Sunday 8 October 2017

Session 153 - Mental, Elf, Crisis

What a session!
6 enter, 4 leave, only one conscious.
Brutal stuff! At least there was a fair amount of treasure for the trouble!

I have been remiss in that last week I forgot to put Charles' remembrancy pictures in! I will put them in here, and after Fraser's space dnd recap it is time for me to put images INLINE for dramatic effect!

So without further ado, Charles' doodles from last time, folllowed by recap!

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Session 153 - Mental, Elf, Crisis

Campaign Date:
Monday, 8 October, 1600
Moon Phase: Third Quarter
Zodiac: Virgo

New Characters:
- Borodin, a Cleric who's been out of the adventuring game for over 50 years, back in the game after a wild drunken bender for a special appearance!
- Ratimir, a totally-not-Russian Ratman (aka Blyatman) furrier who answered Zena's ad for an adventuring ratman retainer.
- Meteor Power Shower, a Barbarian bowyer who claims to be a Magma Hun.

New Backstory:
- Borodin, original name Buttshine, retired from adventuring to be a successful dog breeder. His drinking habit eventually led to his god Brodin telling him to change his name and head to Helix, a plan which went off without a hitch. (Once per session, one planned action goes off without a hitch!)
- Zena was once captured by demons and at their mercy, luckily a rat helped chew through her bonds and she took the opportunity to escape! (No chance of passing out from Pain while fleeing)
- POWERLAD's parents' crossbow-making trade was under threat from a devious tax collector bent on putting them out of business. POWERLAD, naturally, joined the resistance! (Once per session, you can find a defector in the room)
- Chiffon disappointed everyone by doing something he had sworn never to do.... wear socks with sandals. (Once per session you can automatically pass an attack, save and/or skill roll. Once each. For the rest of the session you get -2 to that type of roll.)
- Insanity Mammoth was looting a church for its sweet architecturally and historically valuable architecture when the entire steeple fell on him and broke all of his bones except for the all-important collarbones. He lay there for weeks, subsisting only on the woodlice and grubs that crawled near his broken-jawed mouth. (Once per session, survive the results of a cataclysmic failure)

Enemies Defeated:
- A superleech!!! (750 exp)
- A gang of mongreloids (50 exp)
- A powerful and disease-ridden 'pudding' (750 exp)
Total: 1550 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- 101gp (5050 exp)
- A map
-1001cp (101 exp)
Total: 5151 exp

Exploration:- Explored 8 dungeon rooms (160 exp)- 1 Wandering Monster rolled (50 exp)
Total: 210 exp

Events:
- In the town square, the party pay the town crier to drum up some hirelings. Success! (50 exp)
- Zena is disappointed that no ratmen showed up yet, and hires a single man-at-arms to help with the murders. (50 exp)
- Insanity Mammoth is still too much of a burns victim to gain HP, but he's somehow acquired a wheelchair and hires a wheelchair-pusher for his ill-advised foray into the Barrowmaze. (50 exp)
- Joining the group today is Boradin, a Nonanist Cleric who follows the party god Brodin. Carousing is discussed before it is decided that they'll just party when they get back. (50 exp)
- A series of 666 crows descends upon Spicy Mac's shop and requests that someone clear out 3 rooms in Area 3 of the Barrowmaze in exchange for 1001cp. "We were going there anyway" says the party.
- Everyone pays Grim Charlie his silver to let them fast travel, and the group heads to the Barrowmoor. Insanity Mammoth's wheelchair, presumably, rumbles along behind. (50 exp)
- At the Barrows, Insanity Mammoth tries to exort his fellow adventurers to help him loot the actual physical dungeon and its actual physical architecture. Chiffon's not having any of it. (50 exp)
- They enter the previously excavated barrow and briefly attempt to remove the hot plate from the lower chamber. Chisels result in boiling steam spurting out. (50 exp)
- The mysterious fog fills the room, possibly unrelated, and brings with it fatigue. The party are forced to rest for ten minutes to get back to strength. (50 exp)
- They head for the dungeon proper and Insanity Mammoth complains about the lack of handicapped accessibility in this dungeon as he's manhandled down the stairs. Great point. (50 exp)
- The door into the infamous leech room is opened... and a great big leech is revealed squatting in the pool of water. Insanity Mammoth decides to ignore it and go around the edge of the room. (50 exp)
Insanity Mammoth shoots his new mighty bow at it from the wheelchair. BAD IDEA! The leech lunges and stretches reeaaal long! Luckily it goes for his disability assistant who begins getting drained! (50 exp)

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- POWERLAD misses with his crossbow and is mildly embarrassed, Zena swaps electricity for fire on her halberd, Borodin charges a Magma Beam. (50 exp)
- Together, the fire makes the great leech release its bloodsucking grip on John the Disability Attendant and the magma solidifies on its body making it fall back into the pool. (50 exp)
- It sinks, and Zena finishes it off by sticking the electric-glyph end of her halberd into the water, frying that sucker. (50 exp)
- They continue to explore. A room with a mural like cloaked figures walking clockwise around a spiral on the floor is found. POWERLAD walks clockwise and reveals it to be a cool optical illusion where the spiral retracts into darkness like it's disappearing into a pit.. (50 exp)
- Insanity Mammoth continues trying to persuade the party that they should loot the very walls of the dungeon, starting with this mural. Fog rolls past everyone's ankles and fatigue sets in again. (50 exp)
- After further rest, some doors are inspected. One has the electric trap from last session, and POWERLAD discovers he takes half damage from electricity AND can use the other half to boost the damage of his next punch. (50 exp)
- The other room has a slime trail where something plopped off the ceiling and crawled into a hole. Borodin magma-beams it and fries it good. (50 exp)
- There's a weird shitty bathroom in a tiny room. Borodin takes the opportunity to relieve himself, but awkwardly the toilet doesn't flush. (50 exp)
- Insanity Mammoth's wheelchair thumps over a pit trap. He makes John shove him forward so he crashes into the edge of a corridor on the other side. John follows sheepishly. (50 exp)
- Unfortunately Nix is just a step behind and triggers the trap! She falls 20' but is fairly ok.  She's pulled out with a rope and the slowly-closing lid is spiked shut. Insanity Mammoth also creates a dirt ramp. (50 exp)

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Ahead, he hears muffled voices questioning the noise. He wheels around the corner and sees some of the mismatched animal body part Mongreloids at the other end of the room! They flee as he charges in his wheelchair! (50 exp)
- Thwarted, Insanity Mammoth looks around. There is a pit in this room, and a lingering sweetness. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD is tied to a rope and lowered into the pit. He is struck by the sleep-inducing spores exuded by the purple moss but keeps his head, blinking through drowsy eyes at a couple of man-sized lumps under the thick growth. (50 exp)
- He gets himself raised back up and activates a Take-Light-Earth glyph. The spores are sucked into the runes, allowing him to touch down at the bottom and investigate the bodies. Moss grows up his legs, but no quick enough. (50 exp)

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- POWERLAD claims a bunch of gold and a map that shows a route to "the Pit" with a warning not to go there! Sweet! (50 exp)
- Chiffon summons a a ghostly bouncer to let him through a locked door, who obliges after checking him and his mates off the ghostly guest list. (50 exp)
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- A wall of stench billows through the opened door. Inside, a gloopy stinky ooze has schlooped over a body which it is slowly digesting! (50 exp)
- Insanity Mammoth yells CHARGE! John the attendant wheels him in at ramming speed, hits a bump, and sends the barbarian flying towards the ooze with axe held high! (50 exp)
- He slams in, a spray of awful pus splurts from the wound and grants him a terrible disease, and Insanity Mammoth's uncanny luck sends him sliding all the way out of the room to the edge of the purple moss pit. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD is a pro and tosses a lantern in... but for the first time in a long time purging with flaming oil has a worse effect! The fire boils the goop, and acrid clouds of virulent disease blast through the room before POWERLAD can close the door! (50 exp)
- John the disability attendant doesn't stand a fucking chance. He dies in the corner, not that anybody remembers he was there. (50 exp)
- Nix and Zena pull emergency mould masks over their mouths, activating the Take Plant runes on the front. Safety from disease! (50 exp)
- Chiffon slides towards the unconscious bulk of Insanity Mammoth and sweeps him into the sleepy moss pit, saving him from the ooze. What a save! (50 exp)
- Meanwhile the blob advances on Zena and Nix as they drag the unconscious and feverish POWERLAD from out of harm's way. (50 exp)
- Borodin, meanwhile, fights through the fever burning through his veins and sprints away,
- Zena jumps in front, taking the hit. It slams her hard with a blobby protuberance, knocking the wind out of her and disabling her spore mask. Her next shuddering breath draws in the disease cloud and the pox spreads through her system. (50 exp)
- Down the hole, Chiffon first aids Insanity Mammoth back to consciousness. He starts dragging himself up the rope (still tied to the battered wheelchair in the gloop's original room) and activates RAGE as soon as he starts losing consciousness! (50 exp)
- He crests the lip on burnt-to-fuck legs and "angrily" looses an arrow towards the glop, following up with an instakill gambit to take it out of the fight! (50 exp)
- His blood-maddened eyes turn on Zena and Nix, but before he can murder all his friends, Chiffon saves the day AGAIN by tackling Insanity Mammoth into the pit AGAIN. (50 exp)
- Insanity Mammoth lands on a spike... and he's not happy about it. Chiffon tries to cast Spiderclimb to escape, but Insanity Mammoth's flailing disrupts the spell! The chaos burst turns Chiffon chartreuse, and deludes him into thinking his long lost brother is one of the corpses. (50 exp)
- Crying out he starts digging, only for Insanity Mammoth to cleave through one of his arms at the elbow! (50 exp)
- Chiffon angrily slices at the raging barbarian, slicing the top of his head clean off... but Insanity Mammoth's twitching corpse manages to slice Chiffon's other arm off before finally collapsing. (50 exp)
- Chiffon dies, spurting blood from both sides, leaving a perfect Mark Rothko on each side of the pit with his lifeblood. (50 exp)

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- Hearing the savage sounds and following silence, Nix begins dragging the unconscious and feverish bodies of her friends out of the dungeon. Exhausted, she pays Grim Charlie the travel costs and collapses in the back covered in blood and stench. (50 exp)
- On the way back, her diseased compatriots fall into a coma. Worried, Nix dumps them in the cheapest inn room she can find and retires to her own lavish suite. Bertha, POWERLAD's loving wife, does her best to try to wake her comatose husband from his fever to no avail. (50 exp)
- She falls back onto the fluffy perfumed pillows of her room's four-poster and, concern for her fellow party member paramount in her mind, opens her book on Disease. Will rune magic assist in curing them? Yes, it says. (50 exp)
- Meanwhile, Ratimir the Ratman enquires after Zena's job offer, and Meteor Power Shower the Magma Hun shows up in town. (50 exp)
- "Fuck I hope Andy's here next week", say all. (50 exp)
Total: 2500 exp

Misc:
- AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaa bonus (50 exp)
- Absolutely Disgusting 
bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Bookworm bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Rescue bonus (50 exp)
- Henchman Abuse bonus (50 exp)
- I Immediately Regret This Decision bonus (50 exp)- Internecine Strife bonus (50 exp)
- Kill It With Fire bonus (50 exp)
- Leave a Man Behind bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous Gore bonus (50 exp)
- Poison is OP bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- SpoOoOoky bonus (50 exp)
- This! Is! Sparta! bonus (50 exp)
- Tomb Raider bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)
Total: 1150 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer 
(Charles / Zena - 100 exp)
- Caller (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Mapper (Fraser / Nix - 100 exp)
- Guard (Tom / Insanity Mammoth - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Charles*2 - 100 exp ea.)
- Artapalooza bonus (Charles*2 - 100 exp ea.)
- Chipbringer (Tom*2 - 200 exp)
JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Fraser, James - 500 exp ea.)
- Teamkilled bonus (Insanity Mammoth, Chiffon - 500 exp ea.)
- Awesome death bonus (Insanity Mammoth - 500 exp)
- Noble Sacrifice bonus (Chiffon - 1000 exp)
- Diseased bonus (Zena, POWERLAD, Borodin - 100 exp ea.)
- Death's Witness bonus (All who heard the screams - 100 exp ea.)

Rumours:
I forgot to roll for these OOPS

Active Businesses:
- Bone Alone. Wild. 348sp. (Zena's Stake: 232sp, Carrie's Stake: 116sp)
- Spicy Mac's Spices. Risky. 4000sp.

Out of Action:
- Gimlass. Broken Collarbone. Healed by: 2nd November 1660.

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Insanity Mammoth, stabbed through the head by Chiffon after being tackled into a pit to save others from his rage
- Chiffon, dismembered by the enraged Insanity Mammoth after stabbing him through the head in an effort to save others from his rage.
Exp Totals:
- Fraser / Nix Neckbiter, Level 6 Barbarian: 50471 (Level up at 64000)- Kitty / POWERLAD!, Level 6 Muscle Wizard: 46331 (Level up at 72000)
- Charles / Zena, Level 6 Fighter: 41566 (Level up at 64000)- James / Chiffon, Level 4 Elf (Canny Childe): 13945 (Level up at 24000)
*DECEASED*
- Tom / Insanity Mammoth, Level 4 Barbarian: 13905
 (Level up at 16000)*DECEASED*- Sunni / Borodin, Level 4 Cleric: Guest Appearance!
- James / Ratimir, Level 3 Ratman: 3761 (Level up at 6000)
*DING!* +1d6 HP! Max Rats - 4! +backstory!
*DING!* +1d6 HP! Max rats - 9! +backstory!

- Tom / Meteor Power Shower, Level 2 Barbarian: 3061 (Level up at 4000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +2 rolls on Barbarian Levelup table! +backstory!

Absent or Retired:- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 5 Cleric: 24337 (Level up at 28000)
Nix's Retainer
--- Huz, Level 0 Hireling
- Tom / Spicy Mac, Level 2 Halfling: 3457 (Level up at 4000)- Eleanor / Mugg, Level 2 Fighter: 2357 (Level up at 4000)- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Amar / Amar's Cleric, Level 1 Cleric: 1413 (Level up at 1750)

- Henry / Henry's Next Character: +2084 exp
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)

- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)

- Eglė / Bob, Level 1 Dwarf: 434 (Level up at 2200)

- Ollie / Andromeda Spiderbite, 
Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 19872 (Level up at 36000)
Will / Cecil Fulbright, Level 5 Cleric (Termaxian): 15063 (Level up at 28000)
- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)

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