Session 52 - Back to Civilisation

Finally a break from all the doom and gloom!

Big money big money means you can live like kings or waste it all on hookers and blow, your call.

If you're interested you can find a list of random stuff you can do with your money here 

and for the equipment list I guess you'll just have to download the rulebook here.

Equipment starts on page 27.

For Oli - Titus totally had some money in the bank! Less death tax, Lulu's got a big 900 silver in there if/when she takes over the account.

For Dominic - How do you even explain your eyepatch to people? "Yea sorry I've got to keep this on because otherwise a horrible dwarf can see through my eye"?

For all - I also totally forgot to let you guys roll for rumours when you finally got back to civilisation, so I rolled up a few.

- "There was once a Dwarven fortress in the mountains near Pembrooktonshire, but it was destroyed by a dragon over a thousand years ago. It's true it's still there! They have to placate it every year!"
- "At Monk Hill their Moon Festival involves the sacrifice of children. It's barbaric!"

- "The Animal Arena is back in Edge! The Termaxians might be heathens, but damn can they put on a show."

Session 52 - Back to Civilisation

Campaign date:
Friday, 20 September, 1549
Moon phase: First Quarter
Zodiac: Virgo

New Characters:

- Joe Joe, a Halfling who has vowed to avenge her parents' deaths at the hands of a murderer. As the murderer escaped, they accidentally dropped a bracelet in a big pile of shit. They justifiably left it behind. Joe Joe dug through the pile to find the bracelet, and used her newfound skills to begin a career in gongfarming. Now she travels the world to find the one who killed her parents.

- "Sir" Stabbington Shanks, a Fighter and former nightwatchman who accidentally smacked the guard captain in the head one night, thinking him a criminal. You're a loose cannon, Stabbington! You're off the force!

Enemies defeated:

- Höolloch by Frosen, critted in a single shot from Lulu's hypertoxic crossbow bolts. (250 exp)

Total: 250 exp

Treasure and Equipment:

- A bunch of sacks perfectly sized for human heads (3 exp)

- A chain with grapple (20 exp)

- Three sets of handcuffs (30 exp)

- 22625sp, including profits from silk, ambergris, Starry Hrad's reward for proving there's no gold, and all the rest. Split 7 ways for about 50 gold each.

- Much equipment was bought on the return to town.

Total: 53 exp

Exploration:

- Up to 150 miles of travel (500 exp)

- First party to enter Clunge (hurr hurr) (100 exp)

Total: 600 exp

Events:

- Exited the pit, found corpse-puppet, went to see the Reed People refugees after the newt people took over their village (50 exp)

- Amazingly, Bob totally learnt the click-language of the Reed People when she was working on a slaving ship, strikes up conversation. (50 exp)

- The Reed People can't take back their village because their chieftains have lost their souls. Joe Joe "returns the soul" of one of the chieftains via mind control, chieftain leads Reed People in a glorious charge to retake the village. Newt people take one look and leg it. (50 exp)

- A bunch of jerks on top of the wall are seen through a spyglass. They wave, point at creepy Dwarf on canyon wall. Laugh. (50 exp)
- They yell down from the top of the wall when you're close enough. Have a conversation, they're jerks. They ask about a book. Suddenly Sir Stabbington Shanks is hit from behind by a weird bolt that gives his left eye a second pupil. They leave. (50 exp)

- The wall is climbed and the central breach is climbed down to get to a moored skiff. Halfway down one of the jerks yells from above not to steal his boat. Lulu crits him in the throat and he explodes into poison. (50 exp)

- Bob looks up at the dam as you sail away, sees Dwarf, puts two and two together - the creepy Dwarf can totally see through Stabbington's fucked up eye. Stabbington makes himself a mask to cover that eye, stares at his own balls for a while.

- Lulu rescues DeCosta's horse and skiff. Everyone heads to the Witch village, half the village is dead-eyed and staring from their roofs. Second skiff is given to the non-creepy villagers. How to kill the witch is debated at length, final decision: fuck that. (50 exp)

- Getting to Carrowmore is otherwise uneventful. Starry Hrad is grateful for your bag of iron pyrite, says it's totally great proof of lack of gold. Gives the 5000sp reward in a strongbox. (50 exp)
- Starving Carrowmore townsfolk buy a lot of livestock from the island from you. (50 exp)

- You sail to Gush and Bob meets her old mate Derek from her sailing days! Good bloke, Derek. (50 exp)

- Assets are liquidated and buying stuff ensues. Big money in the city! The party splits in two, one half to party, the other half to go to the bank. (50 exp)
- Party Animals head to Clunge and get wasted. Peggy wakes up with a clear head despite drinking the most, Lulu and Bob get into different kinds of sexy trouble. (50 exp)

- The Fiscally Responsible head to the bank in Edge by way of John Doe's mining business. He drops off his blood-powered mining machine and begins cooking up plans for a reliable supply of blood, possibly in a joint venture with Peggy. They get to Edge and deposit money in the bank. (50 exp)

Total: 700 exp

Misc:

- Antagonist Emancipator bonus (50 exp)

- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)

- Diplomacy bonus (50 exp)

- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)

- Fame increased! (50 exp)

- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)

- Noblebright bonus (50 exp)

- Shopping Spree bonus (100 exp)

- OHKO'd Hooloch by Frosen (100 exp)

- Horrifying Realisation bonus (100 exp - Stabbington)

- Badass Backstory Bonus (100 exp - Joe Joe)

- Peggy Caroused! (1760 exp - Peggy)

- Lulu Caroused! (1320 exp - Lulu)

- Bob Caroused! (880 exp - Bob)

Total: 550 exp + bonuses

Quests and Rumours:

- "There was once a Dwarven fortress in the mountains near Pembrooktonshire, but it was destroyed by a dragon over a thousand years ago. It's true it's still there! They have to placate it every year!"
- "At Monk Hill their Moon Festival involves the sacrifice of children. It's barbaric!"

- "The Animal Arena is back in Edge! The Termaxians might be heathens, but damn can they put on a show."

Death Toll and Injuries:

- None today! Except for Sir Stabbington's weird eye thing.

Exp Totals:

Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 18778 (Level up at 35200)

*DING!* +1d10 HP! +1 Lorebond!

-- Mr Burg, Level 2 Fighter: 2981 (Level up at 4000)

-- Pig, Level 1 Porcine.

Leo / Leo, Level 3 Cleric: 6917 (Level up at 7000)

Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 3 Barbarian: 5578 (Level up at 8000)

*DING!* +1d8 HP! +2 rolls on the Barbarian Level Up table!

Kyle / John Doe the Unlucky, Level 2 Dwarf: 4158 (Level up at 4400)

Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2276 (Level up at 4400)

*DING!* +1d12 HP!

Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 1 Fighter: 1396 (Level up at 2000)

Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 1 Halfling: 368 (Level up at 2000)

[[]]

Absent or Retired:

Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 3553 (Level up at 7000)

Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)

Nimrod / U, Level 1 Specialist (Monk): 828 (Level up at 1500)

Leo / Leo, Level 3 Cleric: 6649 (Level up at 7000)

Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)

-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar

Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)

Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)

Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)

Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)

Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)

Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)

Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)

Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)

Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)

Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)

Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)

Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)

Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)

Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)

Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)

Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)

Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)

rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)

Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)

Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)

Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)

John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)

Dana / Bingo, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 1461(Level up at 2250)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human