Wednesday, 5 August 2015

Session 56 - The Sleeping Place of the Feathered Swine

This week our heroes entered the doomed and dangerous depths of the Sleeping Place of the Feathered Swine. The swelling cysts hanging from its corpulent flesh are super valuable, but there's also a lost spellbook in the cave and Joe Joe wants to enthrall the Swine itself to become a part of her petting zoo.
Inside there were mutated humans who screamed for help even as they savaged the dead, covered with monstrous growths and filled with horrible white worms and stinking pus and oozing lymph.
Despite all that, probably the most horrifying thing was the discovery that Portuguese children wear their own teeth as jewellery. Thanks, Mariana.

For all - We were forced out of the usual spot! Sounds like I'd better turn up before 6:00 from now on to grab my place. We'll still start 6:30-7:00ish, but feel free to come earlier to keep me company!
If you don't see me/us in the main room in future, we were in the comfy sofa area this time. That's the backup from now on!

For Ollie/Lulu - I am attaching a picture of your missing business thingy for Clunge Honey. It was in another folder! Whoops! I've already applied the extra value for your business, and after the big surge in sales I think this Clunge Wagon is really going to get off the ground!

For Kyle/John Doe the Unlucky - I forgot to get you to level up! Sorry! You'll get 1d10 more health, and here's a link to the Lorebond document so you can pick a dwarf upgrade.
The document says it's every three levels, but I've changed it so you get your first one at level 3 and then every two levels thereafter. So like levels 3, 5, 7, 9, etc etc. Mainly because it takes ages to level up as you gain experience.
As I said last week, the idea is that you have to do something related to the ability to unlock it (I'll tell you after you've chosen!) and binds you with an unbreakable taboo like what is in myffs and legends innit.

For all - New rules thing because Dominic/Stabbington did it and it seems like a cool rule - you can use your action to help out a buddy in combat now. Instead of attacking you give your attack bonus to them because you're flanking and distracting the bad guy and stuff.
In a similar vein, I'm going to use this thing from D&D 5 where you have to use your action to Disengage to run away, everyone you're in combat with gets a free attack if you don't. Elegant!

Stabbington Shanks has incorporated a business under the Tomb Busters brand. Headquarters are in Fortress City Fate. Presumably this is a growing area of the economy what with all the necromancy in the south.
Joe Joe has hired some Halflings (and a normal woman) to create a Josephine's Petting Zoo, a travelling animal show with a variety of surprisingly tame dangerous beasts available to pat. She's determined to capture weird and wonderful animals to add to the business.

Session 56 - The Sleeping Place of the Feathered Swine

Campaign date:
Monday, 1 October, 1549
Moon phase: Waning Gibbous
Zodiac: Virgo
God: Eris

New Characters:
Davrak, a Dentist with a sack of teeth, a hammer, and a penchant for magic. Mostly 'armless.

Enemies defeated:
- 4 mewling cancer-people overgrown with pulsing growths and worm-filled cysts. (100 exp)
Total: 100 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- 126 sp (126 exp)
- A large pearlescent orb covered with tiny holes. Small translucent crabs scuttle over and inside it. (3000 exp)
Total: 3126 exp

- First party to enter the Sleeping Place of the Feathered Swine. (100 exp)
- 5 cavernous areas explored (100 exp)
Total: 200 exp

- Realised selling stuff looted from the village's graveyard in the same village would be pretty suspect. John Doe borrows a cart and mule from his nearby mining business. Joe Joe buys a donkey. Party heads out with loot in tow. (50 exp)
- When passing through a narrow mountain pass, met a scared wizard near a scrubby tree. (50 exp)
- Wizard tells party that he's the only survivor of an attempt to harvest the cysts of a Feathered Swine in a cave nearby. Davrak swaps the wizard's hat for his own but the wizard is fine with that. (50 exp)
- The cave is entered. It is moist and stanky. Party squeeze along a narrow passage. (50 exp)
- A cancerous looking mutant leg is inspected and the sounds of someone trying to keep quiet while breathing heavily in a crevice above are ignored. (50 exp)
- Main passage rejoined, climbed, sounds of sloppy eating heard ahead (50 exp)
- Joe Joe attempts to talk to hideously fleshy lumpen once-human creatures. They scream at her to help them as they scamper forwards. (50 exp)
- Combat is joined. New guy Davrak launches a Light spell while Joe Joe begins mind-controlling the enemies and making them fight each other. Every time they're hit they squirt white frothy worm-filled pus from their pores, but John Doe's flaming sword is actually super good at cauterising the wounds. (50 exp)
- Davrak's arm is splashed with some of the wormy pus and his flesh begins to boil and grow. John Doe acts quickly and slices it straight off. The rapidly expanding lump of flesh drops to the floor. Welcome to my campaign buddy ah ha ha ha. (50 exp)
- Joe Joe sees a strange glowing pearl in nearby pool, sends her surviving mind-slave to retrieve it. The white worms flow from the creature's sores into the water, growing moist and fat, but the slave grabs the pearl out no problem. (50 exp)
- Loot and partially consumed bodies are seen and not touched because they're covered in icky stuff. (50 exp)
- The next chamber is entered, several large holes are in the walls. The holes are inspected, much is ignored in case it's dangerous but some silver pieces are scooped up from the tattered remnants of someone's stuff. (50 exp)
- Joe Joe tries to crawl in another to inspect it and is nearly grabbed by another one of the cancery people. She's pulled out swiftly by chain around her waist and is not pursued out of the hole. (50 exp)
- Sounds of vomiting can be heard from the next chamber, party nope out (it's late) and backtrack out of the cave. (50 exp)
Total: 700 exp

- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous Pus bonus (50 exp)
- Monster Infighting bonus (50 exp)
- Mind Control to Major Tom bonus (50 exp)
- Amputation bonus (100 exp - Davrak)
Total: 250 exp + bonus

Quests and Rumours:
- "The Archbishop of Fate has condemned the Holy Tripartite as heathens and heretics."
- "There's been two girls and some sort of bow legged dwarf man in the area. They've been asking after people… people like you."
- "Did you hear? The King is an Unorthodox now, the fucking filth. Mark my words, the demons are coming for him. That's why the country's going to shit."
- "There's no gold up in Carrowmore, so don't bother. My brother went up and said it's all fool's gold and sorrow."
- "There have been stories from Mustom of alien beings living in the woods. Maniacs!"

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Davrak, arm chopped off in time to save him from a fate worse than death.

Exp Totals:
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 3 Fighter: 6457 (Level up at 8000)
Kyle / John Doe the Unlucky, Level 3 Dwarf: 5676 (Level up at 8800)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 3 Halfling: 4445 (Level up at 8000)
*DING!* +1d6 HP +1 to Domination attempts!
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)


Absent or Retired:
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 4 Barbarian: 8779 (Level up at 16000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2276 (Level up at 4400)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 3553 (Level up at 7000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Dana / Bingo, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 1461(Level up at 2250)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

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