Monday, 24 July 2017

Session 145 - The Lake That Claimed Rake

A great tragedy this week!
The death of Rake, and the loss of Castigate Pox. The joint leaders of Moondin lost to the nixies. Alas!

The power vacuum is filled, for now, by Grand Vizier Blue Jon. He has called a week of mourning and weed legalisation in response, hoping to buy time for a new plan (and ruler!) to be instated.

And, of course, the Heart of Thorns has been raided in an attempt to find Baba Yaga's broom. With this last piece, the tentacle might be chained forever. 

It's Henry's last session next week before he heads to China, so let's hope it's a good one!

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Tom renders the last moments of Rake's life
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I doodle the last time anyone saw Rake

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- Charles illustrates the recap in his signature style

Session 145 - The Lake That Claimed Rake

Campaign Date:
Tuesday, 17 July, 1660
Moon Phase: Waxing Crescent
Zodiac: Gemini

New Backstory:
- During a cold cold winter, Carrie gave what little extra clothing she had... to those who gave her respect (While taking a break to heal, can grant your healing to another instead)
- Raaf saw the horrors of war first-hand when his unit's planned attack was caught in heavy crossfire due to the actions of a lazy commander. Raaf lost trust in the command as a result. (+2 to AC and Saves for a 10 minute turn after a plan goes awry)

Enemies Defeated:- 2 tentacles (40 exp)
Total: 40 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- Baba Yaga's Mortar
- 4000sp (4000 exp)
- Saphire-set silver necklace (2800 exp)
Total: 6800 exp

Exploration:- First party to reach the Nixie Pool (300 exp)- First party to enter the Heart of Thorns (300 exp)
- Explored several dungeon areas (60 exp)
- 24 miles of travel (80 exp)
Total: 740 exp

- Gearing up for a struggle, the party spend some moolah to sleep in Splendid conditions! Such luxury! (50 exp)
- On the way, Rake and Castigate have a chat. We discover that the Dead Peace was negotiated by an ambassador called Singular Thay, and that Castigate knows the Fated Queen's true name. (50 exp)
- Her name... was Jade. (50 exp)
- Shock and disbelief around the table! But how!? Regardless, the troupe sets off towards the nixie pool and the second item in Blue Jon's fetch quest. (50 exp)
- They ride and/or trudge through the forest, taking a detour towards the Alabaster Oracle's home cave. Her reading of Blue Jon's future has changed! How bizarre! (50 exp)
- She also gives the party better directions to the nixie lake. Blue Jon's map was fairly accurate, but may have gotten them lost. On thw way, a leaf-shaped arrow is found. (50 exp)
- After following the road then turning off to follow a stream, by late morning the party find themselves at a mist-shrouded lake! (50 exp)
- When they stop, faint sounds of splashing and tinkling laughter and horse whinnies can be heard. Surely it's the nixies! (50 exp)
- Meta-knowledge is compared by those who checked wikipedia. The verdict - nobody's sure what nixies do because they've got a lot of contradictory fairytale bullshit going on. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD and Nix begin building a raft from rope and wood. (50 exp)
- Blue Jon calls out across the water... and soon a beautiful white horse steps out of the mist and onto the land. It whinnies and motions with its head. (50 exp)
- "Oh it's definitely a kelpie, don't ride it!", says POWER!KITTY. Her warning is immediately ignored in order to debate more important stuff, such as "it can't be a kelpie, we've seen kelpies and they were kelp ladies" (50 exp)
- Instead of getting on the totally-not-kelpie-just-a-beautiful-intelligent-horse-that-lives-in-a-lake, Rake gets on his horse and follows it into the water with a rope about his waist. (50 exp)
--- On the Shore
- The party on the shore lose sight of him in the mist, and soon after the rope goes taut! POWERLAD and Nix run to keep hold. (50 exp)
- Soon there is frantic tugging on the rope, and maybe faintly some talking. There is a loud splash and some great pressure begins pulling the rope inexorably. (50 exp)
- The party haul on it. Their feet slip in the mud, but they grit their teeth and stand firm! (50 exp)
- Blue Jon lets go of the rope and casts Fly, swooping out to investigate what's going on! He follows the direction of the rope, seeing a roiling mass of bubbles with a faint glow deep below. (50 exp)
- The pressure on the rope keeps building and eventually it's too much, the rope slips, and the group fall down in a big tangle. Rake's horse, panicked, emerges from the water and has to be calmed down. The end of the rope slithers into the water. Rake is just... gone. (50 exp)
- Blue Jon, from the air, sees several feminine shapes in the water. He hears a bright voice call out for him to fly down and join them. (50 exp)
- He refuses to fly down, but he does bare his loins to the general jeers of the watery women below. Embarrassed, he swoops up to detect the magical mortar he's after. (50 exp)
- It's there! In the middle of the lake! He spell-swaps a Floating Disk underneath it, to the chagrin of the women lounging in it. (50 exp)
- They attempt some sort of watery mind-magic but Blue Jon's too high to care. He flies back to the main group, Floating Disk skipping like a stone over the water beneath him. (50 exp)
- The nixies bail when they realise they have no power of the stoner mind, and hen Blue Jon arrives it's discovered that the nixies were keeping a bunch of treasure in there! (50 exp)
- Sadly, the group heads back towards Moondin. One day, perhaps, they'll dredge the lake for Castirake's corpse. But that day is not this day. (50 exp)
--- Beneath the Surface
- Rake and his horse follow the not-kelpie into the lake until they reach the end of the rope. Not wanting to go further, he pats the not-kelpie to tell it that he's turning around. (50 exp) 
- His hand gets stuck. The water horse turns its head right around and bares its teeth in an equine grin, staring right at him. (50 exp)
- The water ripples and a face forms, looking like it's carved from glass before the water drips back and reveals a woman's head. "You look a little stuck!" she giggles. (50 exp)
- Rake tugs on the rope for help. His horse panics. The definitely-kelpie drops like a stone, pulling Rake off his horse and into the lake. (50 exp)
- In his ear, Castigate says "Activating air!" and charges an air rune! Unfortunately it's more like a hairdryer of fresh air blasting into Rake's mouth, but it's better than nothing. (50 exp)
- Unnoticed and unthought of, Diocletian the baby basilisk drowns under Rake's armour. (50 exp)
- Beneath the water they all have invisible woman-style transparent bodies. At a distance, the shadow of a great fish circles. (50 exp)
- Rake can't talk to the kelpies since he's got the air blowing straight into his mouth and he feels a cool touch on his wang. (50 exp)
- As Charles writes in the recap, 🍆✋👄💯🐠💦(50 exp)
- The horse and the kelpies continue dragging him down... but his friends holding the other end of the rope are holding on tight! Rather than sinking straight down, he arcs like a pendulum at the end of the rope. (50 exp)
- One whispers in his ear that she's untying the rope. There's not much he can do to stop her. (50 exp)
- The rope goes limp around Rake's waist. He's alone. At least he can spool the rope in. He attaches a grapnel and tries to throw it at the fish... no chance underwater (50 exp)
- With his other hand he swings Castigate the greataxe at the definitely-maybe-kelpie, doing no damage due to the water slowing the blow. (50 exp)
- The kelpies form line in front of Rake's face, the line of refracting images creating a single perfect face and speaking in perfect unison - "Turn off the air, Rake". (50 exp)
- He doesn't! Instead he throws the grapnel-rope in front of himself, Castigate prepares a ghost blast, and together they blast the grapnel at the fish!!! (50 exp)
- It misses. (50 exp)
- Rake resigns himself to having to fuck his way out of this predicament, and grabs at the waist of the nearest kelpie. His finges go right through her body. She laughs lightly. "You know we weren't actually going to fuck you, right? We're going to eat your soul!" (50 exp)
- Rake finally realises that they actually didn't want to have sex after all!! What a twist? (50 exp)
- He's reached the bottom and out of options. Castigate's exhausted. The nixies line up again... and the Charm works. "Stay with us, Rake", they say. And he does. (50 exp)
- He unbuckles Castigate and allows the armour to fall to the treasure-strewn lake bottom. He breathes the dark clear water into his lungs. His last thought is of his long-lost daughter, and how he wishes he'd given her a better future... (50 exp)
--- The Way Home
- Without Rake, the party heads home with a sad song in their hearts. The mortar, filled with treasure, floats an inch above the ground and is easily pushed. (50 exp)
- On the way past the Alabaster Oracle they drop off the mortar so that she can look after it for them. (50 exp)
- They come into Moondin in the early evening, and rumours of Rake's fate begin to spread. Before they get too out of control, the Grand Vizier Blue Jon makes a public announcement. (50 exp)
- He confirms the demise of Rake Hacker, declares a week of mourning for the fallen Steward, names Raaf van Held as the city's new interim Steward, and finally announces - weed is now legal!!! (50 exp)
- A bit of admin and a few days rest, then the group gear up for their assault on the Heart of Thorns and the final item! Hurrah! (50 exp)
- On the way, they go to check in with the Oracle... but it seems a couple of big ol' tentacles are bashing at her door! They're distracted though, so easily dispatched with a cavalry charge. (50 exp)
- Turns out that the Oracle's home started getting attacked soon after Blue Jon dropped off the mortar. Curious. (50 exp)
- Raaf sends some of the city guard to help protect the Oracle's caves, and she gives Blue Jon another reading and sees... he will die after the Heart of Thorns?! (50 exp)
- Zena tries to get a prophecy but is told that SHE WILL DIE should she return to this place!!! (50 exp)
- On the way to the Heart of Thorns, another leaf-shaped arrow is found. Different leaf, different veins, but similarly leaf-like. (50 exp)
- After some time they reach the Heart of Thorns - a big pile of detritus and thorny bushes. An obvious entrance is formed at a place where the hill has collapsed... or perhaps blown open. (50 exp)
- The party charge their anti-mould runes, get torches ready and smoke some infravision-granting Red Eye Cigarettes before heading in. (50 exp)
- As they enter, it is obvious that the whole hill is made of many many dead and mould-infested creatures, built up over the long long years into a huge mound. (50 exp)
- The tear in the side of the mound oozes viscous liquid, pulsing slowly, trying to heal. Several conveniently dungeon-corridor-sized channels have formed due to collapses of the internal structure (50 exp)
- There is a sound of voices playing card games from one of several corridors, purplish vegetation in another. The possible options are investigated before the party withdraws. Next session, the interior! (50 exp)
Total: 2950 exp

- Best of Intentions 
 bonus (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Death bonus (50 exp)
- Fame bonus (50 exp)
- High as Fuck bonus (50 exp)
- I Immediately Regret This Decision bonus (50 exp)
- Leave a Man Behind bonus (50 exp)
- Noblebright bonus (50 exp)
- Politico bonus (50 exp)
- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)
- Why Did You Touch That bonus (50 exp)
Total: 650 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer 
(Charles / Zena - 100 exp)
- Caller (Tom / ??? - 100 exp)
- Mapper (Fraser / Nix - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (James / Raaf - 100 exp)
- Quartermaster 
(Henry / Blue Jon - 100 exp)
- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)

- Tracker 
(Henry / Blue Jon - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Tom, Charles - 100 exp)
- Artapalooza bonus (Charles - 100 exp)
- Lonely Death bonus (Tom - 500 exp)

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Rake Hacker, dragged to the bottom of a lake by nixies where he eventually drowned.
Exp Totals:
- Fraser / Nix Neckbiter, Level 5 Barbarian: 30598 (Level up at 32000)
- Tom / Rake Hacker, 
Level 5 Fighter: 29813 (Level up at 32000)*DECEASED*
- Henry / 
Blue Jon Goujon, Level 5 Magic-User: 28404 (Level up at 36000)
- Kitty / POWERLAD!, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 27333 (Level up at 36000)
- Charles / Zena, Level 5 Fighter: 23968 (Level up at 32000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14135 (Level up at 16000)
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, 
Level 4 Cleric: 13800 (Level up at 14000)- Tom / Tom's next character: +2298 exp (+14907 exp if child of Rake = 17205 exp)

Absent or Retired:- Eglė / Bob, Level 1 Dwarf: 434 (Level up at 2200)
- Ollie / Ollie's next character: +300 exp
- Ollie / Andromeda Spiderbite, 
Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 17372 (Level up at 18000)
Will / Cecil Fulbright, Level 5 Cleric (Termaxian): 15063 (Level up at 28000)
- Tom / Insanity Mammoth, Level 3 Barbarian: 5192 (Level up at 8000)
- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)

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