Session 80 - Just Keep Slurping Out Of That Fountain That's Right Boys

Session 80 - Just Keep Slurping Out Of That Fountain That's Right Boys
Campaign Date:

Wednesday, 03 December, 1549
Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous
Zodiac: Ophiuchus

New Characters:- Nash, a leatherworker turned to a life of adventure. 

Enemies Defeated:
- I think actually... nothing?

- I suppose "befriending" that undead dwarf counts! (50 exp)
Total: 50 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- 12 long-fingered yellow-stained claws

- A suit of self-assembling armour

- A kazoo

- 1 brass roman-style crown of leaves (1 exp)

- Some chunks of a big lumpy rock

- 7 red gems from the foreheads of dwarf statues (1400 exp)

Total: 1401 exp

Exploration:
- Travelled 132 miles (440 exp)

- Entered the Rune Dungeon (100 exp)

- Explored 9 dungeon rooms (180 exp)

- 1 secret door found (50 exp)

Total: 130 exp

Events:

- Finally back to safety, Lulu turns up somewhat plumper and a Leatherworker decides to join the crew. (50 exp)

- Following a mysterious mental pull in Jain's head, the party heads to Fate in order to grab Lulu's longship. (50 exp)

- On the way the scene of a battle is found. The yellowed claws of the gaunt slain creatures are taken in case they're useful. (50 exp)
- Reaching the river, the water is full of weirdness which gets worse as you travel upstream. (50 exp)

- The ship is parked up and a trip through the mountains begins. While travelling up a little-used path the party come across Gifflewim, some weird merchant guy who the party have fucked over previously. (50 exp)

- He refuses to deal with anybody but the newbies, and by proxy Lulu trades Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer for a suit of self-assembling armour and a presumably-magical kazoo. (50 exp)

- The party get to the entrance of the Dwarf dungeon some of them have seen before, but this time they have Jain's psychic mind-pull thing going! (50 exp)

- The entrance is marked with the symbol a sort of Dwarf version of Satan, purple smoke billows out of the entrance when opened, it's very ominous. (50 exp)

- Inside, murals with a fair amount of interesting interplay between Dwarfs and other races, purple smoke, apparently recently deceased Dwarfs and humans. (50 exp)

- Due to the shenanigans of a previous group of players, the secret door to the rear is open. Jain's direction sense takes her through. (50 exp)

- Past some fountains (whose water is collected by some) and down a grand walkway is a beach. Great girders stretch upwards out of torch range (50 exp)

- While Lulu climbs one structure, others explore, finding a weird sort of submarine attached to a cable going upwards (50 exp)

- Lulu reaches the top, discovering the gantry and control box of a crane. She sees a figure inside the control box, but luckily she was prophesied to "make a friend with a coin trick" and makes the vacant Dwarf within non-aggressive towards her. (50 exp)

- He doesn't speak but that's ok. Lulu gets to ground level with him in tow, finding the others have worked out how the submarine works in the mean time. (50 exp)

- Sparky chucks his cat out into the water where it is sucked down a giant whirlpool and horribly drowned and broken. Luckily it's his familiar so it can't actually die. (50 exp)

- Without the dwarf in the control box the submarine can be operated from the inside. Basically you turn some handles to pay out the cable from the crane, and that sucks the submersible into the whirlpool and sucks it down a huge pipe into a large pool far below. (50 exp)

- This happens. (50 exp)

- Sparky retrieves his cat as the submarine bobs about in the lower pool, floating to another beach far below with convenient stone dwarf statues to tie up on. (50 exp)

- The dwarf statues have gems in their foreheads which are, of course, stolen. Lulu looks at them through her former-life-detector device and sees they were all once living dwarfs. (50 exp)

- Avoiding anything of potential danger, the party follows Jain through a long long tunnel with glowing rune-covered arches every hundred metres or so. (50 exp)

- Very eventually the party reach the end, finding a room with glowing runes that match the magic torch Lulu's has for a long long time now. (50 exp)

- Several black obelisks have obsidian-boned skeleton standing in front of them. The skeletons collapse when their obelisks have light shed on them. (50 exp)

- The next room has a glyph in the floor that goes off like a flashbang when someone steps into the room and scuffs it. Experimentation ensues. (50 exp)

- A corridor is followed and there is, amazingly, a dude behind a door at the end. He is eventually persuaded that the party isn't made of clay and lets them in past his swelled-shut door. (50 exp)

- He has a book on glyphs he stole from somewhere, and so Wolfgang punches it with his newly-acquired Bookspeak spell which was very convenient to have. The book tells the party what all the different types of runes are which is nice. (50 exp)

- The dude decides to sort of hang around muttering, and the party continue, coming across a sort of rune-based weighing scale puzzle. When it is solved, the platform raises up to an upper door and also opens a secret door on the lower level. (50 exp)

- Inside, a chamber with a fountain and shallow bowls. The fountain is naturally drunk from, granting stat increases (yay!) followed by mutations on subsequent sips. Things get crazy before we end the session there, you'll have to see the mutations for yourself. (50 exp)

Total: 1350 exp

Misc:
- Diplomacy bonus (50 exp)
- Hard Bargain bonus (50 exp)
- Operator as Fuck bonus (50 exp)
- PETA bonus (50 exp)
- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)

- Party Treasurer bonus (Jain Doe - 100 exp)

- Mutatis Mutandis bonus (Lulu, Sparky, Jain - 100 exp ea.)

Total: 250 exp + bonuses

Rumours:
- Some sort of strange spider society controls the towns around Dwimmermount, growing ever stronger.
- I've seen zombies shrug off wounds that would kill the toughest man! They're unstoppable!
- The rats gnawing on the flesh and bones of the dead are growing to enormous size
- The Bishop of Galth was attacked a few weeks ago! Those present say there was a sound like a great bell and his assailants were sent fleeing while shrieking praises to Eris and the Dead God!

- That group of demon hunters the Fated King pardoned? They went up Mt Death Frost. Some say to kill the Necromancer Overlord... others say it is to join him.
- There are farmers out there who survive in spite of the Dead. I know the Rodbroks, at least, fortified their farm before the hordes closed in. I've no idea how they fare now, of course.
- The yellow-clawed monsters can stop a man's heart cold with a single touch!

Death Toll and Injuries:
- None! Except for a particularly bedraggled cat.

[[]]

Exp Totals:
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 6 Fighter: 48793 (Level up at 64000)

Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 5 Barbarian: 27538 (Level up at 32000)

Kyle / Jain Doe, Level 5 Dwarf: 17791 (Level up at 35200)
*DING!* +1d10 HP! +Lorebond!
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 4 Muscle Wizard: 13257 (Level up at 18000)

Oliver R / Wolfgang Brown Grylls, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 3337 (Level up at 4500)
Tom / Sparky, Level 1 Magic User: 1945 (Level up at 2250)

Daniel / Nash, Level 1 Fighter: 455 (Level up at 2000)

Absent or Retired:

Charles / Zan, Spermling of Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 4169 (Level up at 7000)

Sarah / Mana, Level 4 Specialist (Thief): 13447 (Level up at 24000)

Jim / Jim's Fighter, Level 1 Fighter: 241 (Level up at 2000)

Louis / Louis' Next Character, Level 1 ???: 2062 (Level up at ???)
Oliver R / Osar, Level 2 Specialist (Dabbler): 661 (Level up at 3000)
Charlie / Le Chaz III, Level 1 Cleric: 670 (Level up at 1750)
David / Theras, Level 5 Specialist (Assassin): 13422 (Level up at 24000)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 5 Halfling: 28949 (Level up at 32000)

Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 19863 (Level up at 36000)

James / Quarion, Level 3 Elf (Gremling): 7947 (Level up at 12000)

Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)

Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)

Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)

Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)

Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)

John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)

Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)

Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)

??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)

Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)

Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)

Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)

Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)

Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)

Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)

Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)

Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)

Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)

-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.

Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)

Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)

Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)

Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)

-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar

Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)

Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)

Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)

Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)

Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)

Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)

Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)

Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)

Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)

Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)

Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)

Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)

Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)

Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)

Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)

Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)

Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)

rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)

Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)

Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)

Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)

Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)

Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)

John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)

Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)

-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)

Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)

Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)

Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)

Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)

George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)

Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)

Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)

Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)

Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)

Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)

Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)

Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)

Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)

--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 74 - Telenovellas and Horrible Terrors

This session marks a sad occasion - Mariana is flying back to Portugal, maybe forever. Stay in touch! You and Joe Joe shall be missed!

Next session is the last session of the year since I'll be in Iceland (two-for-one-pizzas-harr-harr) and then embroiled in Christmas stuff as we approach the end of the year. I am going to assume that 5th January will be our next session for now, if anything changes I'll let you know.
We'll also be back in the Mad Hatter next year (yay!) so less mucking about in noisy pubs.

We (or rather, Charles) are organising something laser quest-related for this Monday, so contact somebody via these emails or Facebook if you're interested!

Over and out.

Session 74 - Telenovellas and Horrible Terrors

Campaign Date:
Sunday, 27 November, 1549
Moon Phase: Waxing Gibbous
Zodiac: Scorpio

Enemies Defeated:
- A shapeshifting monster, sliced to pieces by Stabbington (250 exp)

- Joe Joe's parent's murderer, life ruined (100 exp)
Total: 350 exp

Treasure and Equipment:- Assorted arms and armour of an ancient design in fine condition, less effective than modern arms and armour but potentially valuable to history buffs (400 exp)

- A diary detailing the sordid details of the life a small-town Halfling.
Total: 400 exp

Exploration:
- Travelled 150 miles or so (500 exp)
- 7 dungeon rooms explored (140 exp)

- First party member to enter the hidden Halfling village of Gullypuddle (100 exp)
Total: 740 exp

Events:
- Flew brass bell to Fate via giant eagle, most healed up while Stabbington and Mana went to see Slim Jimmy (50 exp)

- Slim Jimmy agreed to fence bell for cut of profits, bell shifted under cover of night. Profits used mostly to pay off Stabbington's significant debt. Remainder split. (50 exp)

- Manager of Stabbington's company gives him a map to a Dwarven dungeon of ominous import. (50 exp)

- Joe Joe drops some boulders carved with threatening messages in front of Slim Jimmy's house then flies the team to Gifflewim's shop, only to find it already ransacked. Townsfolk say he suddenly up and left town a few days ago without even saying goodbye. (50 exp)

- The party fly on eagleback to the dungeon entrance, then Joe Joe flies off to her home town. The session splits. (50 exp)
Inside the Dungeon:

- The main group enter to discover strange swirling purple smoke around their ankles and ornately carved halls. (50 exp)

- A room containing well preserved old robes, sandals, arms and armour is entered through a door containing a Hammer-and-Compasses symbol. (50 exp)

- In a large hall are many preserved bodies. Some armed humans, most unarmed Dwarfs. On the walls are murals of Dwarvish history. A few bodies are dragged outside for whatever reason. (50 exp)

- At the end of the hall, an empty altar that once contained several items, a big boulder, a Dwarfish inscription over the back wall saying "We Walk in the Right". (50 exp)

- Walking to the right, the party reach a library containing many stone Dwarfish tomes. Jane Doe has a cheeky read and finds out a bunch of stuff. (50 exp)

- Entering another room, the walls are layered rune-carved shells, looking through the runes cut into the shell allows you to see deeper layers. In a pool of water, gems! (50 exp)

- Testing of the gems reveals they are more glittering holes in the fabric of space-time than actual jewels. Jumurak's pickaxe crawls with white light. (50 exp)

- In the next room, battle ensues when a strange colour-shifting monster is poked. It reforms and changes round to round. (50 exp)
- In the fighting, Mana's weapons and armour break so she bogs off to the next room to check down a hole, seeing a pile of something sparking below. Dropping stuff has no effect. (50 exp)

- The shapeshifter is finally defeated after Jumurak passes out punching it and Stabbington lays in with a 5-hit combo, it bursts in a cloud of multicoloured gas. The party decides to cut their losses and leave. (50 exp)
In the Halfling village:

- Joe Joe lands impressively in the centre of the village and is greeted by the celebrating village inhabitants. (50 exp)

- She goes to see her relatives, the Grumbleberries, and is immersed once more in the tangled gossip-filled web of a Halfling village inter-familial politics. Her return has dredged up rumours that the Hogfoots were behind her parent's murder. (50 exp)

- Excusing herself from the conversation, Joe Joe necks a Shrinking potion and goes to investigate the Hogfoots. She learns that her father was originally a Hogfoot before marrying into the Grumbleberries, and clings onto the back of a chair to hear her father's sister's whispered discussion with her husband. (50 exp)

- Suspicious, Joe Joe finds their bedroom and goes through their stuff. She finds a locket with her father's face in it and a diary which contains more info, including that her father and his sister had been close as children. (50 exp)
- Despite the enmity between the Hogfoots and the Grumbleberries, Joe Joe's father and mother got married. This cut him off from the Hogfoots, and his sister, forever. In an attempt to get him back the sister bribed a human man to kill Joe Joe's mother. The price - mind-controlling the woman the man loved into being his loving wife. Unfortunately something went horribly wrong during the hit and he killed them both, fleeing into the night and leaving only the bracelet that Joe Joe now wears. (50 exp)

- With this inflammatory text in tow, Joe Joe concocts a plan to tell the whole town without being found guilty of the heinous crime of diary-theft. At her Welcome Home Feast she leaves the diary somewhere that an elder of the Longshank family, neutral in the Grumbleberry-Proudfoot feud, can find it by "accident". (50 exp)

- He reads it (acceptable by diary-windfall laws) and discovers the truth. In front of the whole town he shames Joe Joe's aunt and she is condemned. The punishment - partial lobotomy followed by mind-slavery until death. Joe Joe shows pity and decides she should instead have a choice between being disembowelled by the giant eagle or being exiled from the village. The condemned quickly agrees to exile. (50 exp)

- Joe Joe's aunt tells her where the killer still lives in a human town and they fly there. While Joe Joe confronts him, her aunt removes the mindcontrol on the killer's wife. Joe Joe leaves as the killer's life begins to fall apart. (50 exp)

- Now tired of small town politics, Joe Joe flies off on her eagle to greater adventures. (50 exp)

Total: 1150 exp

Misc:
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)

- Diplomacy bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Kill It With Fire bonus (50 exp)
- Soap Opera bonus (50 exp)

- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)

- Overkilled the tranforming monster (100 exp)
- Near Death Experience bonus (Jumurak - 100 exp)

- Party Treasurer Bonus (Jane Doe - 100 exp)
Total: 400 exp + bonuses

Active Businesses:
- Peggy Pigrider - Pie Mama's. Safe. Value: 1213sp
- John Doe the Unlucky - Anvil, Mining and Craft Company. Risky. Value: 1579sp
- Lulu Spiderbite - Clunge Honey. Safe. Value: 1357sp
- Joe Joe - Josephine's Petting Zoo. Risky. Value: 1455sp
- Stabbington Shanks - Tomb Busters. Risky. Value: 618sp (+3% value)

Rumours:
- The Fated King's withdrawn our armies from Caledonia. I fear the north is lost.

- The girl at Lamister's Roost says she knows the people who knocked over the Bloodworth Estate. Forced her to cut the keys at gunpoint they did.

- It's madness in the mountains now, Dwimmermount is spewing dark forces and strange smoky creatures stalk the passes.

- If you tattoo the Dead Sign of Duvan'Ku upon your chest you can gain entry to the city of Necromancers.

- The dark tunnels below the city contain more than vagrants and rats, the Resurrection Engine they use to raise the dead is down there too!

- Atrox Morbus might be scary and expensive, but the leech there is an expert on every disease and malady the world has ever seen!

Death Toll and Injuries:
- None!

[[]]

Exp Totals:
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 6 Fighter: 43219 (Level up at 64000)
Charles / Zea, Level 6 Cleric: 33930 (Level up at 56000)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 5 Halfling: 28949 (Level up at 32000)
Kyle / Jane Doe, Level 4 Dwarf: 14649 (Level up at 17600)
Sarah / Mana, Level 4 Specialist (Thief): 10690 (Level up at 12000)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 3 Muscle Wizard: 8195 (Level up at 9000)

Thanks-for-running-overflow:
David / Theras, Level 5 Specialist (Assassin): 13422 (Level up at 24000)

Absent or Retired:

Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 5 Barbarian: 25506 (Level up at 32000)

Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 5 Muscle Wizard: 19863 (Level up at 36000)

James / Quarion, Level 3 Elf (Gremling): 7947 (Level up at 12000)

Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)

Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)

Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)

Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)

Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)

John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)

Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)

Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)

??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)

Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)

Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)

Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)

Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)

Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)

Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)

Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)

Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)

Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)

-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.

Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)

Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)

Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)

Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)

-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar

Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)

Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)

Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)

Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)

Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)

Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)

Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)

Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)

Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)

Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)

Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)

Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)

Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)

Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)

Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)

Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)

Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)

rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)

Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)

Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)

Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)

Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)

Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)

John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)

Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)

-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)

Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)

Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)

Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)

Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)

George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)

Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)

Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)

Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)

Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)

Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)

Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)

Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)

Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)

--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 23 - You didn't have to roooll so loooow

Well I'm glad I give you all this bonus exp for stuff other than murder and theft.

Still, the Banes are down here in this dungeon, and the rune dungeon has all sorts of fun stuff for you to use and abuse next session.

After totting it all up Crocell had 7980/8000 exp which made me laugh, I gave you an attempted suicide bonus to push you over the edge.

It hasn't been a good few days for poor Peggy, first her pig gets exploded by a fractal butterfly, then her long-loyal retainers got pulled apart by walking dwarf skins.
For posterity - the main cool thing about that fountain room was that the wandering dwarfs from the main hall couldn't follow you down there... but you sucked them all into a black hole already so you never found out!
And for Mr Mushroom Lover - It is the night of the new moon tomorrow, but you won't regain your spells unless you can get to the surface and cavort elfily in the moonlight. You'll have to make do underground for now.


Session 23 - You didn't have to roooll so loooow

Campaign date:
Saturday, May 14th 1549
Moon phase: Waning Crescent

Enemies defeated:
- 6 hollow dwarves, popped eventually after a storm of poor rolls, one of them up a big crane (150 exp)

Treasure and Equipment:
- Various chainmail and extra shields and weapons and stuff looted from that one room (500 exp)

Exploration:
- 6 dungeon rooms explored (60 exp)
- First party to enter level 2 of the dungeon (200 exp)
- Discovered the entrance to the Rune Dungeon (100 exp)

Misc:

- Made the submarine safe for use (50 exp)

- Successfully operated the submarine (50 exp)
- ...without everyone dying from mad jostling (50 exp)
- Long deliberation bonus (50 exp)
- Got a mouthful of madness mold (50 exp)

- Sat in the symbols (50 exp)

- Died in your imagination (50 exp - Peggy)

- Attempted suicide bonus (50 exp - Crocell)

Quests and Rumours:
- None down here

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Socks, ripped asunder by three hollow dwarfs at once
- Trevor, also eaten by a hollow dwarf
- Tub, sucked into a black hole somewhere between here and salvation.

Exp Totals:
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 3 Dwarf: 9705 (Level up at 17,600)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 2 Specialist: 2502 (Level up at 3000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 8030 (Level up at 16000)

*DING!* +1d6 HP! +2 to saves! +1 to Bushcraft! +1 to domination attempts!

Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1157 (Level up at 2250)
Renzo / Mushroom Lover, Level 2 Elf (Alpdrucke): 5510 (Level up at 6000)

[[]]

Recovering:
Tom / Olaf Tenderloin, Level 2 Dwarf: 2737 (Level up at 4400) ETA: 27 weeks
Tom / Baron Noel Pompadour, Level 1 Specialist: 1223 (Level up at 1500) ETA: 13 weeks

Absent or Retired:
Michael / Mist Urman, Level 3 Magic User: 4976 (Level up at 4500)
--- Stan, Level 0 Mercenary. (takes 1/5 of a share)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
--- Faust, Level 1 Specialist: 823 (Level up at 1500)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / Eli, Level 1 Cleric: 409 (Level up at 1750)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 22 - Read ALL THE BOOKS! Grab ALL THE GEMS!

You know, I didn't realise how valuable those golden tools were until I checked and hoo boy you should be glad you picked them up! You both levelled. Welcome to level 4, Peggy. You are now the highest level out of everyone.

And run, Tub, run like the wind! I hope you find what you're looking for while being pursued by a slow but inevitable black hole.

Session 22 - Read ALL THE BOOKS! Grab ALL THE GEMS!

Campaign date:
Saturday, May 13th 1549
Moon phase: Waning Crescent

New characters:
- Gadling, thief turned... thief?

Enemies defeated:
- 7 hollow dwarves, variously stabbed, sliced, popped like balloons, and sucked into a black hole (125 exp)
- A firey slug, kicked into a bottomless chasm (Gadling - 100 exp)
- Neutralised the source of the hollow dwarfs (500 exp)

Treasure and Equipment:
- Finely worked golden hammer (2500 exp)
- Finely worked golden pickaxe (2500 exp)
- Golden beard-trimmers (250 exp)
- Super sexy three-breasted alien lady (thrown into miniature black hole -  gone forever)
- A miniature sun (thrown into miniature black hole - gone forever)

Exploration:
- 9 dungeon rooms explored (90 exp)
- 2 wandering monsters (20 exp)
- Secret door found (10 exp)

Misc:
- Grabbed a bunch of wormhole gems (50 exp)
- Got rid of the purple smoke (50 exp)
- "Solved" the meteorite door (50 exp)
- Read aaaaall 100 books (Peggy - 200 exp)
- Read the rune walls (50 exp)
- Split the party bonus (50 exp)
- Near death experience bonus (Gadling - 100 exp)

Quests and Rumours:
- Sooo many stone books on dwarven history. You should ask Peggy about them.

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Fred the Pig, detonated from within by a fractal butterfly (I am really really sorry)
- Tub, currently running as fast as possible away from a motile black hole (I'm putting him down under "Recovering")

Exp Totals:
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 3 Dwarf: 9403 (Level up at 17,600)

*DING!* +1d10 HP! +2 to saves! +1 to architecture skill!

--- Socks, Level 0 Human
--- Trevor, Level 0 Human
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 2 Specialist: 2250 (Level up at 1500)

*DING!* +1d6 HP +2 skill points!

[[]]

Recovering:
Tom / Olaf Tenderloin, Level 2 Dwarf: 2737 (Level up at 4400) ETA: 27 weeks
Tom / Baron Noel Pompadour, Level 1 Specialist: 1223 (Level up at 1500) ETA: 13 weeks
Chris2 / Tub, Level 2 Goblin: 3671 (Level up at 4000) ETA: However long it takes to outrun a black hole.

Absent or Retired:
Chris / Crocell, Level 3 Halfling: 7738 (Level up at 8000)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 905 (Level up at 2250)
Michael / Mist Urman, Level 3 Magic User: 4976 (Level up at 4500)
--- Stan, Level 0 Mercenary. (takes 1/5 of a share)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Renzo / Mushroom Lover, Level 2 Elf (Alpdrucke): 5258 (Level up at 6000)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
--- Faust, Level 1 Specialist: 823 (Level up at 1500)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / Eli, Level 1 Cleric: 409 (Level up at 1750)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 21 - To Boldly Go Where No DM Has Prepped Before

So close to levelling for most of you I'm so sorry.

Turns out those leaping brain guzzler things were even more brutal in my original notes so you lucked out. Two attacks per round holy moly.

We have a new girl - Lisa with a single i - so conveniently I don't have to do a Chris/Chris2 thing. She's a wizard who can speak to books.

You've found the entrance to whatever you want to call this dungeon. It's the Dwarf Satan Dungeon in my notes but I guess I should call it the Lost Tomb of the Old Miner or something to make it sound more mysterious.

Bella and Tub explored into it a little way without you guys before bugging out due to the bar closing down and also getting a bit scared. They saw some interesting pictorial lore which I'm sure they can tell you about and stole some nice quality daggers and cloaks and stuff though. Lots of purple smoke.

What did you do/are you doing with the horse and carts by the way?

A girl from my office looked over my shoulder and saw me write this so she wants to come to D&D now.
"I want to be a magic elf". Easy enough!

Liisa has finally named her one-legged dwarf - Peggy. Very fitting. She has also put a saddle on Fred the Pig who they have discovered has a peculiar mold-based condition that only effects him in human form.

Pictured is a high quality prosthetic leg from the 1500's which Peggy paid good money for!

Also attached for Peggy/Liisa is the dwarf Lorebonds list. You can pick any of the tier 1 abilities, and at level 6 you can bump it to tier 2 or choose a new tier 1 ability etc etc. See you all next time!

Session 21 - To Boldly Go Where No DM Has Prepped Before

Campaign date:
Saturday, May 9th 1549
Moon phase: Third Quarter

New characters:
- Bella, Huntress turned tattooed Wizard (Lisa)
- Not a new character, but Liisa's dwarf has been named Peggy the Pigrider

Enemies defeated:
- 3 horrible infested deer, shanked and stabbed to death. (225 exp)

Treasure and Equipment:
- From Robert Doyle for killing the Black Knight - 100 lbs of turnips, 2 rams, 4 ewes, 2 acres of land (freehold)
- From Father McKenzie for killing the Goat of the Woods - 17gp, 45sp, 112cp
- Peggy collected earnings from Pie Mama's
- Various stuff purchased on your travels, including a peg leg for Peggy and a saddle for her pig.
- Accountant hired by Peggy in Pillartown to handle transactions.
- A cart and horses.
- Some cloaks and daggers (Tub and Bella - 20 exp split)

Exploration:
- Travelled approx 96 miles (160 exp)
- 2 randoms encountered (20 exp)
- First party to enter Gush (500 exp)
- Beheld the entrance to the Dwarf Satan Dungeon (100 exp)
- Entered the Dwarf Satan Dungeon (Bella and Tub - 100 exp split)
- Explored 2 rooms (Bella and Tub - 20 exp split)
- Uncovered some of the backstory of the dungeon (Bella and Tub - 50 exp split)

Misc:
- Fame increase bonus (50 exp)
- Selfless charity bonus (Crocell - 100 exp)
- Adventuring group named "Dead Man's Guild - sponsored by Pie Mama's". (50 exp)
- Bella caroused (800 exp)
- Crocell caroused (1600 exp)
- Peggy caroused (3200 exp)
- Tub caroused (1200 exp)

Quests and Rumours:
- "The demons that besieged Wurzberg are now turning north again! They must have been repelled by the prince-bishop, or  got what they came for..."
- "If you see tracks of soft and loamy earth, those are the routes the moles take to hide their treasures."
- "There are armoured soldiers of Moldus Vane wandering the Forest of Moondine. They can keep you safe for a price."
- "If you see yellow mold, don't touch it. Its choking spores are a deadly poison."
- "Those mold men all worship horrible black goats. I heard them talking last night outside my house."

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Orthos the Short-Lived, brain guzzled

Exp Totals:
Chris / Crocell, Level 3 Halfling: 7738 (Level up at 8000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 3 Dwarf: 6600 (Level up at 4400)
*DING!* +1d12 HP! +Choice of Dwarven Lorebond!
--- Fred, Level 0 Pig
--- Socks, Level 0 Human
--- Trevor, Level 0 Human
 Chris2 / Tub, Level 2 Goblin: 3671 (Level up at 4000)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 905 (Level up at 2250)

[[]]

Recovering:
Tom / Olaf Tenderloin, Level 2 Dwarf: 2737 (Level up at 4400) ETA: 27 weeks
Tom / Baron Noel Pompadour, Level 1 Specialist: 1223 (Level up at 1500) ETA: 13 weeks

Absent or Retired:
Michael / Mist Urman, Level 3 Magic User: 4976 (Level up at 4500)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Renzo / Mushroom Lover, Level 2 Elf (Alpdrucke): 5258 (Level up at 6000)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
--- Faust, Level 1 Specialist: 823 (Level up at 1500)
(Mist's retainer)
--- Stan, Level 0 Mercenary. (takes 1/5 of a share)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / Eli, Level 1 Cleric: 409 (Level up at 1750)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human
That one guy / Nadriel, Level 1 Barbarian: 293 (Level up at 2000)
That other guy / ???, Level 1 Fighter: 293 (Level up at 2000)