We're back baby! d2020, Year of the Double Crit!
After Andromeda's elephant goes on a rampage and she fills up on its blood, we're straight into the action with a Styx running from a hunting party and a cliffhanger ending mid-battle with enemies who want nothing more than to destroy the Modern Conveniences delivered by DJ's deity.
On with the show!
Session 251 - Attack of the Drones
Date:
December. 15 years after the End.
Character List:
- Andromeda, Laddite Cleric / Kitty
- DJ, Intergalacticist Cleric / Charles
- Granite “Grumpy” Ironjaw, Warden Dwarf / Carter
- Granite “Grumpy” Ironjaw, Warden Dwarf / Carter
- Red, Duellist Fighter / Timothy
- Zulu Snakebite, Barbarian / Ollie
- Dargo, Inheritor / Russell
- The New Moondin Lost Boys, Extras / George
- Ratman, Ratman / Izzy
- Zulu Snakebite, Barbarian / Ollie
- Dargo, Inheritor / Russell
- The New Moondin Lost Boys, Extras / George
- Ratman, Ratman / Izzy
New Backstory:
- Ratman bricked up windows to make his job as a window tapper easier, to the chagrin of the residents who were bricked in. Once per session, prevent something from breaking a barrier or fortification.
- Zulu Snakebite was forced into begging when she first came through the portal into this world. +1 Charisma
- Pepper Handsome of the Lost Boys was laughed at during a party, he drank more to get through the night. Double exp from carousing if you fail vs the consequences.
- Dargo came to a marvellous feast “dressed” as the guest of honour and indulged himself mightily. +2 to reaction rolls at large social events.
- Red was saved from a pit by one of her spider-brothers. You may grant people next to you a reroll to prevent falling.
- Zulu Snakebite was forced into begging when she first came through the portal into this world. +1 Charisma
- Pepper Handsome of the Lost Boys was laughed at during a party, he drank more to get through the night. Double exp from carousing if you fail vs the consequences.
- Dargo came to a marvellous feast “dressed” as the guest of honour and indulged himself mightily. +2 to reaction rolls at large social events.
- Red was saved from a pit by one of her spider-brothers. You may grant people next to you a reroll to prevent falling.
Overland Exploration:
- Explored a couple of hexes (100 exp)
- First party to behold the site of the Crashed Spaceship (500 exp)
Total: 600 exp
- Explored a couple of hexes (100 exp)
- First party to behold the site of the Crashed Spaceship (500 exp)
Total: 600 exp
Loot:
- A foam gun
- A sackful of microwaves (1000 exp)
Total: 1000 exp
- A sackful of microwaves (1000 exp)
Total: 1000 exp
Foes:
- A proto-elephant (750 exp)
- A flock of drones (375 exp)
- A space marine (50 exp)
Total: 1175 exp
- A flock of drones (375 exp)
- A space marine (50 exp)
Total: 1175 exp
Events:
--- A Rude Awakening
- A great trumpeting sound! Waking quickly from strange dreams of crabs and trucks, the party tumble out of their tents and into a combat against a great beast - Andromeda’s proto-elephant “friend” who has broken free of her vampiric mind control!
- Battle is joined, the great beast attacks Andromeda with its great tusks! She’s thrown back and suddenly Dustin Johnson is there, stumbling out of his tent hung with hotboxed meat and breathing out a great cloud of chiiiiill.
- In the ensuing calm, the party notices that Ratman the Ratman has returned with an army of rats. He calmly crawls onto the elephant’s back and puts gentle paws over its eyes. They toss some friendly ropes over the elephant to lash a friendly blanket to its friendly back. The resulting wrestle is completely unfriendly and ineffective!
- A great trumpeting sound! Waking quickly from strange dreams of crabs and trucks, the party tumble out of their tents and into a combat against a great beast - Andromeda’s proto-elephant “friend” who has broken free of her vampiric mind control!
- Battle is joined, the great beast attacks Andromeda with its great tusks! She’s thrown back and suddenly Dustin Johnson is there, stumbling out of his tent hung with hotboxed meat and breathing out a great cloud of chiiiiill.
- In the ensuing calm, the party notices that Ratman the Ratman has returned with an army of rats. He calmly crawls onto the elephant’s back and puts gentle paws over its eyes. They toss some friendly ropes over the elephant to lash a friendly blanket to its friendly back. The resulting wrestle is completely unfriendly and ineffective!
- Grumpy charges, headbutts, and is knocked the fuck out. Zulu charges, headbutts, and knocks the elephant the fuck out!
- The beast collapses, defeated, and Andromeda immediately feasts upon its unconscious body. Her body swells up horrifically like a massive mosquito. The others dump unneeded gear at the camp and prepare to move off towards the crashed spaceship to the east. Dargo and Ratman plot evil science.
- Near the edge of the jungle Grumpy suddenly awakes! He looks around and suddenly runs back to camp to grab his gear! Thank goodness nobody touched it!
--- The Hunters
- When he returns the others are looking out over the tall swaying grasses of the savannah. To the south they can see several figures walking. To the north something scurries through the grass. Andromeda directs the party north to see what the creature is.
- Zulu realises that she’s gaining Santa powers - implying it’s December outside the Dino-Dome - and detects that the creature to the north is mostly Nice but occasionally flicks over to Naughty.
- They reach the running figure and discover it’s a Styx! He wears a battered top hat and a raggedy once-fancy suit and he’s on the run from some vampires. Recent events have made him unable to re-upload to the Styxmind, so he’s rapidly having to come to terms with his mortality.
- Andromeda spots a bat flapping in the air some way away, so turns into a bat herself to talk! After some difficult free-fall conversation, they land below and Andromeda meets the three vampires who tell her they plan to turn Styx into a vampire and control him. She bursts their bubble by telling them goblins can’t be turned - they’re technically vegetables so don’t have blood.
- Near the edge of the jungle Grumpy suddenly awakes! He looks around and suddenly runs back to camp to grab his gear! Thank goodness nobody touched it!
--- The Hunters
- When he returns the others are looking out over the tall swaying grasses of the savannah. To the south they can see several figures walking. To the north something scurries through the grass. Andromeda directs the party north to see what the creature is.
- Zulu realises that she’s gaining Santa powers - implying it’s December outside the Dino-Dome - and detects that the creature to the north is mostly Nice but occasionally flicks over to Naughty.
- They reach the running figure and discover it’s a Styx! He wears a battered top hat and a raggedy once-fancy suit and he’s on the run from some vampires. Recent events have made him unable to re-upload to the Styxmind, so he’s rapidly having to come to terms with his mortality.
- Andromeda spots a bat flapping in the air some way away, so turns into a bat herself to talk! After some difficult free-fall conversation, they land below and Andromeda meets the three vampires who tell her they plan to turn Styx into a vampire and control him. She bursts their bubble by telling them goblins can’t be turned - they’re technically vegetables so don’t have blood.
- Gar’rath, the original bat, flies up again to see if the Styx has gone far and is suddenly pierced by a beam from a beam rifle! The other vampires reveal they’re being hunted themselves! Andromeda gets out of there, staying low through the grass in wolf form, and rejoins the others. By the time she gets back the Styx is gone, and Dargo is complaining about how it would have been nice to eat him.
--- War!
- The party head towards the sparkling plume of red smoke of the crash site, sticking to a stand of scrubby trees to avoid getting targeted by whatever’s shooting up the vampires, and find themselves at the edge of a war zone!
- Zulu’s Naughty/Nice vision picks up a group of Naughty entities moving closer, followed by another group designated Nice. It’s a group of “Space Marines” with jump packs, followed by a cloud of whirring quad-copter drones! What’s going on?
- Zulu exits cover and flags down the space marines, and is told by one mustachio’d man that there’s a war on. Humans versus Mod Cons! The drones are Mod Con enemies! The space marines jump onwards to attack the Mod Con rear, leaving the party to deal with the drones!
- Most of the drones peel off to attack the party and DJ uses the last of his Faith to chill them out! While the drones chill, Andromeda and others look to see where the space marines went. They look down into the scar left by the crashed ship and smashed open containers and living machines scattered about! The space marines are leaping about, blasting hardening foam at the living Mod Cons to keep them down.
- Around the drones, Red steps to the fore next to Ratman with his horde of rats. With a great sweep of her hand Red chucks a whole load of them onto the drones! The vermin nibble at the drones’ plastic carapaces even as they swoop down to slash past her with their whirring rotors.
- The others resolve to save the Mod Cons! There’s a container of microwaves and another of floating light bulbs, plus two containers piled high with heated bidet toilet seats. Zulu tosses her expandable Santa sack to Andromeda so she can save the microwaves, while DJ goes to defend the bidets!
- The space marines jump around easily with their jump packs, foaming up appliances and party members with impunity. Getting hit with a foam weapon slows you, if not binding you up entirely!
- The party head towards the sparkling plume of red smoke of the crash site, sticking to a stand of scrubby trees to avoid getting targeted by whatever’s shooting up the vampires, and find themselves at the edge of a war zone!
- Zulu’s Naughty/Nice vision picks up a group of Naughty entities moving closer, followed by another group designated Nice. It’s a group of “Space Marines” with jump packs, followed by a cloud of whirring quad-copter drones! What’s going on?
- Zulu exits cover and flags down the space marines, and is told by one mustachio’d man that there’s a war on. Humans versus Mod Cons! The drones are Mod Con enemies! The space marines jump onwards to attack the Mod Con rear, leaving the party to deal with the drones!
- Most of the drones peel off to attack the party and DJ uses the last of his Faith to chill them out! While the drones chill, Andromeda and others look to see where the space marines went. They look down into the scar left by the crashed ship and smashed open containers and living machines scattered about! The space marines are leaping about, blasting hardening foam at the living Mod Cons to keep them down.
- Around the drones, Red steps to the fore next to Ratman with his horde of rats. With a great sweep of her hand Red chucks a whole load of them onto the drones! The vermin nibble at the drones’ plastic carapaces even as they swoop down to slash past her with their whirring rotors.
- The others resolve to save the Mod Cons! There’s a container of microwaves and another of floating light bulbs, plus two containers piled high with heated bidet toilet seats. Zulu tosses her expandable Santa sack to Andromeda so she can save the microwaves, while DJ goes to defend the bidets!
- The space marines jump around easily with their jump packs, foaming up appliances and party members with impunity. Getting hit with a foam weapon slows you, if not binding you up entirely!
- Zulu uses her grapnel gun to zip towards one of them and defeats him in glorious combat atop a container, seizing his weapon but also noticing that his skin below the neck is covered in cancerous growths.
- DJ, out of faith, uses the toilet seats to assist him in jumping up to attack passing space marines until he actually manages to grab one! The sticky foam binds them together! He triggers the enemy’s jump pack as they struggle and they zip off out of the combat, where DJ discovers that his enemy is both attractive and amorous...
- Andromeda sees that Red has fallen on the rise, assaulted by countless waves of drones. She leaves the microwaves in the sack for now, ignoring their scared dinging, and bolts up the slope to save Red with a powerful lightning Sacrifice attack!
- Dargo grabs the newly enervated Red from the ground and wields her like a club in his massive mutant hand! The drones attack and Dargo breaks his shield defending them, then counterattacks with his human weapon. Red laughs as she strikes through the damaged drones in a single swishing arc, unsure to this day which one of them was truly doing the cleaving.
- Amongst the Mod Cons, more space marines arrive from the opposite side of the crash scar. One of them rides a pachycephalosaurus and bears a passing resemblance to the deceased Lulu Spiderbite. Her marines wield different weapons to the others, strange and silvery.
- The Lost Boys move into a defensive position against this new force, protecting their flanks between two large containers… until one of them begins floating into the air! Grumpy has persuaded the floating lightbulbs to float, lifting the huge box nearly 10’ off the ground!
- The risen container tricks the dino-rider, who charges under the container in her pursuit of Grumpy! He stands atop the container, glaive glowing with superheated runes, ready to strike.
- Another marine blasts the Lost Boys with a wide-barrelled device that bathes them in warm green light, many Extras keel over covered in raw red radiation burns.
- Up the rise, two people wielding strange staves unleash a magical assault. Mages! They both release Chaos Bursts as they cast, heedless of the risks!
- We pause for the night in the middle of combat. Find out the exciting conclusion next week in D&D!!!
- DJ, out of faith, uses the toilet seats to assist him in jumping up to attack passing space marines until he actually manages to grab one! The sticky foam binds them together! He triggers the enemy’s jump pack as they struggle and they zip off out of the combat, where DJ discovers that his enemy is both attractive and amorous...
- Andromeda sees that Red has fallen on the rise, assaulted by countless waves of drones. She leaves the microwaves in the sack for now, ignoring their scared dinging, and bolts up the slope to save Red with a powerful lightning Sacrifice attack!
- Dargo grabs the newly enervated Red from the ground and wields her like a club in his massive mutant hand! The drones attack and Dargo breaks his shield defending them, then counterattacks with his human weapon. Red laughs as she strikes through the damaged drones in a single swishing arc, unsure to this day which one of them was truly doing the cleaving.
- Amongst the Mod Cons, more space marines arrive from the opposite side of the crash scar. One of them rides a pachycephalosaurus and bears a passing resemblance to the deceased Lulu Spiderbite. Her marines wield different weapons to the others, strange and silvery.
- The Lost Boys move into a defensive position against this new force, protecting their flanks between two large containers… until one of them begins floating into the air! Grumpy has persuaded the floating lightbulbs to float, lifting the huge box nearly 10’ off the ground!
- The risen container tricks the dino-rider, who charges under the container in her pursuit of Grumpy! He stands atop the container, glaive glowing with superheated runes, ready to strike.
- Another marine blasts the Lost Boys with a wide-barrelled device that bathes them in warm green light, many Extras keel over covered in raw red radiation burns.
- Up the rise, two people wielding strange staves unleash a magical assault. Mages! They both release Chaos Bursts as they cast, heedless of the risks!
- We pause for the night in the middle of combat. Find out the exciting conclusion next week in D&D!!!
Total: 3000 exp
Team Bonus:
- Aggressive Negotiations bonus
- Balls to the Wall bonus
- Best of Intentions bonus
- Better Part of Valour bonus
- Brutal Kill bonus
- Coitus boners
- Classic Charles bonus
- Diplomancy bonus
- Dramatic Battle bonus
- Dramatic Rescue bonus
- Monster Infighting bonus
- Noblebright bonus
- Pundemonium bonus
- Schindler’s bonus
- Split the Party bonus
- WWE bonus
- Balls to the Wall bonus
- Best of Intentions bonus
- Better Part of Valour bonus
- Brutal Kill bonus
- Coitus boners
- Classic Charles bonus
- Diplomancy bonus
- Dramatic Battle bonus
- Dramatic Rescue bonus
- Monster Infighting bonus
- Noblebright bonus
- Pundemonium bonus
- Schindler’s bonus
- Split the Party bonus
- WWE bonus
Total: 800 exp
Individual Bonus:
- Chronicler (Carter / Grumpy - 100 exp)
- Expedition Leader (Kitty / Andromeda - 100 exp)
- Cartographer (Carter / Grumpy - 100 exp)
- Paymaster (Charles / DJ - 100 exp)
- Quartermaster (Ollie / Zulu - 100 exp)
- Expedition Leader (Kitty / Andromeda - 100 exp)
- Cartographer (Carter / Grumpy - 100 exp)
- Paymaster (Charles / DJ - 100 exp)
- Quartermaster (Ollie / Zulu - 100 exp)
- Vanguard (Russell / Dargo - 100 exp)
- Triage (Carter / Grumpy - 100 exp)
- Chef (George / Lost Boys - 100 exp)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Kitty, Charles, Izzy, Timothy - 500 exp ea.)
- Khorne Kernel bonus (Izzy - 200 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Ollie, Charles - 100 exp ea.)
- Triage (Carter / Grumpy - 100 exp)
- Chef (George / Lost Boys - 100 exp)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Kitty, Charles, Izzy, Timothy - 500 exp ea.)
- Khorne Kernel bonus (Izzy - 200 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Ollie, Charles - 100 exp ea.)
Exp Totals:
- Kitty / Andromeda, Level 7 Andromedan Vampire: 97858 (Level up at 144000)
- Charles / Dustin Johnson, Level 7 Intergalacticist Cleric: 97561 (Level up at 112000)
- Carter / Granite "Grumpy" Ironjaw, Level 7 Warden Dwarf: 85632 (Level up at 140800)
- Tim / Red, Level 7 Duellist Fighter: 67658 (Level up at 128000)
- Ollie / Zulu Snakebite, Level 7 Barbarian: 65107 (Level up at 128000)
- Russell / Dargo, Level 6 Inheritor: 61612 (Level up at 72000)
- George / The New Moondin Lost Boys, Level 6 Extras: 43010 (Level up at 48000)
- Izzy / Ratman, Level 6 Ratman: 33145 (Level up at 48000)
