Monday 2 July 2018

Session 187 - Solvent Abuse

A very exploratory session! The ruined town of Muntberg was looted, Dwimmermount was entered... and most importantly SCIENCE!! was used to work out how to use raw Azoth to craft both ultimate glue AND ultimate acid! Crazy!

Please find attached both Styx's diary and research notes. SCIENCE!!!

Also from afar, Charles sends his regards.


- Zena marks Dumbledorris' blobby forehead



- Extremely accurate rendition of Ereshkigal



Session 187 - Solvent Abuse


Campaign Date:
Friday, 20 April, 1601
Moon Phase: First Quarter
Zodiac: Aries


Treasure and Equipment:
- 280 gp (14000 exp)
- several tents
- much much rope
- empty boxes and barrels
- 57 iron rations
- mountaineering supplies (inc. iron spikes, hammers, more rope)
- several suits of armour, mostly goblin-sized
- a cart, added onto the Guber to create a double-decker
- nearly a gallon of raw Azoth (20000 exp)
- Vial of ultimate acid
- Vial of ultimate glue
- 2 angel corpses
- 1 prosthetic arm
- 3 "unmarked packages" contents to be decided retroactively
- Some nice dresses, bras, and bolts of expensive cloth (4000 exp)
Total: 38000 exp


Enemies Defeated:
-
Total: 0 exp


Exploration:
- A few miles of travel (40 exp)
Total: 40 exp


Events:
--- Synthia sets up shop
- The day dawns on the small campsite outside of Crantock. Synthia looks at the grimoire she took from that kid she ate - it’s nearly faded away completely! (50 exp)
- She runs off into the village, asking uninterested villagers who to talk to in the nearby monastery. They wave her on, and it turns out nobody really cares if she hits up the monastic library anyway. (50 exp)
- There aren’t many monks here and the monastery is in a general state of disrepair. The only thing that’s really been maintained is the library! How convenient! Synthia decides to spend the week here copying Return to Mother into a new grimoire. (50 exp)
- Back at the camp, Styx has been busy altering Synthia’s plate armour to fit her child-sized body. It works! (50 exp)
- As POWERLAD, Andromeda, Styx, and the goblins prepare to move off in the Guber, an old acquaintance arrives! It’s Flaming Fury, the Dwarf woman with flame-red hair last seen around Dunnsmouth! (50 exp)
- She tells POWERLAD and Andromeda that she left Ereshkigal’s drakencult some time ago and has been travelling around the land performing magic tricks with another alternate timeline Flaming Fury. Unfortunately, that one died in an unfortunate magic accident. She’s pretty sure that she’s the real one though. (50 exp)
--- The Road to Muntburg
- They help Flaming Fury onto the Guber and set off! It’s good travelling weather and the roads are better here. Dwimmermount is visible in the distance, light reflecting off the angel platform that’s landed on the peak. To the northeast, the Black Sun bleeds. (50 exp)
- They notice some broken crossbow bolts amongst bloodstains on the way. One of the goblins tastes the blood - human! Tracks lead off into the scrub, but are ignored. (50 exp)
- It’s only a short Guber ride to Muntberg. Angel-capped Dwimmermount looms above the deserted town. Styx and Flaming Fury park up and investigate, leaving POWERLAD and Andromeda behind in case there’s still an angel presence inside. (50 exp)



--- Fallen Muntberg
- The pair pick their way through the town. It was a quick, savage strike. Piles of red-veined mud mark where demons fell and the human corpses have mostly rotted away to skeletons. It’s quiet here.(50 exp)
- The town is also pierced by the stasis beams from the sky. They shimmer like a heat haze, some containing people frozen mid-motion. Anybody frozen in a stasis beam has an incision at their heart and their throat. (50 exp)
- Turning a corner, Styx sees a large man-high brass sphere - an angel! It’s just lying there, quiescent. He gets close enough to hear a faint fluting hum coming from it, but doesn’t touch it. Good thing they left the others outside! (50 exp)
- It looks like they’ve pretty much got the whole town to themselves so long as they don’t mess with the angels! Flaming Fury looks around for the bank while Styx pops into a grocery store to get supplies. (50 exp)
- Styx gets a few bits together, including a fair amount of wine and carries it out towards the Guber. He leaves it with POWERLAD and Andromeda, telling them to have a picnic and giving Andromeda a covert thumbs up. She grins. (50 exp)
- He heads back into town, finding Flaming Fury at the bank trying to work out how to cut her way in with runes. Somehow she missed that the front door is wide open and the inside is full of dead bodies. (50 exp)
- They go behind the desk and find the collapsed mud-corpse of a greed demon. He’s got a gold mask and keys, which they use to unlock the vault. Payday baby! (50 exp)
- One of Styx’s goblins drags the pile of gold coins out to the Guber while the two-person team finish up looting the town, grabbing climbing gear, as many iron rations as they can find, some barrels lined for azoth carting duties, and some maps of the Barrowmaze that might be useful one day. (50 exp)
- Also, armour for all who want it! Also, the world’s first underwire bra! Andromeda is appreciative of this latter garment. (50 exp)
- The Guber gets upgraded to a precarious double-decker to carry all this new loot. It’s low on the ground due to all the extra weight, but otherwise working fine! (50 exp)
- All set for Dwimmermount, the heavily laden Guber drives off towards the great mountain. (50 exp)



--- Creeps and corvids
- POWERLAD scouts from the skies, once again seeing that Dwimmermount is defended by anti-air stasis beams fired by the angels below. This time they seem to be catching crows in the beams though. (50 exp)
- The front entrance is guarded by one of the big boss angels. POWERLAD flies back down and fills the others in on the number one tip for fighting angels - aim for the little ones first. (50 exp)
- They keep rolling around to the Dwarf Door, seeing as they’ve got a Dwarf now and all. Plus Randy’s around here somewhere. On the way, several ravens descend and land on the Guber near POWERLAD! (50 exp)
- They squawk loudly until the cacophony somehow combines into a screeching voice, it’s Cardinal Scream! Or at least, part of him. (50 exp)
- He tells POWERLAD that the Rebel Dead are trying their best to defend the Barrowmaze from Praetor-Pontifex Cyrus, but they’re being beaten back. Intelligence suggests that POWERLAD killed one of “the twins” and “now they’re mad, watch your back”. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD protests that he hasn’t killed anyone lately, but Cardinal Scream says that’s just what he’s heard. The ravens shut up and fly off. (50 exp)
- Further on towards the back of the mountain, there is a rumbling from above! It’s Randy, rolling down the hill at a rapid pace. He saw them coming! (50 exp)
- He greets everyone and is immediately a creep to Flaming Fury. Only one in a thousand or so Dwarfs is a female, donchaknow, and he reeeaaally doesn’t know how to speak to Dwarf women. He offers an unsolicited dwarven dick pic (a sculpture) and is baffled when she does not respond positively. (50 exp)
- "He delved too greedily and too deep... into Reddit" - Kitty (50 exp)
- He also offers an angel-armoured arm he’s been working on with Gav! Or at least, he was working on it with Gav. Gav unfortunately died. This isn’t Gav’s arm, oh no, certainly not. Gav died protecting Randy from an angel or something. Yea, yea. An angel. (50 exp)
- Nevertheless, Styx takes the arm. His Marduk-worshipping goblin would benefit from replacing a limb with this strange new technology, so it’s perfect! Flaming Fury offers to amputate the arm with her axe. (50 exp)
- Grinning, she cleaves straight at the wrong arm! Styx has to make a last minute leap to block the blow. What the hell!? Flaming Fury is laughing her redheaded head off. She is no longer welcome on the Guber. (50 exp)
- Angrily, Styx does it himself. Bones has a metal arm! It’s got some sort of clear gem in the palm, usage unclear. (50 exp)
--- Finally, a delve!
- Randy leads the group into Dwimmermount through the Dwarf Door which, as we know, only appears when a Dwarf is standing in front of it. It seems the angels don’t know about this way in since it’s unguarded. (50 exp)
- Inside, down some stairs, is the cave Randy’s been staying in. The way deeper into the dungeon is blocked off by a whole lot of rubble. There’s a bed for Gav, unoccupied, and Randy’s bed slab is surrounded by crudely carved dick pic sculptures. (50 exp)
- Flaming Fury tries to bait Randy into suicide and discovers that he’s already tried that. Unfortunately his neck was too brawny for the noose. Flaming Fury suggests she pull his legs next time he tries. (50 exp)
- He’s surprisingly into this, but after they set up the noose POWERLAD intervenes. POWERLAD blames himself for Gav’s death, he should never have left him with the inclusion-hating Randy. (50 exp)
- They get set for the actual delve, pulling aside the rubble blocking the way and firing up lights and lanterns. The plan - head to the elevator doors and unlock them with the remote control thing they found in Arach-Nacha’s (RIP) lair (50 exp)
- Following confusing maps inherited from the long-vanished Mori, they head in. The Moon Pool is dark now, the shaft coming down from above having been blocked by one of the great angel’s wing-petals. (50 exp)
- Styx fills a barrel with the moon water regardless. Taking a sip he feels a tingle but little else. (50 exp)
- Also in this room - dead giant spiders and the remains of an angel. Styx cracks open the spherical core and looks inside - nothing. He gets his Marduk-worshipping goblin Bones to look inside with his Artifice Vision and… wooooah. (50 exp)
- Inside the angel, invisible to normal sight, are intricate four-dimensional cogs and gears and flywheels. They glow bright blue in Bones’ vision, filling the entirety of the innards of the angel. (50 exp)
- They roll the angel’s body out of the dungeon so that Bones can attempt to carve a model, so others can understand what he sees within. (50 exp)
- Angels can be heard singing as they do this. Hopefully just a coincidence… (50 exp)
- The party go back in, heading through several rooms that contain the stone bodies of dead Inclusions, crispy dead giant spiders, and the occasional brass sphere of a destroyed angel. (50 exp)
- Styx chats to Randy about Dwarf culture. Randy’s dad carved him, see. The various Dwarven arcologies have their own means of getting around the scarcity of dwarf women, and in Ur-Kalladh they carve their sons from stone. (50 exp)
- They come across a statue of the Lady whose outstretched hands hold many gold coins. POWERLAD and Flaming Fury toss in a gold coin each and receive her blessing. Styx’s paltry silver nets him nothing. (50 exp)
- The next room contains a shallow puddle of black Azoth leaking from a crack in the wall! It’s refilled after all these months away! (50 exp)
- An angel’s body steams where it touches the Azoth. POWERLAD stone-shapes the ground to collect the liquid into a stone bucket. A whole gallon! How wonderful! (50 exp)
- Styx notes that it’s similar in consistency to the black gunk that drips from the cracked Black Sun. Similar but distinct. (50 exp)
--- Science, bitch
- It’s time to SCIENCE! Good thing that Styx brought this barrel of Lethe water! Experimentation begins! POWERLAD glyphbends crystal into a meth lab. (50 exp)
- Azoth combined with waters of the river Lethe creates a viscous blood-like substance. (50 exp)
- When heated, this blood-like substance boils off into an acidic silvery gas and leaves behind a reddish dust. (50 exp)
- Catching and condensing the gas forms a clear sparkling liquid. When given to Randy to test, it sears straight through his mouth and tongue and clear through his body, which sizzles and eats down into the floor. Nice. (50 exp)
- Combining the red residue with blood (supplied from Randy’s still-warm corpse) it becomes an off-white viscous glue. A glue so powerful that when Randy’s finger is dipped into it and thrown at a wall, it can’t be removed except by cutting. (50 exp)
- Azoth and water forms a gloopy red substance, but when heated the water boils off and leaves the black Azoth behind. (50 exp)
- Dripping Lethe water onto demon corpse clay seems to reanimate it somewhat, making it writher and slop around a bit. (50 exp)
- Science achieved, they head up to the surface! It appears that Styx and co have worked out how to create not only the ultimate acid, but also the ultimate glue! (50 exp)
- One last experiment - testing the solvent on the invisible cogs inside an angel. No effect. (50 exp)
- Counting this as a successful delve, despite not having found the elevator door, the party rests up. With a single casualty in Randy who wanted to die anyway, they’ve done a good job! (50 exp)
Total: 4100 exp

Misc:
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Henchman Abuse bonus (50 exp)
- Internecine Strife bonus (50 exp)
- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous Gore bonus (50 exp)
- Mad Inventor bonus (50 exp)
- Mountaineer bonus (50 exp)
- Operator as Fuck bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)
Total: 550 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer (Carter / Styx - 100 exp)
- Caller (Ollie / Flaming Fury - 100 exp)
- Mapper (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (Carter / Styx - 100 exp)
- Quartermaster (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Tracker (Ollie / Flaming Fury)
- Chippo Man bonus (Ollie*2 - 100 exp ea.)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Ollie - 500 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Charles - 100 exp) - Fiction Fanatic bonus (Carter - 100 exp) - Fiction Fantastic bonus (Carter - 100 exp)
Active Businesses:
- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1020sp. (Ratimir)
- Blood Honey Healing 4 U (Co-dependent businesses)
--- Honey Healing. Safe. 1084sp. (Bertha)
--- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 10410sp. (Sir Robyn)

Rumours:
-

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Randy, drank the ultimate acid and got dissolved to hell.

Exp Totals:
- Kitty / High Priest POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 119658 (Level up at 144000)
-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 10 (-50% exp)
--- Andromeda, Level 3 Muscle Wizard: 7891 (Level up at 9000)
*DING!* +1d4 HP! +1 level 2 spell/day! +free spell! +backstory!
---- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 6 (-30% exp) ---- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 2 (-10% exp)
--- Randy, Level 4 Hench-Dwarf: 9884 (Level up at 17600)
*DECEASED*
- Carter / Styx, Level 6 Goblin: 47722 (Level up at 64000)
--- Styx's minions, Level 0 Goblin Buddies
- Ollie / Flaming Fury, Level 4 Dwarf: 15291 (Level up at 17600)
*DING!* +1d10 HP! +backstory!
*DING!* +1d10 HP! +saves improve! +optional lorebond! +backstory!
---- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 3 (-15% exp)

Absent or Retired:
- Ollie / Synthia, Level 5 Inheritor: 24639 (Level up at 36000)
-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 2 (-10% exp)
- Suzanne / Dumbledorris2, Level 3 Inheritor: 6549 (Level up at 9000)
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 6 Termaxian Cleric: 52811 (Level up at 56000)
--- 4 Henchmen Undeserving of Names, Level 0 Bootlickers
- Charles / Zena, Level 6 Fighter: 46042 (Level up at 64000)
- James / Ratimir, Level 6 Ratman: 31216 (Level up at 48000)
- Timothy / Spider Squad, Level 4 Spider Extras: 7366 (Level up at 12000)
- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 6 Magic-User: 60599 (Level up at 72000)
- Elias / Raivo, Level 1 Barbarian: 938 (Level up at 2000)
- Tom / Hacker's Halberdiers, Level 3 Extras: 5598 (Level up at 6000)
- Andrea / Marjorie, Level 1 Halfling: 1111 (Level up at 2000)
- Fraser / Mori, Level 5 Elf (Worriganger): 24025 (Level up at 48000)
- Issy / Sturdy, Level 2 Dwarf: 3596 (Level up at 4400)   
- Tom / Clarence Eclair, Level 3 Specialist: 3040 (Level up at 6000)
- Tom / Aces Fontaine, Level 1 Specialist: 869 (Level up at 1500)
- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)
- Imran / Friar, Level 1 Magic User: 1040 (Level up at 2250)
- Yuri / Bjorn Gunnerson, Level 2 Barbarian: 2278 (Level up at 4000)
- Sunni / Larry's Legends, Level 1 Extras: 758 (Level up at 1500)
- Fraser / Tippin, Level 1 Ratman: 1458 (Level up at 1500)
- Tom / Meteor Power Shower, Level 2 Barbarian: 3061 (Level up at 4000)
- Nix's Retainer
--- Huz, Level 0 Hireling
- Tom / Spicy Mac, Level 2 Halfling: 3457 (Level up at 4000)
- Eleanor / Mugg, Level 2 Fighter: 2357 (Level up at 4000)
- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Amar / Amar's Cleric, Level 1 Cleric: 1413 (Level up at 1750)
- Henry / Henry's Next Character: +2084 exp
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)
- Eglė / Bob, Level 1 Dwarf: 434 (Level up at 2200)
- Will / Cecil Fulbright, Level 5 Cleric (Termaxian): 15063 (Level up at 28000)
- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)

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