covered with a strong glass case (50 exp)
- Jain blasts a Decay beam at the glass from outside, weakening it enough for Sparky to break the glass. To his dismay, he manages to knock the ruby onto the floor. (50 exp)
- Lulu uses her grabby rope to snag the ruby, pulling it off the pressure plate and filling the room with just all of the elemental blasts (50 exp)
- Sparky is knocked out and his Gloating Disk vanishes, sending him to the floor and setting off another blast of horrible death. With his last dying spasm he chucks his woebegone moggy into the hallway. (50 exp)
- Ha ha he didn't know that when he dies his familiar turns into a demon. The cat must have really hated him, because it's sucked into a singularity from which multiple demons crawl, ooze and creep. (50 exp)
- To my surprise and befuddlement, our heroes fight instead of fleeing and... wreck face? (50 exp)
- The unrelenting badness crawling from the portal in spacetime is enough to knock Stabbington out of his funk and unleash his true powah. (50 exp)
- The Rave Demon oonts-oonts-oontses its way into combat with the worst of the demons, and the others get to work hacking and slashing and generally doing a good job. (50 exp)
- With the last of them boiling away into acrid smoke and ozone, the crew abandon Sparky's corpse for a bad job and continue on, coming to a great chasm too deep to see the bottom. (50 exp) 
- On the near side of the chasm are flickering free-floating candlelights. After attempting to interact with one, they surge into vaguely man-shaped fiery forms and a powerful wind begins sucking people towards the central chasm. (50 exp)
- A mysterious barbarian turns up, having presumably followed Lulu's trail. (50 exp)
- Battle is joined once more, not particularly helped by the people clinging to the edge of the chasm. (50 exp)
- Lulu utilises her parachute cloak and grab-rope to bridge the chasm and hopefully find a way to defeat the wind elemental drawing people to their deaths. (50 exp)
- Meanwhile Jain begins crafting runes that will suck in the elementals... if they work. She uses her tentacle rope to grab at people's legs to deleterious effect. (50 exp)
- Somebody finally remembers to get the Rave Demon involved and it emerges from the tunnel mouth in hideous technocolour, nearly defeating a fire elemental before being killed itself. (50 exp)
- Stabbington shatters the fire demons into ice with his famous ice sword, it's sick. (50 exp)
- Jain gets her runes together whilst hanging from the other side, sucking the wind elemental into it and saving the day! (50 exp)
- Meanwhile a bunch of obsidian skeletons on the other side are put to rest by Lulu after she chucks their shattered bones into the chasm. (50 exp)
- The rest of the party cross the chasm via ropes and head a little further in. They find a little kitchenette with self-cooling cups. heat mats, and some fairly crap crockery and silverware.
Total: 1200 exp

Misc:

- AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Breach and Clear bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Leave a Man behind bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous Gore bonus (50 exp)
- Mad Inventor bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)
- This! Is! Sparta! bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)
- Snackbringer bonus (Stabbington, Jain Doe - 100 exp ea)
- Death's Witness bonus (Survivors - 100 exp ea.)
- Amusing Death bonus (Tom / Bohemund - 500 exp)
Total: 600 exp + bonuses

Rumours:
- None down here

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Sparky, destroyed by a chaos of elemental traps before his cat exploded into demons.

[[]]

Exp Totals:
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 6 Fighter: 53272 (Level up at 64000)
-- Dr Charmington, Level 2 Specialist (Quack): 1733 (Level up at 3000)
*DING!* +1d6 HP! +2 skill points!
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 6 Barbarian: 32542 (Level up at 64000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +2 rolls on Barbarian Level Up table!
Kyle / Jain Doe, Level 5 Dwarf: 23492 (Level up at 35200)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 16924 (Level up at 18000)
Tom / Bohemund of the Gorga Tribe, Level 2 Barbarian: 2478 (Level up at 4000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +2 rolls on the Barbarian level Up table!
Tom / Sparky, Level 2 Magic User: 4024 (Level up at 4500) *DECEASED*
Absent or Retired:
Ellie / Ellie's Necromancer, Level 1 Necromancer: 744 (Level up at 2250)
Jerry / Jerry's Next Character, Level 1 ???: 200 (Level up at ???)
Oliver R / Reynard, Level 2 Specialist (Sneak Thief): 1578 (Level up at 3000)
Charles / Zan, Spermling of Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 5214 (Level up at 7000)

Daniel / Nash, Level 1 Fighter: 455 (Level up at 2000)
Sarah / Mana, Level 4 Specialist (Thief): 13447 (Level up at 24000)
Jim / Jim's Fighter, Level 1 Fighter: 241 (Level up at 2000)
Louis / Louis' Next Character, Level 1 ???: 2062 (Level up at ???)
Oliver R / Osar, Level 2 Specialist (Dabbler): 661 (Level up at 3000)
Charlie / Le Chaz III, Level 1 Cleric: 670 (Level up at 1750)
David / Theras, Level 5 Specialist (Assassin): 13422 (Level up at 24000)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 5 Halfling: 28949 (Level up at 32000)
Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 19863 (Level up at 36000)
James / Quarion, Level 3 Elf (Gremling): 7947 (Level up at 12000)
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)
Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Tuesday 22 March 2016

Session 83 - Rave Demon Awaken!

Session 83 - Rave Demon Awaken!Campaign Date:
Saturday, 06 December, 1549
Moon Phase: Third Quarter
Zodiac: Ophiuchus

New Characters:- Hamish the Humble, a sadly doomed goblin gongfarmer with a goat head hat
- Ellie's Necromancer, a librarian who ran across tomes dark and vile.

Enemies Defeated:
- 7 clay men, sucked up or fled (175 exp)
- 10 obsidian skeletons, neutralised (100 exp)
- Lots of swarming spiders (100 exp)
Total: 375 exp

Treasure and Equipment:

- Very fancy hat
- 30 gp, 900 sp, 1500 cp (2550 exp)
Total: 2550 exp

Exploration:

- Explored three unknown dungeon rooms (60 exp)
Total: 60 exp

Events:

- Explored along one of the corridors from the world chamber, finding a mud pit and a hole in the roof leading upwards. (50 exp)
- Climbed vines to reach top, finidng a maze encrusted with plantlife. (50 exp)
- Hid from mutants in corridor as they walked past, crying about their dead mother. (50 exp)
- Explored maze, finding mirrors to reflect light and holes in the walls opened by relfecting light onto them. Found various treasures by cheating with rune magic instead of solving puzzle. (50 exp)
- On the way out, encountered a bunch of horrible swarming insects. Attempts to laser them with the puzzle laser barely worked, using Dig Grave to bury those swarmed over worked a treat though. (50 exp)
- Exited maze into hub area, decided to explore more of the complex in search of lootz (50 exp)
- Entered the hall of the clay god, now pitted and scarred from the poisonous gigasplosion that destroyed every motherfucker in the room. (50 exp)
- Went through huge double doors since any locks had been poison-exploded off, found huge stairs leading upwards for hours. (50 exp)
- The stairs finally reach the surface after walking up them for ages. No idea where it comes out though, so a macabre balloon is made from a dead skin-kite and a fire to keep it filled with hot air. (50 exp)
- The descent back down is fairly hilarious, with Jain's attempt at a floating platform to slide down on being something of a disaster, and Lulu nearly crashing into the wall in her wingsuit robe. (50 exp)
- Inside the chamber, a bunch of clay men are investigating. Jain and Lulu, as the vanguard, bust in and begin sucking them into Take Earth runes with marked success. (50 exp)
- The others arrive some moments later and join in, causing the ordinarily stoic mud men to flee (50 exp)
- The group continue into a dark room with skeleton obelisks around the place. Main complication - mud all over the obelisks so that light can't hit the obelisk eyes. (50 exp)
- Jain runs around mud-sucking and new guy Hamish the Humble gets royally messed up by a bunch of black skeletons. (50 exp)
- In a fit of not-learning-from-his-mistakes, Jumurak sees the dying Hamish and punches him right in the fucking mouth, pulling forth the Eleventh Demon of the Rave Unstoppable. It's all smoke and discoballs and negative space energy. For once, it's actually under his control. (50 exp)
- With the mud off the obelisks and the disco demon pledging its service until the group is safely out of the dungeon, thinks seem... good? (50 exp)
Total: 800 exp

Misc:

- AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Mad Inventor bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)
- Snackbringer bonus (Stabbington - 100 exp)
- Snackbringer bonus*10 (Jain Doe - 100 exp)
- Death's Witness bonus (Survivors - 100 exp ea.)
- Died in your First Session bonus (200 exp - Jerry's next character)
Total: 400 exp + bonuses

Rumours:
- None down here

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Hamish the Humble, shanked nearly to death by skeletons then sacrificed to summon the Eleventh Demon of the Rave Unstoppable.

[[]]

Exp Totals:
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 5 Barbarian: 29861 (Level up at 32000)
Kyle / Jain Doe, Level 5 Dwarf: 21314 (Level up at 35200)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 14846 (Level up at 18000)
Oliver R / Reynard, Level 2 Specialist (Sneak Thief): 1578 (Level up at 3000)
*DING!* +1d6 HP! +2 skill points!
Dominic / Dr Charmington, Level 1 Specialist (Quack): 744 (Level up at 1500)
-- Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 6 Fighter: 51094 (Level up at 64000)
Ellie / Ellie's Necromancer, Level 1 Necromancer: 744 (Level up at 2250)
Jerry / Hamish the Humble, Level 1 Fighter: 0 (Level up at 2000) *DECEASED*Jerry / Jerry's Next Character, Level 1 ???: 200 (Level up at ???)

Absent or Retired:
Tom / Sparky, Level 2 Magic User: 4024 (Level up at 4500)
Charles / Zan, Spermling of Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 5214 (Level up at 7000)

Daniel / Nash, Level 1 Fighter: 455 (Level up at 2000)
Sarah / Mana, Level 4 Specialist (Thief): 13447 (Level up at 24000)
Jim / Jim's Fighter, Level 1 Fighter: 241 (Level up at 2000)
Louis / Louis' Next Character, Level 1 ???: 2062 (Level up at ???)
Oliver R / Osar, Level 2 Specialist (Dabbler): 661 (Level up at 3000)
Charlie / Le Chaz III, Level 1 Cleric: 670 (Level up at 1750)
David / Theras, Level 5 Specialist (Assassin): 13422 (Level up at 24000)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 5 Halfling: 28949 (Level up at 32000)
Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 19863 (Level up at 36000)
James / Quarion, Level 3 Elf (Gremling): 7947 (Level up at 12000)
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)
Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Tuesday 15 March 2016

Session 82 - Fear of a Blackened Planet

"Wait what did he do?"
"He cast Summon"
"OOOoooohhhhh fuck"
"Hang on let me read out what just happened..."





Session 82 - Fear of a Blackened PlanetCampaign Date:
Friday, 05 December, 1549
Moon Phase: Third Quarter
Zodiac: Ophiuchus

Enemies Defeated:
- 40 mutant goblin things, either mind-fucked or turned insane (1000 exp)
- Goblina the Mutant Hive-Queen (1000 exp)
Total: 2000 exp

Treasure and Equipment:

- Crystal chunks from the shattered rune prison (500 exp)
Total: 500 exp

Exploration:

- Explored like... one extra corridor midst the madness (20 exp)
Total: 20 exp

Events:
- With more manpower than before, descended on the floating platform into the room with the giant crystal globe. (50 exp)
- The mutant queen, ensconced in her vegetative mass, turns to talk to people. (50 exp)
- Meanwhile countless mutant goblin things keep coming out of side corridors and milling around (50 exp)
- After further conversation where it quickly becomes obvious that she's a bit mad, she engages some sort of defence system and surrounds herself with a shimmering forcefield (50 exp)
- Battle is joined, a rune forms on the forcefield and is about to fire, various hackings and slashes are enacted (50 exp)
- Sparky attempts to draw a fire breath rune on his cat's tongue, but unfortunately draws it wrong and fries his cat's head off. (50 exp)
- The rune fires, blasting everyone near it backwards. A new one forms, Jain sprints to the forcefield and plants an explosion rune on the field, she activates it... (50 exp)
- Jain's through! She dives in through the quickly-healing breach and goes to attack Goblina. With slice of her flaming sword she cuts off all Goblina's poisonous back-stingers... but is sprayed by the venom as she does so. Luckily she survives with heavy scarring (50 exp)
- Outside, Stabbington charges through a fucking legion of the mutant things. Others hide behind a table. Jumurak punches a mutant and... (50 exp)
"When is the end of the world? Tomorrow? Next 
year? In a thousand years? Today? What will cause 
it? Will pestilence scrape every last living thing 
from the planet? Will it be the Last Judgment of 
the creator? A magical blasphemy of great power? 
Will the almighty sun burn off our water and air in a 
thousand thousand thousand years' time? Everyone 
knows that nothing lasts forever, but who knows 
when and how the end will come? Our reality is 
governed by physical laws mutable only by magic 
and divine will. Yet other realities are different. 
In some of those, imagination and thought create 
reality.
The combined sum of mankind's apocalyptic 
fears will stream through the portal between worlds, 
infecting all living creatures within 240'." (50 exp)
- Things go to shit. I get bought a lot of beer. (50 exp)
- Stabbington goes catatonic, overwhelmed by the sheer horror. The bulk of the mutants do too, and the rest begin attacking their fellows. Zea and Sparky run for the platform to escape and grapple for who will win the right to escape. (50 exp)
- Zan kicks Sparky off the ascending platform, Sparky falls and breaks his arm. Zan doesn't give a shit, barricades himself into a room above (50 exp)
- Below it is discovered that you can break someone out of ultimate prepper survivalist mode if they try to murder someone of their own species. That means Jain's fucked but luckily trapped behind a forcefield for now. She gets to work smashing the shit out of the mutant queen. (50 exp)
- The crystal globe, because it's fitting, begins a high speed rewind of the Earth through time. It rewinds through multiple dragon-caused extinction events, each almost destroying the black blight in the core of the world, until finally we see the black blight scooped out of the red-hot new-formed planet as the moon collapses back into the world. Then it all reverses to fast-forward to the present day. (50 exp)
- The paranoid murder-rage continues, resulting in the near death of Jumurak. Lulu goes full Rambo, spamming crossbow bolts and headbutts until she fucking rips out the catatonic Stabbington's eight-ball eyeball and crushes it. She eventually comes to after a long long time. (50 exp)
- Upstairs, Zan smashes Guido the Skull against his face repeatedly until he regains sanity. (50 exp)
- Finally things start to die down, some healing commences, and everything's back to near-normal. Thank goodness for that. (50 exp)
- Finally, Lulu's friend the undead dwarf is sacrificed so that Jain can punch the shit out of it until she regains sanity. Phew! (50 exp)
- Jain grabs some mystery crystal stuff from under the mutant queen's corpse, and the party get on the ascending platform to relative safety, leaving the mutants below to their grim fate.
Total: 1000 exp

Misc:

- AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa bonus (50 exp)
- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- I Immediately Regret This Decision bonus (50 exp)
- Internecine Strife bonus (50 exp)
- Kill It With Fire bonus (50 exp)
- Leave a Man Behind bonus (50 exp)
- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)
- Mad Inventor bonus (50 exp)
- Michael Bay bonus (50 exp)
- Monster Infighting bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)
- This! Is! Sparta! bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)
- What the Fuck Guys bonus (50 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Sparky, Zan - 200 exp ea.)
- Amputation bonus (Stabbington - 100 exp)
- I Know This Place bonus (Jain Doe - 100 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (Jain Doe, Zan - 100 exp ea)
- Failed Saving Throw bonus (Stabbington - 100 exp)
- Near Death Experience bonus (Jumurak, Sparky - 100 exp ea.)
Total: 950 exp + bonuses

Rumours:
- None down here

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Stabbington Shanks, not dead but in a barely conscious state for 107 weeks. ETA until ok: Thursday, 24 December, 1551. lol.
- Sparky - arm broken, single fracture. 

[[]]

Exp Totals:
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 6 Fighter: 50572 (Level up at 64000)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 5 Barbarian: 29117 (Level up at 32000)
Kyle / Jain Doe, Level 5 Dwarf: 19570 (Level up at 35200)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 14102 (Level up at 18000)
Charles / Zan, Spermling of Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 5214 (Level up at 7000)
Tom / Sparky, Level 2 Magic User: 4024 (Level up at 4500)

Absent or Retired:
Oliver R / Raingold's Specialist, Level 1 Specialist (Sneak Thief): 734 (Level up at 1500)
Daniel / Nash, Level 1 Fighter: 455 (Level up at 2000)
Sarah / Mana, Level 4 Specialist (Thief): 13447 (Level up at 24000)
Jim / Jim's Fighter, Level 1 Fighter: 241 (Level up at 2000)
Louis / Louis' Next Character, Level 1 ???: 2062 (Level up at ???)
Oliver R / Osar, Level 2 Specialist (Dabbler): 661 (Level up at 3000)
Charlie / Le Chaz III, Level 1 Cleric: 670 (Level up at 1750)
David / Theras, Level 5 Specialist (Assassin): 13422 (Level up at 24000)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 5 Halfling: 28949 (Level up at 32000)
Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 19863 (Level up at 36000)
James / Quarion, Level 3 Elf (Gremling): 7947 (Level up at 12000)
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)
Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Tuesday 8 March 2016

Session 81 - Mudmen & Mutants

Session 81 - Mudmen & MutantsCampaign Date:
Thursday, 04 December, 1549
Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous
Zodiac: Ophiuchus

New Characters:- Oliver R's Specialist, a somewhat bard-ish jack of all trades who happened to be in the dungeon after the other guy died.

Enemies Defeated:
- A clay pillar thing, beaten until he collapsed (75 exp)
- Thirteen mutated poisonous people-things, variously mutilated (325 exp)
- A clay god, doom-poisoned (1500 exp)
- Ten clay people of various morphologies, doom-poisoned (250 exp)
Total: 2150 exp

Treasure and Equipment:

- A small sackful of crystalline shards (200 exp)
Total: 200 exp

Exploration:

- Explored 6 dungeon rooms (120 exp)
Total: 120 exp

Events:
- Leaving the room of the mutation fountain, the party heads up the previously-solved weighing scales puzzle and into the next area. (50 exp)
- A bridge puzzle is found and solved, Jain's eyes light up as she discovers a new way of drawing glyphs that could change everything! She spends the rest of the session trailing after the main party and trying out new rune combos. (50 exp)
- The bridge is crossed and a T-intersection found. The next door is opened to find a clay figure on top of a column of clay, surrounded by squealing mutant horror things. (50 exp)
- Battle is joined, Stabbington charges in with trademark grace while others follow behind. Sparky attaches his cat to an arrow and fires it at the thing at the top of the pillar. The thing is displeased. (50 exp)
- Further combat reveals that the mutant things have explosive blood and can swing their entire body around to bring poisonous scorpion tails to bear. Tragically, Wolfgang is stung by one of the creatures and dies in agony. (50 exp)
- The thing on the pillar starts blasting out gluggy clay webs and chunks of living mud, Lulu's newly double-jointed nature allows her to escape, but Sparky's pretty much fucked under there. He shoots an arrow at the clay man and nails his cat instead, which temporarily dies. (50 exp)
- Jain runs in and slaps a glyph on the clay pillar that, from memory, turns a bit of it into something else with little effect. (50 exp)
- The clay dude appears to give up, with he and the column collapsing into a big pile of mud. (50 exp)
- Further exploration discovers a room containing a giant clay figure surrounded by a battle between clay people and mutants. Lulu shoots the giant figure with one of her impossibly poisonous crossbow bolts and shuts the door firmly. (50 exp)
- Another room containing various traps, cleared by a previous party, is found. An attack by a bunch of mutants is foiled by utilizing both the traps and Stabbington and Lulu's sheer combat monstrousness. (50 exp)
- Descending some stairs, various mysterious (and already cleared) doorways are discovered, along with a platform floating above a large chamber below. (50 exp)
- The platform is used to descend into the chamber, finding a bunch of dragon-related stuff and what is presumably the mutant hive queen. (50 exp)
- After a bit of messing around (including burning one of the holes the mutants come out of), the party ascends back up to ready an assault. (50 exp)
Total: 700 exp

Misc:

- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Mad Inventor bonus (50 exp)
- Michael Bay bonus (50 exp)
- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)
- Tactical Fighting bonus (50 exp)
- Trapsetter bonus (50 exp)
- WWE bonus (50 exp)
- Cartographer bonus (Sparky - 100 exp)
- Death's Witness bonus (All but the late Wolfgang - 100 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (Sparky - 100 exp)
Total: 500 exp + bonuses

Rumours:
- None down here

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Wolfgang Brown Grylls, stung to death by scorpion tails on a mutant's back. 


[[]]

Exp Totals:
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 6 Fighter: 49627 (Level up at 64000)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 5 Barbarian: 28372 (Level up at 32000)
Kyle / Jain Doe, Level 5 Dwarf: 18625 (Level up at 35200)
Tom / Sparky, Level 2 Magic User: 2979 (Level up at 4500)
DING! +1d6 HP! +1 level 1 spell/day! +1 free spell!
Oliver R / Raingold's Specialist, Level 1 Specialist (Sneak Thief): 734 (Level up at 1500)
Oliver R / Wolfgang Brown Grylls, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 3337 (Level up at 4500) *DECEASED*

Absent or Retired:
Daniel / Nash, Level 1 Fighter: 455 (Level up at 2000)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 13257 (Level up at 18000)
Charles / Zan, Spermling of Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 4169 (Level up at 7000)
Sarah / Mana, Level 4 Specialist (Thief): 13447 (Level up at 24000)
Jim / Jim's Fighter, Level 1 Fighter: 241 (Level up at 2000)
Louis / Louis' Next Character, Level 1 ???: 2062 (Level up at ???)
Oliver R / Osar, Level 2 Specialist (Dabbler): 661 (Level up at 3000)
Charlie / Le Chaz III, Level 1 Cleric: 670 (Level up at 1750)
David / Theras, Level 5 Specialist (Assassin): 13422 (Level up at 24000)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 5 Halfling: 28949 (Level up at 32000)
Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 19863 (Level up at 36000)
James / Quarion, Level 3 Elf (Gremling): 7947 (Level up at 12000)
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)
Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Wednesday 2 March 2016

Retrospective 8 - Over the Christmas Hump

Christmas always ends up with a bunch of delayed sessions, generally because the pubs need the rooms for HIGH VALUE christmas drinking engagements.
Fair enough, and the Mad Hatter lets us know in advance, unlike the Crosse Keys back in the day.

Tom appears! Session 75, with Sparky the wizard. A very different Tom to the flaky guy who kicked this whole thing off, he's one of the current stalwarts who's here every week.
Also at time of writing here in Jan 2017, he's living in our spare bedroom with his girlfriend.

He started running games of his own a few months back, does some killer art, and has a blog over here at Tom's Imaginarium Dungeons & Doritos. Check him out!

Speaking of art, Session 77 brings us our first ever Art Attack! So Charles gets credit for that, too.
This will go on to be a constant and very welcome addition to our games. I still can't quite believe my D&D game gets fan art. Wait until you see the stuff they come out with over the next few years!

Mariana left for Portugal after half a year of being in the game, but she got to fly off on a giant eagle and see her ridiculous telenovella Halfling family in one of the silliest split-party sessions I've yet run.

Gamewise, after their names were cleared, they spent a lot of time trucking around working out what they wanted to do next.
Not one, but two failed assaults on Fortress Deathfrost, an ill-fated surprise trip to Castle Gargantua which I fucked up on my end, a fair amount of traipsing around the map, a distraction at Christmas for the Christmas Special, and a couple of trips to the Dwarf Satan Dungeon aka Hammers of the God, where they eventually found their way to the Rune Dungeon.


Next year for Secret Santa I got a whole damn BOOK of all the group's art to date!

Mini Reviews:

Fortress Deathfrost
Mentioned last time, attacked several times this time. They've never really planned ahead with this place, assuming it'll be like any other dungeon and they can just stroll in and loot/kill their way through the place.
It was the way back down the mountain that was most interesting, because that horrible dwarf and the fucked up wizard chick from Deep Carbon Observatory had been working their way up the mountain in order to ambush the party. I don't know if the party ever actually worked out that's what was going on, because they kept walking past slain guard posts and defences only to walk into worse traps.
Most importantly, GUIDO WAS BORN! This guy's my fave and you'll see more of him for the rest of time. Essentially they managed to catch a dying man's soul in a talking skull, named him Guido, and took him along for the ride. He's great, and Charles made me this sick prop with a moving mouth that I use when I do his voice. Just the best.

After all the "yea man, this game is going great! I can do it! I'm doing it!" of the previous few months, having a bad session that was entirely my fault was a real bummer.
Double bummer because I'd been excited to run this thing.
A combo of "oh shit I've got to run something I wasn't expecting!" and "how about I reskin on the fly!" ended up being pretty bleh. I was bummed about this for a while, hence the downer review-apology.
I like this castle and I want to run it again

Hammers of the God
The return! Something I like about putting the recaps up on a blog and tagging them by dungeon is that I can see the session chronology from the dungeon's perspective.
Turns out nobody who was there this time had been there last time!
I'd started on the Lorebonds by this point, and Kyle aka Jain Doe the Dwarf had long remembered how rad that one Rune Guy was that one time. He was going for the Lore of the Glyphs which deals with rune magic, and was champing at the bit to go find these things!
Soon he would have his wish.
HotG is a good module by the way.

My Christmas dungeon! Rather silly, still somehow took them a while to realise the bad guy was Santa Claus even though I'd made lots of references to "dyslexic cult leader summons Satan" and was known for dumb puns.
They murdered him like he was fucking nothing, the bastards. Then rode Rudolph's reindeer team off to carpetbomb Mt Death Frost to little effect.

Forgive Us
An unfortunate case of the "Oh Fuck I Forgot Your Character Sheets" led to a one-shot with this nice little module.
It's real good and inspired the game's VERY FIRST art attack which was damn good.
I recommend running it with low level characters because they will be scared of everything. But that's all modules, really!



Tuesday 1 March 2016

Session 80 - Just Keep Slurping Out Of That Fountain That's Right Boys

Session 80 - Just Keep Slurping Out Of That Fountain That's Right Boys
Campaign Date:
Wednesday, 03 December, 1549
Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous
Zodiac: Ophiuchus

New Characters:- Nash, a leatherworker turned to a life of adventure. 

Enemies Defeated:
- I think actually... nothing?
- I suppose "befriending" that undead dwarf counts! (50 exp)
Total: 50 exp

Treasure and Equipment:

- 12 long-fingered yellow-stained claws
- A suit of self-assembling armour
- A kazoo
- 1 brass roman-style crown of leaves (1 exp)
- Some chunks of a big lumpy rock
- 7 red gems from the foreheads of dwarf statues (1400 exp)
Total: 1401 exp

Exploration:

- Travelled 132 miles (440 exp)
- Entered the Rune Dungeon (100 exp)
- Explored 9 dungeon rooms (180 exp)
- 1 secret door found (50 exp)
Total: 130 exp

Events:
- Finally back to safety, Lulu turns up somewhat plumper and a Leatherworker decides to join the crew. (50 exp)
- Following a mysterious mental pull in Jain's head, the party heads to Fate in order to grab Lulu's longship. (50 exp)
- On the way the scene of a battle is found. The yellowed claws of the gaunt slain creatures are taken in case they're useful. (50 exp)
- Reaching the river, the water is full of weirdness which gets worse as you travel upstream. (50 exp)
- The ship is parked up and a trip through the mountains begins. While travelling up a little-used path the party come across Gifflewim, some weird merchant guy who the party have fucked over previously. (50 exp)
- He refuses to deal with anybody but the newbies, and by proxy Lulu trades Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer for a suit of self-assembling armour and a presumably-magical kazoo. (50 exp)
- The party get to the entrance of the Dwarf dungeon some of them have seen before, but this time they have Jain's psychic mind-pull thing going! (50 exp)
- The entrance is marked with the symbol a sort of Dwarf version of Satan, purple smoke billows out of the entrance when opened, it's very ominous. (50 exp)
- Inside, murals with a fair amount of interesting interplay between Dwarfs and other races, purple smoke, apparently recently deceased Dwarfs and humans. (50 exp)
- Due to the shenanigans of a previous group of players, the secret door to the rear is open. Jain's direction sense takes her through. (50 exp)
- Past some fountains (whose water is collected by some) and down a grand walkway is a beach. Great girders stretch upwards out of torch range (50 exp)
- While Lulu climbs one structure, others explore, finding a weird sort of submarine attached to a cable going upwards (50 exp)
- Lulu reaches the top, discovering the gantry and control box of a crane. She sees a figure inside the control box, but luckily she was prophesied to "make a friend with a coin trick" and makes the vacant Dwarf within non-aggressive towards her. (50 exp)
- He doesn't speak but that's ok. Lulu gets to ground level with him in tow, finding the others have worked out how the submarine works in the mean time. (50 exp)
- Sparky chucks his cat out into the water where it is sucked down a giant whirlpool and horribly drowned and broken. Luckily it's his familiar so it can't actually die. (50 exp)
- Without the dwarf in the control box the submarine can be operated from the inside. Basically you turn some handles to pay out the cable from the crane, and that sucks the submersible into the whirlpool and sucks it down a huge pipe into a large pool far below. (50 exp)
- This happens. (50 exp)
- Sparky retrieves his cat as the submarine bobs about in the lower pool, floating to another beach far below with convenient stone dwarf statues to tie up on. (50 exp)
- The dwarf statues have gems in their foreheads which are, of course, stolen. Lulu looks at them through her former-life-detector device and sees they were all once living dwarfs. (50 exp)
- Avoiding anything of potential danger, the party follows Jain through a long long tunnel with glowing rune-covered arches every hundred metres or so. (50 exp)
- Very eventually the party reach the end, finding a room with glowing runes that match the magic torch Lulu's has for a long long time now. (50 exp)
- Several black obelisks have obsidian-boned skeleton standing in front of them. The skeletons collapse when their obelisks have light shed on them. (50 exp)
- The next room has a glyph in the floor that goes off like a flashbang when someone steps into the room and scuffs it. Experimentation ensues. (50 exp)
- A corridor is followed and there is, amazingly, a dude behind a door at the end. He is eventually persuaded that the party isn't made of clay and lets them in past his swelled-shut door. (50 exp)
- He has a book on glyphs he stole from somewhere, and so Wolfgang punches it with his newly-acquired Bookspeak spell which was very convenient to have. The book tells the party what all the different types of runes are which is nice. (50 exp)
- The dude decides to sort of hang around muttering, and the party continue, coming across a sort of rune-based weighing scale puzzle. When it is solved, the platform raises up to an upper door and also opens a secret door on the lower level. (50 exp)
- Inside, a chamber with a fountain and shallow bowls. The fountain is naturally drunk from, granting stat increases (yay!) followed by mutations on subsequent sips. Things get crazy before we end the session there, you'll have to see the mutations for yourself. (50 exp)
Total: 1350 exp

Misc:

- Diplomacy bonus (50 exp)
- Hard Bargain bonus (50 exp)
- Operator as Fuck bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- Party Treasurer bonus (Jain Doe - 100 exp)
- Mutatis Mutandis bonus (Lulu, Sparky, Jain - 100 exp ea.)
Total: 250 exp + bonuses

Rumours:
- Some sort of strange spider society controls the towns around Dwimmermount, growing ever stronger.
- I've seen zombies shrug off wounds that would kill the toughest man! They're unstoppable!
- The rats gnawing on the flesh and bones of the dead are growing to enormous size
- The Bishop of Galth was attacked a few weeks ago! Those present say there was a sound like a great bell and his assailants were sent fleeing while shrieking praises to Eris and the Dead God!
- That group of demon hunters the Fated King pardoned? They went up Mt Death Frost. Some say to kill the Necromancer Overlord... others say it is to join him.
- There are farmers out there who survive in spite of the Dead. I know the Rodbroks, at least, fortified their farm before the hordes closed in. I've no idea how they fare now, of course.
- The yellow-clawed monsters can stop a man's heart cold with a single touch!

Death Toll and Injuries:
- None! Except for a particularly bedraggled cat.

[[]]

Exp Totals:
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 6 Fighter: 48793 (Level up at 64000)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 5 Barbarian: 27538 (Level up at 32000)
Kyle / Jain Doe, Level 5 Dwarf: 17791 (Level up at 35200)
*DING!* +1d10 HP! +Lorebond!
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 13257 (Level up at 18000)
Oliver R / Wolfgang Brown Grylls, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 3337 (Level up at 4500)
Tom / Sparky, Level 1 Magic User: 1945 (Level up at 2250)
Daniel / Nash, Level 1 Fighter: 455 (Level up at 2000)
Absent or Retired:
Charles / Zan, Spermling of Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 4169 (Level up at 7000)
Sarah / Mana, Level 4 Specialist (Thief): 13447 (Level up at 24000)
Jim / Jim's Fighter, Level 1 Fighter: 241 (Level up at 2000)
Louis / Louis' Next Character, Level 1 ???: 2062 (Level up at ???)
Oliver R / Osar, Level 2 Specialist (Dabbler): 661 (Level up at 3000)

Charlie / Le Chaz III, Level 1 Cleric: 670 (Level up at 1750)
David / Theras, Level 5 Specialist (Assassin): 13422 (Level up at 24000)

Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 5 Halfling: 28949 (Level up at 32000)
Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 19863 (Level up at 36000)
James / Quarion, Level 3 Elf (Gremling): 7947 (Level up at 12000)
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)
Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human