Session 194 - Revenge of the Frogs!

Big reminder that I'm not going to be running for the next two weeks - 28th I'm in Mexico and 4th the pub is closed for refurb.

Charles is running something on the 28th, and I'm not sure about the 4th but I'm sure he'll send that info out at some point!

Anyway, this was the one with the frog ambush where people nearly died.

SEE YOU SOON!

Session 194 - Revenge of the Frogs!

Campaign Date:

Sunday, 2 May, 1601

Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous

Zodiac: Aries

Treasure and Equipment:

- 450gp, 4000sp (26500 exp)
- Silver goblin-seeking dagger
- Bronze coffer (500 exp)
- Scroll #210
- Scroll #264
- Potion #263
- Potion #137
- Potion #173

Total: 27000 exp

Enemies Defeated:

- 7 frog monsters (450 exp)
- 2 frog ladies (200 exp)

Total: 650 exp

Exploration:

- Explored 2 new dungeon areas (40 exp)
- Found a secret door (50 exp)
- One random encounter (50 exp)

Total: 140 exp

Events:

- The party is down in the midst of the dungeon, close to the now-quiescent smoke-spewing spheres and the dead frog monsters, forging onwards towards the stairs to the Azoth level. (50 exp)
- Dumbledorris has arrived, and Andromeda is scoping for a drug kiss and being weird about it. Dumbledorris denies her… for now (50 exp)
- They travel through the room with the strange geometric patterns, eyes lowered, and continue onwards. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD is a bit confused about the map as they turn a corner, and while he tries to work out the correct way the Witchfinder-Lieutenant feels the power of the Gods Between granting him their luck. (50 exp)
- Instead of frog monsters, the Necromancer girl from Ilda’s party arrives! Her name is Dominique, aka Lady Goth, and she doesn’t want to miss out! (50 exp)
--- Such puzzle, so difficulty

- POWERLAD points on towards a door, which the Witchfinder-Lieutenant dutifully kicks down with a loud yell! Inside is an unfamiliar room with four pillars, and four letters upon the pillars. (50 exp)

- Some very minor experimentation later, the word PATE is spelt out - Latin for “Open!”. A secret door swings wide at the side of the room. Hurrah! (50 exp)
- Everyone is fucking stoked about this secret door and runs in to check it out. But as Zena runs past, a long copper-brown whisker slips out from behind a pillar and brushes across her armour. (50 exp)

- Zena is aghast as her chainmail crumbles to rust before her very eyes! She insists her underclothes are her “Zero Suit” in between cries of rage. (50 exp)
- The culprit scuttles out from behind the pillar and starts happily eating away at the pile of rust. It’s a rust monster! The classic scourge of the D&D world, a big sort of propeller-tailed cockroach with long whisking antennae (50 exp)
- Zena pulls out a bone dagger so she can murder this fucking thing to cries of “no wait don’t it’s really cute!”. The Witchfinder in particular is enamoured with this sweetly chirping beast. (50 exp)
- Styx is scared shitless though. He’s in a god damn metal robot suit, as is his minion Break! This monster is the worst threat possible! They hide outside the room, occasionally yelling through the door. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD holds Zena back in the most embarrassingly terrible wrestle the world has ever seen. Two natural ones. Somehow in the chaos the bone dagger clatters away from Zena’s reach. (50 exp)

--- Treasure!
- Inside the room, nobody else is bothering to find out what’s going outside. They’ve found loot! Four chests full of silver coins and two bronze coffers, one containing a lot of gold and the other containing a very strange maybe-cursed definitely-magical dagger. (50 exp)

- Zena and POWERLAD walk in, mildly chastised, and Zena is IMMEDIATELY drawn to the dagger. The blade is silvery and shimmery, and the “hilt” is a withered and preserved goblin hand. She must have it! (50 exp)

- She grabs it and the goblin hand shifts to mimic her finger movements. The blade is suspended if she opens her hand fully. The blade glows faintly blue and turns to point to the nearest Goblin - Styx! (50 exp)
- The Witchfinder hears that the sounds of happy munching have stopped and chucks one of the bronze coffers out into the middle of the room. No distractions! Outside, the rust monster mewls happily as it devours the metal meal. (50 exp)

- Ilda, the rad scarred Fighter chick who is still the ostensible leader of the other adventuring expedition, makes sure the treasure is evenly distributed between their packs. They take some to Styx who can pack it into his angel bot. (50 exp)

- The Witchfinder goes to check on the rust monster… and finds that it’s gorged itself on the metal chest. It’s struggling to walk and keeps burping up little gouts of iron filings. It’s not going to eat more metal any time soon I can tell you that. (50 exp)

- He ties a rope around it and has to drag the now almost spherical beast along behind him. It’s barely conscious. He loves it so much already. (50 exp)

- POWERLAD’s found the right way now and they head into the room with the wet floor. They ascend the stairs towards the upper level… and silhouetted above is a froggy shape. It croaks in alarm! (50 exp)

--- Frog Madness
- The party unleash bullets and crossbow bolts and it ducks out behind the door frame to avoid them, before jumping away and fleeing. (50 exp)

- The party raise a great warcry and charge up the steps, Zena and POWERLAD out in front! (50 exp)
- The first sign that this might be an ambush occurs when POWERLAD crests the steps and is suddenly struck dumb by the strong smell of froggy pheremones. (50 exp)
- Zena doesn’t notice and charges towards the fleeing frog… only to be hit by a sticky tongue and pulled into the darkness. She keeps hold of her torch though… illuminating a whole bunch of frogs clinging to the pillars! (50 exp)

- There’s a bottleneck at the door. POWERLAD shakes off the pheremones, turns, and is face-to-face with the pheromone-afflicted Andromeda who is naturally face to face with her ideal man and struck with the pain of his unaffection. (50 exp)

- Charging past, the Witchfinder-Lieutenant finds himself looking upon an already-chaotic scene. The room is large and has six pillars, each with grilles leaking water at the head and foot. Each pillar has a frog monster clinging to it, one of which has Zena in its mouth, while POWERLAD and Zena wrestle at the top of the stairs. (50 exp)
- He shouts at his henchlady Erstwhile to help him attack the hurt frog that’s still trying to escape! They both resist the pheremones and ineffectively descend on the frog monster. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD tries to wrestle Andromeda off him, but her emotional turmoil has congealed into rage at POWERLAD! She punches him square in the jaw with a Magic Missile Punch and he goes skidding back across the floor! (50 exp)

- Above their heads, Dumbledorris bounds into the room! Her powerful frog legs fling her up the stairs, bounce again to ricochet her off the doorframe, and send her flying towards the frog that’s biting Zena! (50 exp)
- She hawks up a drug-filled loogie, smears it on her blade in midair, and stabs it into the frog! The frog screams a froggy scream and drops Zena, though its poison continues to pump through her veins. (50 exp)
- Zena lands, grabs her fallen spear, and stabs it right through the frog’s throat! She follows through and stabs through another frog, while Dumbledorris leaps off the pillar and finishes it off by slicing open its throat. Double team! (50 exp)
- While Erstwhile and the Witchfinder take turns exchanging ineffectual attacks with an equally ineffectual frog monster, Styx and Break bomb up the stairs in their mech suits and keep the frogs from attacking POWERLAD and Andromeda! (50 exp)
- Erstwhile’s in trouble - a couple of big hits from the frog monster have laid her low! The Witchfinder tries his hardest to defend her, while Zena and Dumbledorris run over to support. (50 exp)
- Styx is taking a beating from one of the frog monsters. Pissed off, he irises the angel-bot’s central eye open, reaches out, and drags its head inside with him! He snaps the iris close around its neck, constricting ever tighter as it struggles! (50 exp)

- It lashes out with its tongue and drags Styx to its mouth, to his chagrin. The numbing poison begins spreading through his phloem. (50 exp)

--- It gets worse
- Already beset by tough and deadly frog monsters, the arrival of two female pheremone-shrouded frogs is very very unwelcome. They come from behind the pillars where they’ve been hiding, one towards Break and the other towards Zena (50 exp)
- Zena continues to resist the pheremones but can’t resist its slashing claws. She’s so busy defending herself from the female that she doesn’t notice the male biting down on her from behind! The pain poison floods her system, and she fumbles off a shot with her scattershot pistol! (50 exp)
- Dumbledorris uses the distraction to save Erstwhile, dragging her away from mortal danger, while the Witchfinder defends them both. He is distracted momentarily by the sight of a burning heretic as the pheremones hit, but it passes. Not to kinkshame, but that’s fucked up. (50 exp)
- Styx, still dealing with the frog stuck half-in his angel suit, stabs a poison dagger into the side of the frog’s head. It spasms and writhes and collapses. (50 exp)
- Zena finally passes out from the sheer volume of stunning poison, and the Witchfinder stands over her to defend her. This is getting reeaal bad. (50 exp)
- Break in his robot suit finds himself frustratingly ill-equipped to attack a frog squatting high up on a pillar. He just smashes into the pillar itself instead! The pillar collapse, sending a flood of water bursting out across the floor! The frog falls off, surprised! (50 exp)
- Dumbledorris helps to defend Zena… but leaves Erstwhile vulnerable. A frog smashes down on her vulnerable body, clawing off a finger and smashing down on her body. Bruising blossoms around her kidney as it’s crushed. (50 exp)

--- A new hope!
- POWERLAD and Andromeda are finally both free of the pheremones - thank fuck! They look around at the unfolding disaster, nod at each other, and set to work. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD spins and deals a five-finger death punch to the pheremone frog… followed by an explosive headbutt that blows her to smithereens! (50 exp)
- Andromeda jumps off his back to kill the next one. It tries to tongue-grab her in midair! She grabs the tongue, lands on its back, and pulls it backwards as she strangles it to death with its own tongue! (50 exp)
- Dumbledorris hears the yells of triumph and puts her strength into a massive killing blow against the frog that’s been attacking Erstwhile - straight in through the back of the neck and aaaaall the way down. (50 exp)
- The Witchfinder-Lieutenant is face to face with the surviving female frog, pistol in hand. Her froggy eyes bulge wide as he stamps down on her ankles, breaking them with sickening cracks. He puts his pistol straight to her temple and pulls the trigger - executing the last frog. (50 exp)
--- Cleanup
- It’s a pyrrhic victory. Zena is unconscious, poison pumping through her veins. Erstwhile is close to death, she won’t fight again for many weeks. POWERLAD took a hell of a pummelling from Andromeda, who alternates between feeling sheepish and justified. (50 exp)
- The Witchfinder-Lieutenant lays his hands on Zena’s brow and casts Delay Poison. Her eyes flutter open. Phew! She’s got 24 hours until the poison starts affecting her again - hopefully it’ll have been processed through her system by then. (50 exp)
- Unnoticed in the intensity of the ambush - there’s a chest in this room! A chest which contains a fortune in gold coins, along with some scrolls and potions. Nice! (50 exp)
- The Witchfinder-General thanks everyone and leaves, cautioning the party to have saved the world by the time he returns. With him go Erstwhile, over one shoulder, and the overfed Rust Monster. Hopefully Erstwhile will be recovered and the Rust Monster will be trained by the time he returns! (50 exp)
- The rest of the party consider next steps. They’ve been hurt, but not stopped. The Azoth reservoirs are somewhere on this level. Will they press on? Or will Zena follow her dream of cooking up some frog-based cuisine? Guess we’ll find out next week! (50 exp)

Total: 2650 exp

Misc:

- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Rescue bonus (50 exp)
- Enmity Inciter bonus (50 exp)
- Freudian bonus (50 exp)
- Headtaker bonus (50 exp)
- Henchman Abuse bonus (50 exp)
- I Immediately Regret This Decision bonus (50 exp)
- Internecine Strife bonus (50 exp)
- Ludicrous gore bonus (50 exp)
- Noblebright bonus (50 exp)
- Poison is OP bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Puzzlemaster bonus (50 exp)
- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)
- Ridiculously Bad Rolling bonus (50 exp)
- RSPCA bonus (50 exp)
- Tactical Fighting bonus (50 exp)
- Vore bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)

Total: 1150 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:

- Remembrancer (Carter / Styx - 100 exp ea)

- Caller (Charles / Zena - 100 exp)
- Mapper (Charles / Zena - 100 exp)

- Treasurer (Carter / Styx - 100 exp) - Quartermaster (Suzie / Dumbledorris - 100 exp)

- Guard (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)

- Tracker (Henry / Witchfinder - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Carter, Charles - 100 exp ea.)
- Artapalooza bonus (Charles - 100 exp) - Attacco d'Arte bonus (Charles - 100 exp)

- Chippo Man bonus (Henry*2 - 100 exp ea.)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Charles, Henry, Kitty - 500 exp ea.)

Active Businesses:

- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1020sp. (Ratimir)

- Blood Honey Healing 4 U (Co-dependent businesses)

--- Honey Healing. Safe. 1084sp. (Bertha)

--- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 10410sp. (Sir Robyn)

Rumours:

-

Death Toll and Injuries:

- Erstwhile lost a kidney and a finger, but she survived!

Exp Totals:

- Kitty / High Priest POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 128612 (Level up at 144000)

-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 10 (-50% exp)

--- Andromeda, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 11862 (Level up at 18000)

---- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 5 (-10% exp)

- Charles / Zena, Level 6 Fighter: 62846 (Level up at 64000)
- Carter / Styx, Level 6 Goblin: 59472 (Level up at 64000)

--- Break, Robo-Armoured Goblin Buddy
--- A couple of other goblin buddies
--- Ilda, Level 3 Fighter: 4605 (Level up at 8000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +1 to hit! +1 to crit/fumble tables! +backstory!
- Suzie / Dumbledorris2, Level 4 Inheritor: 17186 (Level up at 18000)
--- Lady Goth, Level 2 Necromancer: 2257 (Level up at 4500)
*DING!* +1d4 HP! +1 level 1 spell/day! +free spell! +backstory!

- Henry / Witchfinder-Sergeant, Level 5 Cleric (Unorthodox): 14963 (Level up at 28000)
*DING!* +1d6 HP! +1 level 2 spell/day! +1 level 3 spell/day! +Saves! +backstory!
--- Erstwhile, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 3105 (Level up at 4500)
*DING!* +1d4 HP! +1 level 1 spell/day! +free spell! +backstory!

Absent or Retired:

- Ollie / Flaming Fury, Level 5 Dwarf: 21688 (Level up at 35200)

-- Devotee of Ereshkigal, Bond 3 (-15% exp)

- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 6 Termaxian Cleric: 52811 (Level up at 56000) 
- James / Ratimir, Level 6 Ratman: 33352 (Level up at 48000)

- Ollie / Synthia, Level 5 Inheritor: 24639 (Level up at 36000)

-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 2 (-10% exp)

Carrie's Henchmen

--- 4 Henchmen Undeserving of Names, Level 0 Bootlickers

- Timothy / Spider Squad, Level 4 Spider Extras: 7366 (Level up at 12000)

- Timothy / Sir Robyn, Level 6 Magic-User: 60599 (Level up at 72000)

- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)

- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)

- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)

- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)

- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)