Tuesday 14 August 2018

Session 193 - Rat-Slime Soup for the Soul

Hey what? We got to use the cooking system this session! I’m digging it so far, mostly because it resulted in people standing around waiting for random encounters so they could be killed and eaten. Amazing.
Hopefully Zena gets better at making that “Ratsudon” made from green slime and rat chunks, for now it's just a slightly better meal than the default.

Also used for the first time this session - Ordainment! The add-on religion mechanic precipitated by Carter and/or Styx’s insistence that there should be some reward for the faithful even when there’s no Cleric around.
Put simply - Clerics can give sermons to give you a long-term religion perk. If they Bless you on a Sunday you can give sermons too!
The main downside - you lose your perks if you use magic. Dun dun duuuuuun.

POWERLAD brings Andromeda closer to the dragon Zena begins her cooking career
Styx makes a robot suit The Witchfinder-Sergeant offends a god


- Carter shows Styx opening up to his new friends

Session 193 - Rat-Slime Soup for the Soul

Campaign Date:
Sunday, 29 April, 1601
Moon Phase: Waxing Gibbous
Zodiac: Aries

New Backstory:
- The Witchfinder-Sergeant is a member of the now-underground secret society of Witchfinders. (Once per session, can find a society contact in a city)

- When the Witchfinder-Sergeant was destitute he was forced to turn to a life of petty crime, stealing bread to feed himself and continue on Gods’ holy path. That he hanged his own mother and sister for the same crime is irrelevant - they merely did it to survive, he had to do it to continue on his heavenly journey!! (+1 dexterity score)


Treasure and Equipment:
- Rat cutlets
- Slime soup base
- Friendship!
- 8 sp, 2cp (9 exp)
- Iron manacles
- Local Key #92
Total: 9 exp

Enemies Defeated:
- Green slime (50 exp)
- 13 robo-rats (65 exp)
- 3 frog monsters (150 exp)
Total: 265 exp

Exploration:
- 3 random encounters (150 exp)
Total: 150 exp

Events:
--- Conference call to God
- We open with Zena talking to Vorn through the communication device, with Styx watching on in avid curiosity. He shows them a rough cut-through diagram of the levels of Dwimmermount. (50 exp)
- She thanks Him for His faith-shattering revelations about Terms Termax and asks to be filled with Vorn’s holy light - but he refuses unless she renounces her Termaxian faith and becomes a Loegrianist. (50 exp)
- After much thought and pleas to let her remain Termaxian to more easily infiltrate the dark Termaxian cult… she relents. Zena is now a Loegrianist, and apostate to the Termaxian faith. (50 exp)



- Styx and Zena recite a prayer to Vorn and she glows for a time with golden light. The Witchfinder-Sergeant looks on impassively. They should know better than to completely trust one of the Gods Between, especially the chaotic neutral Vorn. (50 exp)
- Zena asks about the Slaughtergrids. What were they? Vorn explains that they were great Azoth-powered war machines used by the Halflings to re-dominate mankind in the millenium before the birth of Christ. Exposition! (50 exp)
- He also drops that the Slaughtergrids had on-board Azoth refineries and that He spoke to the dwarf precursor race, the Great Ancients, when He still walked upon the Earth. (50 exp)
- The party attempts to tell him that the Angels in the mountain have gone haywire, but he denies it. They were ordered to defend against all non-Lawful creatures in the mountain, rather than merely seeking and destroying Chaotic creatures, after recent attacks from Neutral beings. The party laughs nervously. (50 exp)
- The Witchfinder-Sergeant has a long and strange conversation with Vorn that nevertheless results in Vorn getting bored and giving him a sermon to unlock his faith ability. (50 exp)
- He keeps pushing for Vorn to also bless his precious holy charcoal scoop… and Vorn melts it to rust with a wave of his hand. (50 exp)
- Since Vorn has started to get suspicious about the Magic-Users in the party, especially that strong blue glowing lad over there, the party hurriedly takes their leave and heads back to the surveillance room. (50 exp)
--- Dwimmermount’s funniest home videos
- Styx shows everyone the gag reel he made of the elevator angel fight, to the chagrin of many. (50 exp)
- He also clicks through all the surveillance screens to see what sort of threats there are around here - fungally reanimated bodies, moving mushrooms, oozes, and motile shrubbery. (50 exp)
- The Witchfinder-Sergeant casts his special spell to Respect the Gods Between, making random encounters more favourable. Appropriate, since Vorn is one of such Gods Between according to Unorthodox doctrine. (50 exp)
--- Back to the base
- They reach the elevator in good time, facing occasional gusts of hayfever-causing pollen that cause itchy eyes and runny noses. (50 exp)
- The lift descends and reaches the first floor of Dwimmermount. Finally, after all this time! Styx grabs some wings from a destroyed angel as the doors open… and the angels behind turn to aim their cannons at the party… (50 exp)
- Styx bravely stands to the fore, radiating Lawful energy, and sings to them. “ -- DIPLOMATIC SOLUTION IN PROGRESS -- “. After a few tense moments… the angels stand down. (50 exp)



- It’s a remarkably safe trip back to the safe room, the Gods Between smile on the party indeed! As soon as they’re in, POWERLAD pulls the stone across the entrance to keep creeping beasts out. (50 exp)
- Zena’s been inspired by the dead Dwarfs’ culinary interest and decides to try out the new cooking subsystem. While everyone else tries to get some sleep, Zena and POWERLAD try to hunt some dinner… (50 exp)
- POWERLAD pulls back the stone enough to let them both out, and they wait for whatever vile fiends roam these corridors. (50 exp)
--- Welcome to flavourtown
- First to appear, at the edge of the torchlight, is a silent creeping lump of green slime that oozes stealthily across the ceiling. Zena sees it though, and leaps upwards to skewer it on her spear! (50 exp)
- It drops down to try and digest her, but she’s ready. As the haft of her spear turns into ooze, she flips it into the large stone bowl POWERLAD has just formed from the flagstones! (50 exp)
- The haft is ruined, but the speartip is fine. POWERLAD morphs the ground to carry the green slime into the room, then makes a new haft from stone. (50 exp)



- Fun fact: Boil Green Slime for long enough and it becomes a good soup base. Really helps with predigesting those proteins. They leave it in the stone pot, covered with a stone lid, and set back out again. (50 exp)
- They wait a while… until the squeaking of rats mixed with the squeaking of metal joints reaches their ears. From the darkness, a ton of mechanical rats! (50 exp)
- Zena strikes one, then another and another and another. In the space of a few seconds the rats are carved into pieces! She’s so fast her armour begins to overheat, but with Vorn’s blessing it remains intact! (50 exp)



- There are a few rats left, and POWERLAD jumps in to show off, smashing the rest even though it means taking a fair few bites from their mechanical jaws. Impressive! (50 exp)
- They take the rats inside and just chuck them straight into the Green Slime to be digested. Saves time butchering them, since the indigestible metal will just sink to the bottom. (50 exp)
- Zena declares that this Green Slime and Rat Meat soup will be heretofore known as Ratsudon! (50 exp)



--- The gang host another dinner party
- POWERLAD declares that he’s pooped, but Zena is insistent that she can get some more delicious dungeon foodstuffs and heads back out. (50 exp)
- After a time, bobbing torches approach. A small party of adventuring types, led by a dark-skinned woman with a scar over one eye. Zena steps forward to greet her, and they shake hands. The woman’s name is Ilda. She gratefully accepts Zena’s invitation to dinner. (50 exp)
- She reveals that she’s got a fair amount of Fire Beetle Spice, and she’ll trade it for food for her and her party. Delicious! Zena gets cooking, getting POWERLAD to make some water for the pot. (50 exp)
- Styx stirs to talk to Ilda. They exchange pleasantries, and she’s not perturbed to speak to a Goblin which is nice. He asks her where Fire Beetle Spice comes from, and she tells him It’s made by toasting Fire Beetle glow-glands. Hot tip. (50 exp)
- Soon the Ratsudon is done! It’s… interesting. Certainly edible, and certainly better than one might expect from a rat and slime soup. Bulked out with some iron rations it’s a fine meal for all. (50 exp)
- The visitors have got their own bedding, so after thanking Zena and POWERLAD for the meal they settle down to sleep (50 exp)
--- New friends
- The next morning, though it’s next to impossible to tell underground, the parties awaken. Andromeda asks POWERLAD to raise her in Ninhursag’s esteem, and so he does. She has reached Bond Level 5 - the Devotion of Ninhursag - and chooses Ninhursag Undivided as her path. She can now convert poison entering her body into any other type! (50 exp)



- Styx and Break’s new-grown Goblins have grown up overnight, and emerge cackling from their earthy flowerbed. Styx gets Break and POWERLAD to grant them the powers of both Ninhursag and Ereshkigal. (50 exp)
- Tinkering further, he puts some cool angel wings on Break’s robot and then uses his inner holy power and Tinkering aptitude to charge up an Angell. It walks! Styx gets his own angel-mech! (50 exp)



- The other adventurers thank the party and turn to leave via the Dwarf Door, but some of their members are persuaded to become henchmen! (50 exp)
- The Witchfinder-Sergeant gets the wiry Muscle Wizard girl to join him because she’s a douchebag and she’ll gladly take a downpayment on her hiring costs. Plus a half-share of loot, naturally. Her name is Erstwhile, and she’s really only out for herself. (50 exp)



- Styx gifts Ilda’s party with rope, a shield, and some human fat candles. They thank him profusely, and offer their friendship and protection if they ever meet in the future. Ilda decides to stay with Styx since he’s proven his generosity, sending her party off to safety. (50 exp)
--- Return to the depths
- It’s another calm walk back to the elevator, thank goodness. On their way down a Ratman falls onto the elevator! The Witchfinder-Sergeant shoots him in the head to put him out of his misery, and Zena loots the body. Ruthless. (50 exp)
- They reach the lower floor and the doors open. The goal is the Azoth floor, so they head the way they’ve always gone. The first door opens to reveal frog monsters trying to recover the bodies of their fallen fellows! (50 exp)
- The frog monsters flee, so the party continues through the room with the glowy smoke sphere. They ignore them and continue on… (50 exp)
- But it’s an ambush! Two of the frog monsters didn’t retreat far! Styx leaps in the way in the angel-bot, resisting blows until one of the frogs kicks him backwards with its powerful legs! (50 exp)
- Styx’s orb goes rolling into the midst of the glowing spheres and they begin to spin, releasing waves of soporific gas! Inside the sphere, Styx is fine. (50 exp)
- Zena and POWERLAD aren’t so lucky though. The gas knocks both of them out, and pulsing strands of smoky energy like a plasma ball flicker out and float them towards the orbs. (50 exp)



- Andromeda resists the gas, but is grabbed by frog monsters! Styx pinballs off the back wall and rolls in at ramming speed, knocking them off her! (50 exp)
- Ilda the Fighter uses the rope Styx gave her as a lasso, snagging POWERLAD from near the orb and pulling him towards her! He awakens, but the gas lingers on him and Ilda herself collapses. (50 exp)
- Zena, for her part, forces herself to wakefulness and charges out of the gas to spear a frog through the gullet! She follows through to hurt the other. (50 exp)
- With POWERLAD and Zena awake, the party make short work of the last frog. Styx punch-daggers out of the eye of the angel, while Erstwhile manages to get the finishing blow on the last frog monster with a headbutt. Phew! (50 exp)
- They loot the bodies, finding some manacles and a key that might open a nearby lock. They’re still feeling pretty well rested, and they’re so close to the stairs to the Azoth-infused upper level. Onwards! To the all-important robot fuel! (50 exp)
Total: 2550 exp

Misc:
- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Antagonist Appeaser bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Breach and Clear bonus (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Diplomancy bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Fame bonus (50 exp)
- Heresy bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous gore bonus (50 exp)
- Masterchef bonus (50 exp)
- Noblebright bonus (50 exp)
- Operator as Fuck bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- Tactical Fighting bonus (50 exp)
Total: 850 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer (Carter / Styx - 100 exp ea)
- Caller (Henry / Witchfinder - 100 exp)
- Mapper (Charles / Zena - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (Charles / Zena - 100 exp)
- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Tracker (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Carter, Charles - 100 exp ea.)
- Artapalooza bonus (Charles - 100 exp) - Attacco d'Arte (Charles - 100 exp)
- Chippo Man bonus (Carter*2, Henry- 100 exp ea.)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Charles, Henry - 500 exp ea.)
Active Businesses:
- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1020sp. (Ratimir)
- Blood Honey Healing 4 U (Co-dependent businesses)
--- Honey Healing. Safe. 1084sp. (Bertha)
--- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 10410sp. (Sir Robyn)

Rumours:
-

Death Toll and Injuries:
- None!

Exp Totals:
- Kitty / High Priest POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 125755 (Level up at 144000)
-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 10 (-50% exp)
--- Andromeda, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 10169 (Level up at 18000)
---- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 5 (-10% exp)
- Charles / Zena, Level 6 Fighter: 57333 (Level up at 64000)
- Carter / Styx, Level 6 Goblin: 54659 (Level up at 64000)
--- Break, Robo-Armoured Goblin Buddy
--- A couple of other goblin buddies
--- Ilda, Level 2 Fighter: 2348 (Level up at 4000)
- Henry / Witchfinder-Sergeant, Level 4 Cleric (Unorthodox): 9650 (Level up at 14000)
--- Erstwhile, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 848 (Level up at 2250)

Absent or Retired:
- Ollie / Flaming Fury, Level 5 Dwarf: 21688 (Level up at 35200)
-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 3 (-15% exp)
- Suzie / Dumbledorris2, Level 4 Inheritor: 12573 (Level up at 18000) 
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 6 Termaxian Cleric: 52811 (Level up at 56000) 
- James / Ratimir, Level 6 Ratman: 33352 (Level up at 48000)
- Ollie / Synthia, Level 5 Inheritor: 24639 (Level up at 36000)
-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 2 (-10% exp)
Carrie's Henchmen
--- 4 Henchmen Undeserving of Names, Level 0 Bootlickers
- Timothy / Spider Squad, Level 4 Spider Extras: 7366 (Level up at 12000)
- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 6 Magic-User: 60599 (Level up at 72000)
- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)
- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)

- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)

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