Tuesday, 11 January 2022

Session 306 - Dungeons and Dragons Den

 Date: July 28, 21 p.p.

Moon: Waxing Gibbous
Zenith: The Allfather


New Backstory:
-
Celebus was in charge of New Moondin immigration bureaucracy when a group of Meatlands refugees came to town. He kicked them back out because they didn't meet his quota, didn't pass the entry test, and were smelly. +1 Strength


New Characters:
- Prismundo, an Intergalacticist Cleric from space. Has a hologram projection device. Here to chase down interstellar criminal Galaxy Johnson who, at time of publication, may in fact still be slowly rising into space at a rate of 10' per round.



Events:

--- An Audience with the Meatlord

- It is time for the end of year madcap scheme to end all madcap schemes - persuade the Meatlord and his four most financially powerful backers to invest in Swan the Swift's new business venture - the Wheatlands!
- They head to the Meatlord's steak-shaped palace along the spit-slicked streets of Salivasburger, wave their letters granting an audience with him, and enter! Since there aren't enough letters for each of them, Amanta hides inside one of the necklaces.
- They are led blindfolded to an inner room of the palace. When the blindfolds are taken off they see... the dragon's den! Literally actually, since a pale white dragon is bound to the ceiling with chains while enormous leeches suck at its flesh.

--- The Ultimate Powerpoint
- A real world powerpoint presentation ensues, and it's amazing.




--- The Outcome
- After some rounds of questioning, 4/5 of the "dragons" decide to invest! It's a success!
- Since the Wheatlands plan requires a literal shit ton of shit, the new entrepeneurs are taken by the king of the skullcrabs, Tooker Skullyman, to the legendary hidden Kaldane Gardens. An underground garden with imported dirt where the skullcrabs grow veggies to ensure the Meatlords' minions don't get scurvy.
- The King tells them about the power structure of Salivasburger, and about how he doesn't care about who's in charge overground so long as he can continue to rule down here. Looks like the coup is on!

--- Bone Lord Persuaded
- Finally they head back to the heist house and meet up with the Bone Lord Guido. Swan persuades him to set up a more equitable power structure once he comes into power. Guido agrees!

Total: 5000 exp


OOC:
Chronicler and Quartermaster - Charles (200 exp)
Vanguard and Presenter - George (600 exp)
Expedition Leader and Chef - Kitty (200 exp)



Exp Totals:
- George / Swan the Swift, Level 6 Barbarian: 44098 (Level up at 64000)
- Charles / Celebus Uppytus, Level 6 Necromancer: 37923 (Level up at 72000)
- Kitty / Amanta, Level 6 Mantis Specialist: 35081 (Level up at 56000)
- Tom / Prismundo, Level 1 Intergalacticist Cleric: 1250 (Level up at 2250)





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