Session 204 - Usurper of Fate

Ahhhh yes, a day I'll look back on in years to come and go "remember when they fucked up the world in a way I'd literally never expected?" Maximum Godhead Hyper-Jesus is now in control of the walking city Battlefortress Fate! Ereshkigal the Gravity Dragon is creating a gravity well to destroy the tentacle! The Black Sun has blossomed, creating all-encompassing darkness! It's the end of all things, baby!

POWERLAD uploads a god.

Styx starts a revolution. Sir Robyn welcomes our heroes to the big city. Dumbledorris temporarily kills her baby. Galaxy Johnson signs books he doesn't remember writing. Snels struggles to catch up with the current state of the world. William Fox-Shitt is impossibly posh.

God there's a lot of art this week! Amazing.

I'm off sick today but I'll drag myself to run D&D anyway. Hashtag commitment.

Session 204 - Usurper of Fate

Campaign Date:

Saturday, 28 May, 1601

Moon Phase: Waxing Gibbous

Zenith: The Allfather

Zodiac: Taurus

New Backstory:
- Galaxy Johnson’s mother was dying back on his home planet. When medicine failed, he turned to dark and forbidden means to save her… forbidden arts that had him exiled from his planet in a meteor. Eventually he crash-landed on Earth, starting this whole weird saga. (+1 Arcana)

- Dumbledorris’ birthday was ruined when Synthia fought with her over digesting that Necromancer… and they even got pregnant! (On May 24th every game year, and every real year, and your real birthday - a named NPC turns up at the start of the session)

- Andromeda used to party with all the other alternate timeline Andromedas back in Ereshkigal’s drakencult… until the POWERLADs showed up and ruined things by putting them back in line. (Once per session, make everything absolutely go to shit in an unexpected way)

- When POWERLAD first learnt to Fly, he tested it by jumping from high places. The first few times it didn’t work and he really hurt himself. (Half damage from falls)

- Just before RJ's brothers and sisters bled out, they told him the secret that would shatter his world forever - they actually like him. It was the kick he needed to turn his life around and call himself Lonely Blade. (+1 Wisdom)

Treasure and Equipment:

-

Total: 0 exp

Enemies Defeated:

-

Total: 0 exp

Exploration:

- First party to enter Fate in Battlefortress Mode (500 exp)

Total: 500 exp

Events:

--- Doomed Earth
- Following last week’s retreat from some angry floating tentacle things, the Gubers take the long route around. Battlefortress Fate, the walking city, looms ahead. Its brass legs straddle the walled town of Salisburgh. (50 exp)

- We hear about where Snels was during the wake... and it's not pretty. (50 exp)

- POWERLAD tries to get a line to Hyper-Jesus through his earpiece, but the connection is very shaky and keeps dropping out. He tries some hymns to no effect, and Styx sure isn’t going to help. (50 exp)

- They draw closer. On the horizon the city-scale black Apocalypse Dragon Ereshkigal pulls itself to its feet. One of its enormous wings droops weakly against its flank, seemingly broken in its titanic fall. It breathes gravity and drags a strand of the Prime Tentacle towards its mouth, clamping down and tearing it off. The tentacle is already regenerating. (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson reaches out to the Dragon, praying fervently for it to triumph. He is filled with some of its power, granting him a deeper bond with the Gravity Dragon. (50 exp)
--- Welcome to Salisburgh
- After an hour or so they reach the walls of Salisburgh. There’s a shout of surprise from the walls - they weren’t expecting to see anyone alive out there! (50 exp)
- Soon a platform is rigged up over the pocked and scarred walls and lowered towards them. On the platform is a man in battleworn armour who has an unaccountably Mexican accent. He’s also seemingly perpetually angry. (50 exp)

- He challenges the party on their intentions, but recognises POWERLAD! Who doesn’t at this point honestly? POWERLAD explains that they’re heading into Fate to meet up with a friend - Sir Robyn - maybe you know of him? He does, and he hates lawyers. (50 exp)
- He tells POWERLAD that the guy in control of the defenders of this city is called Guido Maloney. High-fives all round! (50 exp)
- In the sky above the angels begin singing their warning song like an air raid siren, the rising-falling wail. The sound pings Styx’s angel-bot, and even Battlefortress Fate above begins singing with a distorted voice. (50 exp)
- Those who know the angel language hear the message: “-- REPORT -- BLACK SUN BLOSSOMS -- PROPHECY CONFIRMED -- TRUMPET SOUNDED --”
- The guard shouts for those above to open the gates and the platform is pulled back up on ropes. Styx triggers his angel’s flight mode and follows him up. (50 exp)
- He looks to the north and sees what the angels are singing about. Pitch darkness is blossoming in the distance, getting ever closer, like vast petals bursting and unfolding in overlapping waves, covering the earth and sky in impenetrable dark. (50 exp)

- As the darkness spreads it covers the floating angel-stations in the skies above. One by one they are silenced. He sees the black waves reach Dwimmermount, and at the same moment the Hyper-Jesus communicator in POWERLAD’s ear goes silent. (50 exp)
--- The Allfather takes nobody’s shit
- Styx turns and lands his angel on the parapet. The angry lieutenant rounds on him and asks what religion he belongs to. Nonanist is the wrong answer. He gets irate and berates Styx for his false faith. (50 exp)

- At that, Styx’s angel’s god-projector activates and projects an image of a God. It’s a big buff old guy! The Allfather! (50 exp)

- The Lieutenant staggers back in shock, and the Allfather chastises him for insulting the New Messiah before activating the angel’s cannons and blasting him in the chest! (50 exp)
- He turns to Styx and tells him there’s not much time - the darkness is cutting off comms with the angels and activating the destroy-all-targets failsafe. Styx would be wise to deactivate this angel before it goes haywire. (50 exp)
- He’s in a hurry to leave, but Styx asks about Battlefortress Fate before he goes. He says it’s an anomalous structure, predating his own existence. The Gods know it’s an ark, meant to save life from cataclysm, and says they should stop using up reserve biomass to resurrect the dead - that’s meant to be converted to food! (50 exp)
- He winks out and Styx raises his voice - he is the Messiah! A lone man advances, spear raised and disbelieving, but POWERLAD chooses that exact moment to land in front of him! Bertha hops down from his arms and both the robot-armoured Break and the shadowy form of Galaxy Johnson appear at either side! (50 exp)

- The lone man’s spear tip quivers and lowers to the ground. POWERLAD gently disarms him. The soldiers on the walls fall to their knees and praise the new Lord. (50 exp)
--- Unnatural Darkness
- There’s no time to pray, the wave of darkness is nearly upon them! They all flee along the wall, the Gubers keeping pace on the city road below! (50 exp)

- It’s no use running. The darkness washes over them all and sounds become faded and muffled. Only those with alternate means of vision can see. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD punches his fists together and casts Continual Light. Suddenly they can see! But it’s a strange light - it creates a radius of normal light that suddenly ends at a smooth wall of pitch blackness. A bubble of light. (50 exp)

- Torches are lit, and the blackness at the limits quivers and shivers as the flame flickers. Bubbles of light can connect to each other, allowing sightlines, but as soon as they’re too far apart you’re on your own. (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson takes a torch to the Gubers below and makes sure to keep in range of the light on the wall, essentially creating a hole through which they can see each other and communicate. Better than nothing! (50 exp)
- Dumbledorris tries seeing what happens if she walks into the darkness. Moopy the Gloopy goes quiescent in her arms and she feels a tremendous cold that makes her want to curl into a ball and hibernate. It’s fine in the light though, Moopy quickly returning to her wiggly self. (50 exp)

--- Old Man Guido
- They continue along the wall until they reach more bubbles of torchlight held by guards on the walls. They ask for news of their fellow guardsmen and head off to rescue them from the impossible blackness. (50 exp)
- Behind them, lit by yet more hastily lit torches, is a huge grinning skull built into the wall! It looks like it’s made of papier mache or something. Emerging from the mouth is an enormous skeleton, bones held together with bandages, and wearing an eyepatch because that’s what happens to grizzled old callbacks. It’s Guido! He lives! (50 exp)

- He sees POWERLAD and says “No… it can’t be? POWERLAD?! The son of POWERMAN and Sophia?!” (50 exp)
- They embrace, Guido telling him that he knew POWERLAD’s parents well. POWERLAD asks directly for exposition, and boy does he get it! (50 exp)

- Cardinal Scream was defeated at the Barrowmaze by the vampire lord Cyrus Carnithrex Maximus. Guido is keeping his last soul-raven alive in here. The trouble with having your soul in a series of birds is that it’s hard to catch more if you run low. (50 exp)
- Sir Robyn turned up with a real splash in Fate a little while ago. He’s not well-liked since there’s a perceived conflict of interest when his raccoon familiars are often each defence and prosecutor in the same case. (50 exp)
- The current Fated Queen is Seraph Dawnstride. She emerged from the Resurrection Engine last month and soon took the city in a great Termaxian revolution. The previous Fated Queen is nowhere to be seen. (50 exp)
-  Last word from the surviving Rebel Dead is that they assaulted Mt Death Frost while Cyrus was focused on the Barrowmaze. Ominously, they encountered no resistance. When they finally broke into the Black Fortress at the peak, they discovered a vast cache of food, water, and a block of glowing ice containing the body of a Barbarian Queen… (50 exp)
- Glutted with exposition, the party prepares to move on. POWERLAD tries to convert Guido to worship of Ninhursag, but Guido says he’s seen many POWERLADs fall in service of the black dragon so his faith is low. Also, might not work since he’s a skeleton and all. (50 exp)
--- Ascending to Fate
- They are led to the great brass chains that dangle from Fate’s flanks. Each chain is as thick as a man, and living semi-mechanical “elevators” with human minds drag passengers upwards to Fate. (50 exp)

- Every so often, when Fate’s beam cannon fires, the whole city freezes in time for a few moments as the city rocks back and the sky blurs overhead. The unnatural darkness cannot penetrate the city’s time-field, giving everyone inside the impression of being within an enormous snow globe surrounded by blackness. (50 exp)
- Styx gets Break to lighten the load on the huffing puffing elevator man. Since he doesn’t have to huff and puff so much, he tells them that being remade into this machine was his punishment for a crime - death is no punishment in a city where the population gets resurrected. (50 exp)

- When the elevator reaches the top of the chain, the party step out and find a huge crowd waiting for them! At its head is Sir Robyn! He runs forward to greet them and shake hands, directing POWERLAD and Galaxy Johnson to a book signing table he’s set up for them! (50 exp)
- He reveals that he’s finished work on his time travel spell - dubbed The Timewarp - which will take them back to the moment that the infamous wish was made. Alternate solution to apocalypse acquired! (50 exp)
- He gets distracted by William Fox-Shitt’s attempts to impress with his family tree, and Styx tries to create a religious schism by praying fervently to the Allfather! (50 exp)
- Inside the city’s shield, the Allfather answers! Projecting a huge head above the gathered crowds, the Allfather declares Seraph’s rule of the city unjust! When the projection fades, Styx and his disciples head out into the crowd stoking counter-revolutionary fervour! (50 exp)
- POWERLAD tries to get in contact with Hyper-Jesus and finds himself in perfectly clear contact for the first time since the party left Dwimmermount! Hyper-Jesus commands him to find a way to plug the communicator into the city. (50 exp)
--- The Commute
- For the first time in a long time, it’s time to use Fate’s transport networks to get around the city! Styx lets them go, it’s time for him to stir up some dissent! (50 exp)

- The main party sees a number of things on the way. At the change from the oft-graffiti’d Central Line recruiters for Maintenance give out fliers at the station. Massive rate cuts for life to those who join them in repairing the great mechanical city. (50 exp)
- They also see the great Impound of Flesh - where criminals are remade for their crimes and forced into civil service. A crablike cage-person walks towards the Impound, prisoner within. The prisoner protests their innocence while the cage-person sonorously declares their crimes. (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson tries to ask around for more information but sounds like he’s propositioning everyone for sex, and is also a freaky shadow-alien hybrid. (50 exp)
- William Fox-Shitt peels off to head for the most gentrified area he can find - the fabled Cullingdon Club - while the others take the clean no-eye-contact Hub Line to Sciotherico. (50 exp)
- He changes at Glob, seeing the many ads for classic long-running ratman sitcom F.I.E.N.D.S, and winds up at the hyper-gentrified St Toff’s. Perfect! (50 exp)
- The rest arrive at Sciotherico. The queues at the exit are long, but Sir Robyn takes them down the far shorter VIP queue with a big wink. (50 exp)
- The woman at the booth at the end of the VIP line requests credentials. Sir Robyn clearly has a rapport with her, but upon discovering that Galaxy Johnson, THE Galaxy Johnson, is here she loses her shit and gets him to sign her copy of POWERLAD’s Giant Weapon. After gushing a while she lets them right through! (50 exp)
--- Usurper of Fate
- They enter the vast throne room. Guards wielding huge halberds line the long carpet to the throne. Floating above it, connected to the ceiling by glowing cables of light that attach to the wooden circlet on her brow, is Seraph Dawnstride. The Fated Queen. (50 exp)

- She opens her eyes, and the focus on POWERLAD. She recognises him, but warns against approaching closer. (50 exp)

- The wooden crown contains the souls and memories of 600 years of Fated Monarchs, together they are taking the cognitive load required to command the Battlefortress. The outer gold crown was taken by Jade when she was ousted from the throne. (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson immediately tells POWERLAD to step forward immediately (his words). POWERLAD steps forth, hearing Hyper-Jesus tell him to put himself ear-to-ear with Seraph. (50 exp)
- He puts his head next to Seraph’s… and with a flash of pain the communicator device leaps into Seraph’s ear. (50 exp)
- Seraph smiles wildly, proclaiming “I feel so… happy!” (50 exp)
- She collapses limply, hanging from the cables by the head. There is a pulse of energy and the guards collapse in a wave. The throne becomes a sphere of red brass that begins to close around her. Her last words, as the room starts to shudder - (50 exp)
- “You should run” (50 exp)
- They book it! Around them the walls whir and change, the brass plates rippling and reformatting. They emerge from the palace at a dead sprint, confused crowds looking around as the klaxons play a song somewhere between these three themes. (50 exp)
- The blackness of the sky above is split by a glowing red cross, surrounded by a bright red halo. They compress, and the sky is shattered by a pulse of bright energy! As the afterimages clear, the black sky cracks and disperses! (50 exp)
- Distantly, the multiple strands of the prime tentacle are wrapping around themselves to form back into a single limb. Beside it, Ereshkigal is floating from the earth, body and limbs dangling, head craning upwards to the sky. Above its enormous snout, a ball of pure black is forming. Clouds and gale-force winds whip towards the gravity well. (50 exp)

- The party is rushing after Sir Robyn, heading for his Fate office. Shouting over the gale, POWERLAD shouts “SO ABOUT THAT TIME TRAVEL SPELL…” (50 exp)

Total: 3100 exp

Misc:

- Aggressive Negotiations bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)
- Better Part of Valour bonus (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Diplomancy bonus (50 exp)
- Fame bonus (50 exp)
- Heresy bonus (50 exp)
- Holy bonus (50 exp)
- Infamy bonus (50 exp)
- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)
- Noblebright bonus (50 exp)
- Politico bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)
Total: 800 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:

- Remembrancer (Carter / Styx - 100 exp ea)

- Caller (Kitty / POWERLAD)- 100 exp)
- Mapper (Carter / Styx - 100 exp)

- Treasurer (Charles / Galaxy Johnson - 100 exp)

- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)

- Tracker (Suzie / Dumbledorris  - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Carter, Charles, Suzie, George - 100 exp)
- Artapalooza bonus (Carter, Charles, Suzie - 100 exp)
- Attacco d’Arte bonus (Charles, Suzie - 100 exp)

- Chippo Man bonus (Suzie*2 - 100 exp ea.)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Charles, Kitty - 500 exp)

Active Businesses:

- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1020sp. (Ratimir)

- Blood Honey Healing 4 U (Co-dependent businesses)

--- Honey Healing. Safe. 1095sp. (Bertha)

--- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 10515sp. (Sir Robyn)

Rumours:

-

Death Toll and Injuries:

-

Exp Totals:

Exp Totals:

- Kitty / High Priest POWERLAD!, Level 8 Muscle Wizard: 146469 (Level up at 288000)

-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 11 (-55% exp)

--- Andromeda, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 20491 (Level up at 36000)

---- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 6 (-25% exp) --- Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 10165 (Level up at 18000)
---- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 3 (-15% exp)- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 6 Magic-User: 61149 (Level up at 72000)- Charles / Galaxy Johnson, Level 6 Reincarnated Shadow-Elf: 50823 (Level up at 96000)
-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 3 (-15% exp)

- Suzie / Dumbledorris2, Level 6 Inheritor: 38455 (Level up at 72000)
- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 5121 (Level up at 7000)
- George / Snels, Level 2 Fighter: 2425 (Level up at 4000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +1 to hit! +1 to crit/fumble! +backstory!

Exp Totals 2 - Styx and the Twelve Apostles:

- Carter / Styx, Level 7 Goblin: 79452 (Level up at 128000)

--- Break, Robo-Armoured Goblin Buddy
--- 5 more Goblin Buddies
--- Lady Goth, Level 4 Necromancer: 9137 (Level up at 18000)
--- Ilda, Level 4 Fighter: 8208 (Level up at 16000)
--- Heriod, Level 3 Elf (Hauntling Glister): 6137 (Level up at 12000)
--- Zam, Level 2 Fighter: 2137 (Level up at 4000)

--- Brindlefaust, Level 2 Specialist: 1637 (Level up at 3000)

--- Blitzer, Level 2 Specialist: 1637 (Level up at 3000)

Absent or Retired:

- Timothy / RJ, Level 6 Spider Fighter: 32638 (Level up at 64000)
- Jevgeni / Antez, Level 2 Necromancer: 3148 (Level up at 4500)
- Grecia / Glycon, Level 2 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 3148 (Level up at 6000)
- Ollie / Flaming Fury, Level 6 Dwarf: 48119 (Level up at 70400)

-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 4 (-20% exp)

---Synthia, Level 5 Inheritor: 24881 (Level up at 36000)

---- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 3 (-15% exp)

- Tim D / Mortlocke, Level 1 Necromancer: 2043 (Level up at 2250)

- James / Ratimir, Level 6 Ratman: 33991 (Level up at 48000)   

- Henry / Witchfinder-Sergeant, Level 5 Cleric (Unorthodox): 14963 (Level up at 28000)

--- Erstwhile, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 3105 (Level up at 4500)

- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 6 Termaxian Cleric: 52811 (Level up at 56000)

--- 4 Henchmen Undeserving of Names, Level 0 Bootlickers  

- Kitty / 

- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)

- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)

- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)