Date: 25 July, 22 p.p.
Moon: First Quarter
Zenith: The Allfather
Events:
--- INT: Dungeon
- Somewhere under the mysterious pyramid on the edge of the Drudge Wastes, our heroes are sitting in a stone-walled bedroom eating leftovers from a tupperware.
- Odo Grumblebelch, a female dwarf though you wouldn't know it by looking at her, has found some dead rats under one of the beds. They've got green slime around the gums.
- Aximander, an elf of the Languid Wastrel species, has returned to a somewhat less eldritch form now that the New Moon has passed. Philipides Goath is using some of the healing magic he learned from his Cleric mentor to heal Sydney.
- Odo Grumblebelch, a female dwarf though you wouldn't know it by looking at her, has found some dead rats under one of the beds. They've got green slime around the gums.
- Aximander, an elf of the Languid Wastrel species, has returned to a somewhat less eldritch form now that the New Moon has passed. Philipides Goath is using some of the healing magic he learned from his Cleric mentor to heal Sydney.
--- A Woman??
- They set off into the dungeon proper, seeing occasional dribbles of silvery ferrofluid trickle through the intricately patterned stonework.
- Avoiding a horrible sucking sound behind one door, they try another marked with a three-fingered handprint. Inside there's a whole rec-room full of malformed clay Dwarves! They look up in interest and see... a woman!
- Several rapidly rearrange their clay faces into more handsome shapes and approach Odo, who they can tell is a woman through cultural cues. They pretend to be real pure-blood dwarves!
- Odo lures one away with her feminine wiles, and the lucky lad is taken back to the bedroom. Odo's misandrist sword strikes true, but can't kill him! His flesh starts to reknit... or would have if a pyrokinetic blast from Aximander didn't immediately turn him into a flash-baked statue!
- Sydney and Jojo immediately ask to be taught that spell, and while they bicker Odo smashes the dead dwarf open to grab the gems within! Yes, it seems these clay dwarfs contain their own loot!
- Avoiding a horrible sucking sound behind one door, they try another marked with a three-fingered handprint. Inside there's a whole rec-room full of malformed clay Dwarves! They look up in interest and see... a woman!
- Several rapidly rearrange their clay faces into more handsome shapes and approach Odo, who they can tell is a woman through cultural cues. They pretend to be real pure-blood dwarves!
- Odo lures one away with her feminine wiles, and the lucky lad is taken back to the bedroom. Odo's misandrist sword strikes true, but can't kill him! His flesh starts to reknit... or would have if a pyrokinetic blast from Aximander didn't immediately turn him into a flash-baked statue!
- Sydney and Jojo immediately ask to be taught that spell, and while they bicker Odo smashes the dead dwarf open to grab the gems within! Yes, it seems these clay dwarfs contain their own loot!
--- For Ur-Darghab!
- Odo heads back to hopefully kite out another clay dwarf... only to see that a pair of the proper giant golems have turned up and are laughing at their smaller brethren!
- They're too big to fell, so the party backtracks and tries another corridor. It's long, and they soon hear voices coming towards them! Green-toothed rats skitter by, ignoring the party, because they're being chased by dwarves!
- They're too big to fell, so the party backtracks and tries another corridor. It's long, and they soon hear voices coming towards them! Green-toothed rats skitter by, ignoring the party, because they're being chased by dwarves!
- The Dwarves have pointed ratskin hoods and dead rats on their belts, and they are momentarily baffled by the arrival of others. Luckily several people already speak the Ur-Darghab dialect and find out the dwarves are hunting rats for food.
- Jojo offers an anaesthetised bat that she found... and the bat shrieks in fear as it awakens and attacks the lead dwarf!
- Aximander takes the front with the Bow of the Ram, firing off several shots at once, while everyone else but Sydney runs in to engage. These are real dwarves, not clay copies, so attacks are plinking off their chain armour.
- Philipides takes massive damage from a cruel war-pick strike but survives, and strikes back with real anger!
- Jojo offers an anaesthetised bat that she found... and the bat shrieks in fear as it awakens and attacks the lead dwarf!
- Aximander takes the front with the Bow of the Ram, firing off several shots at once, while everyone else but Sydney runs in to engage. These are real dwarves, not clay copies, so attacks are plinking off their chain armour.
- Philipides takes massive damage from a cruel war-pick strike but survives, and strikes back with real anger!
- Jojo is doing the real damage here, big swings from her great-axe biting into the muscled sides of the Dwarves. They begin to fall.
- Odo unsheathes her second blade - the Last Sword of a Conquered Tribe - and trisects the final Dwarf as Jojo rips the jaw from his cursing mouth.
- The party gather gems from the stomachs of the dead and leave them for the rats to feast on.
- Odo unsheathes her second blade - the Last Sword of a Conquered Tribe - and trisects the final Dwarf as Jojo rips the jaw from his cursing mouth.
- The party gather gems from the stomachs of the dead and leave them for the rats to feast on.
--- Work or Die
- The noise has clearly alerted the people in the next area - a high-ceilinged hall with pillars and a whole lot of spiderwebs at the end.
- Looking up from their rats on sticks being cooked over the smoky fire, complaining about the lack of real meat for tributes lately, are a motley band of six malformed clay dwarves!
- Odo strolls in with the ol' "Hail friends!" and they immediately charge! Perhaps they've been warned about the dwarven seductress roaming these halls!
- One of the dwarves tips his hand by going on a misogynist rant about how real women stay in the breeding pens where they belong, and the battle begins in earnest.
- Sydney shoots one of them with a six-shooter and gets mobbed by the others, who are yelling "they've got a gun!"
- Jojo's lightning rune axe doesn't do extra damage because it earths in their earth bodies. Instead she flash-steps to Odo's side and blows half the clay out of one's body before Odo finishes it off by going for the head.
- Aximander spears the (most) misogynist Dwarf through the belly with his spear, knocking the gems clean out of him before he can heal.
- Philipides gambits to slice straight through a crumbling pillar! It collapses perfectly towards the centre of the room like a felled tree, squishing the two remaining Dwarves.
- They're not dead, just squished, but they surrender now that they're clearly not going anywhere! They bargain with the party - they'll mine through the nearby rubble in exchange for their lives.
- The noise has clearly alerted the people in the next area - a high-ceilinged hall with pillars and a whole lot of spiderwebs at the end.
- Looking up from their rats on sticks being cooked over the smoky fire, complaining about the lack of real meat for tributes lately, are a motley band of six malformed clay dwarves!
- Odo strolls in with the ol' "Hail friends!" and they immediately charge! Perhaps they've been warned about the dwarven seductress roaming these halls!
- One of the dwarves tips his hand by going on a misogynist rant about how real women stay in the breeding pens where they belong, and the battle begins in earnest.
- Sydney shoots one of them with a six-shooter and gets mobbed by the others, who are yelling "they've got a gun!"
- Jojo's lightning rune axe doesn't do extra damage because it earths in their earth bodies. Instead she flash-steps to Odo's side and blows half the clay out of one's body before Odo finishes it off by going for the head.
- Aximander spears the (most) misogynist Dwarf through the belly with his spear, knocking the gems clean out of him before he can heal.
- Philipides gambits to slice straight through a crumbling pillar! It collapses perfectly towards the centre of the room like a felled tree, squishing the two remaining Dwarves.
- They're not dead, just squished, but they surrender now that they're clearly not going anywhere! They bargain with the party - they'll mine through the nearby rubble in exchange for their lives.
--- Work it is!
- While the Dwarves dig through the rubble, the party decides to use this smoky fire for its intended purpose - cooking! With a nice mix of boar meat, lion meat, goblin vegetable-flesh, and a trickle of sweet milk from a cursed chalice, Sydney cooks "Milky Meat" aka "All That Walks". It's... palatable.
- Philipides chews it down, but the goblin meat is making his belly feel a bit funny... and is that a giggling sound?
- The Dwarves have finished mining now, and the area beyond is clearly Ur-Darghab architecture rather than the older carved stone of the pyramid. Cave crickets as big as a thumb are hopping out of the hole too. Odo licks her lips!
- While the Dwarves dig through the rubble, the party decides to use this smoky fire for its intended purpose - cooking! With a nice mix of boar meat, lion meat, goblin vegetable-flesh, and a trickle of sweet milk from a cursed chalice, Sydney cooks "Milky Meat" aka "All That Walks". It's... palatable.
- Philipides chews it down, but the goblin meat is making his belly feel a bit funny... and is that a giggling sound?
- The Dwarves have finished mining now, and the area beyond is clearly Ur-Darghab architecture rather than the older carved stone of the pyramid. Cave crickets as big as a thumb are hopping out of the hole too. Odo licks her lips!
Totals: 6000 exp
Treasure:
- 7 rats tied by the tails (7 exp)
- 7 rats tied by the tails (7 exp)
- 1100ob in dwarven corpse-gems (1100 exp)
Total: 1107 exp
Murders:
- A seduced clay dwarf (500 exp)
- A small band of dwarven rat-catchers (225 exp)
- An incel gang of clay dwarves (3000 exp)
Total: 4725 exp
- An incel gang of clay dwarves (3000 exp)
Total: 4725 exp
OOC:
- Carter the Chronicler & Treasurer
- George the Expedition Leader
- Tom the Vanguard
- Tom the Vanguard
Exp Totals:
- Carter / Sydney, Level 7 Magic-User: 73253 (Level up at 144000)
Level Up! +1d4 HP! +1 Mana! +Free Spell! +1 to Saves! +Backstory!
Level Up! +1d4 HP! +1 Mana! +Free Spell! +1 to Saves! +Backstory!
- Ollie / Jojo Fullbeard, Level 6 Muscle Wizard: 50369 (Level up at 72000)
- George / Phillipides Goath, Level 6 Fighter: 36369 (Level up at 64000)
- Kitty / Julian & Aximander, Level 5 Languid Wastrel: 28738 (Level up at 36000)
- Tom / Odo Grumblebelch, Level 4 Dwarven / Barbarian: 12634 (Level up at 16000)
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