Date: 23 April
Moon: Full Moon
Zenith: The Dead God
New Backstory:
- Randell was a simple generic Level 1 adventurer, on his way to a generic level 1 town with rats in the basement, when he was waylaid by a beautiful level 1 maiden. Their passionate romance ended when he discovered that she was no level 1 maiden, she was a level 99 Vampire Boss! In a fit of panic, and a bit of blind luck, Randell managed to slay her. When you carouse, gain a contact of your sexual preference in this town.
- Randell also had very religious grandparents, whom he loved and respected and was raised by after Jonathon Toast killed his parents. Turns out that Randell's "failed orphan" backstory was because he actually became an orphan very late in life! Double religion bonus.
- Randell also had very religious grandparents, whom he loved and respected and was raised by after Jonathon Toast killed his parents. Turns out that Randell's "failed orphan" backstory was because he actually became an orphan very late in life! Double religion bonus.
Events:
--- The Dragon in the Next Room
- Forewarned that there are dragons ahead, the party bother Sydney into reopening the portal to their Safe Space. There is a waft of garlic from the next room, and their thoughts of delicious garlic are tempered by the thought that sometimes poison smells like stuff you aren't expecting. Distantly from another direction, there is the faint echo of Dwarven song.
- Before entering the Safe Space, Sydney wafts a blast of Cloudkill into the next room in the hopes of cheesing the garlicky dragon. Alas, burning eyes can be seen and a booming voice says WHO ATTEMPTS TO POISON DRESSELDRAQ?!?! before Sydney scarpers into the extradimensional flat.
--- The Next Morning
- While everyone else is resting, Randell wakes up fairly early. He nabs a beer from the fridge to feed to Divinity's leg (which is, of course, the cocaine-craving vulture demon XORTHREMIUTH) and nips out into the dungeon to investigate the garlic situation. Breakfast, you know?
- Before entering the Safe Space, Sydney wafts a blast of Cloudkill into the next room in the hopes of cheesing the garlicky dragon. Alas, burning eyes can be seen and a booming voice says WHO ATTEMPTS TO POISON DRESSELDRAQ?!?! before Sydney scarpers into the extradimensional flat.
--- The Next Morning
- While everyone else is resting, Randell wakes up fairly early. He nabs a beer from the fridge to feed to Divinity's leg (which is, of course, the cocaine-craving vulture demon XORTHREMIUTH) and nips out into the dungeon to investigate the garlic situation. Breakfast, you know?
- He instead comes face to face with Dresseldraq the Dwimmerdragon, a six-legged wingless dragon carved from gem-encrusted stone. It's quite chatty, at least to Randell, who flatters its gems and asks about the breath. The breath turns to stone, but smells tasty at least. Dresseldraq is here to guard the way down to the city below, and its function was once as a sort of Dwarf-recycler. He will let people past if they have a special brooch that marks people as friends of the city.
- Meanwhile Hagan the Heretic pokes his head out of the door and heads off in the direction of the Dwarven singing from before. Randell takes his leave from the dragon and follows.
- Meanwhile Hagan the Heretic pokes his head out of the door and heads off in the direction of the Dwarven singing from before. Randell takes his leave from the dragon and follows.
--- Dwarves of Ur-Kalladh
- Hagan starts singing yesterday's song, with backing vocals from Randell, and lo! Dwarves emerge! They are armoured in very fancy armour. They're from Ur-Kalladh and here to try to create some Stone Sons from the azoth-enriched stone. Unfortunately the Stone Sons awoke very suddenly and violently and ran off immediately!
- They say that the dragon will let Dwarves past as traditional custodians of the deep city. They also sell Randell some "really crappy" chain armour that is, in fact, rather good. Just worse than theirs.
- They say that the dragon will let Dwarves past as traditional custodians of the deep city. They also sell Randell some "really crappy" chain armour that is, in fact, rather good. Just worse than theirs.
--- Passing the Dragon
- They head back to the dragon with an idea of how to get past. Randell is mates with the dragon now, so he's cool. Hagan is a Dwarf, likewise cool. Divinity is going to wear Hagan's brooch that lets you through, also cool. Sydney is the problem.
- Luckily Sydney can turn into a cat with the cat-collar ring. Cool!
- Thus the heroes pass by the dragon.
- Luckily Sydney can turn into a cat with the cat-collar ring. Cool!
- Thus the heroes pass by the dragon.
--- And Yet, Dragons.
- The next room also has a dwimmerdragon, but this one simply growls and grunts and looks with hostile intent!
- They flee, finding yet another dragon! This one is less friendly, albeit talkative, and the party flees!
- They run, unheeding of their surroundings, deeper into the dungeon!
- Alas, after a thrilling chase sequence, the dragons catch up to them!
- They flee, finding yet another dragon! This one is less friendly, albeit talkative, and the party flees!
- They run, unheeding of their surroundings, deeper into the dungeon!
- Alas, after a thrilling chase sequence, the dragons catch up to them!
--- Chamber of the Cavemen
- It's a vast chamber, filled with a whole load of cavemen! Ugg ugg, etc!
- Hagan and Divinity prostrate themselves before the lead caveman, who has a big feathered crown.
- Sydney has an idea - activating a backstory ability to... force someone to make a romantic advance.
- The chieftain approaches Sydney amorously, to her disdain. At least he sends away the dragons! They've got a pre-existing relationship it seems.
- The chief is motioning to his crotch, Sydney gets on their knees, and... Sydney reaches forward with the cat-collar ring and turns the chief into a cat!
- Randall tries shooting the silver gun, but alas when everything Sydney was holding got turned to silver it also silverified the propellant! The bullet simply slides out of the chamber!
- Hagan and Divinity prostrate themselves before the lead caveman, who has a big feathered crown.
- Sydney has an idea - activating a backstory ability to... force someone to make a romantic advance.
- The chieftain approaches Sydney amorously, to her disdain. At least he sends away the dragons! They've got a pre-existing relationship it seems.
- The chief is motioning to his crotch, Sydney gets on their knees, and... Sydney reaches forward with the cat-collar ring and turns the chief into a cat!
- Randall tries shooting the silver gun, but alas when everything Sydney was holding got turned to silver it also silverified the propellant! The bullet simply slides out of the chamber!
- There is a brief battle. The chief is killed, along with several other cavemen, and the remainder bow down before the mage Sydney. Minions!
--- The Way Down
- They claim the loot of the Chieftain - a big ol' macuahuitl and some sort of Rod of Unbuckling. It unbinds, unknots, undoes stuff.
- The cavemen tell Sydney of a way down they know of, guarded by a huge statue of a Dwarf. They head there... and the Dwarf bows down before Divinity and her brooch.
- A wall of light blocks the way down. Sydney uses rune bullshit to evade it, and they continue on with the cavemen in tow.
- The cavemen tell Sydney of a way down they know of, guarded by a huge statue of a Dwarf. They head there... and the Dwarf bows down before Divinity and her brooch.
- A wall of light blocks the way down. Sydney uses rune bullshit to evade it, and they continue on with the cavemen in tow.
--- A Key
- At the bottom is an ominous black room with white mosaics. Pillars read Bonito, Justitio, and Malito. Each corresponds to murals of good prisoners let go, bad prisoners being killed, thus between simply imprisoned.
- Sydney sends a couple of cavemen out to scout. Randell goes with one group. One opens a door and he sees a mechanical hand lash out and rip the caveman's face clean off, then take off its thumbs! Fuck!
- Randell cautiously looks down the corridor and sees an alcove, past the death door. He bravely walks up to it and a magic mouth demands something in Latin.
- Hagan speaks Latin! Lucky! He turns up and the mouth is asking him to put his hand inside it for verification. With trepidation, he does... and it marks his hand with a stamp and gives him a fat actual key!
- Sydney sends a couple of cavemen out to scout. Randell goes with one group. One opens a door and he sees a mechanical hand lash out and rip the caveman's face clean off, then take off its thumbs! Fuck!
- Randell cautiously looks down the corridor and sees an alcove, past the death door. He bravely walks up to it and a magic mouth demands something in Latin.
- Hagan speaks Latin! Lucky! He turns up and the mouth is asking him to put his hand inside it for verification. With trepidation, he does... and it marks his hand with a stamp and gives him a fat actual key!
- The door behind them opens and... oh fuck oh no... it's some sort of horrible clanking android trying to puppet the caveman's mouth to try and bait Randell in! Its body is a torture rack, its head is an iron maiden head, and its hand are thumbscrews!
- Both flee, Randell up the corridor and Hagan back to the black room.
- Both flee, Randell up the corridor and Hagan back to the black room.
--- Torture Golems
- Randell tries a door and inside is... gems! Big massive gems! On either side are immobile torture golems.
- Randell, naturally, takes the gems. The golems come to life and attack!
- Randell, naturally, takes the gems. The golems come to life and attack!
- Divinity busts in to help, hearing the screams, and helps free Randell from the thumb-screwing clutches of the golem! They escape together, discovering that at least the golems are slow in pursuit!
- The golems stop just before reaching the magic mouth.
- Upon seeing that Hagan and his key aren't attacked by the golems, a caveman attempts to get himself a key. Alas! He fails! The torture golems SURGE FORWARD and attack!
- Upon seeing that Hagan and his key aren't attacked by the golems, a caveman attempts to get himself a key. Alas! He fails! The torture golems SURGE FORWARD and attack!
- There is an extended battle. The golems are extremely strong, they can wrestle you onto the rack for damage over time, or just thumbscrew you to death with their powerful attacks!
- Cavemen fall left and right!
- Cavemen fall left and right!
- Divinity is caught on the rack, but channels holy power into a full-body smite to release herself!
- Hagan holds back, safe with the key, supporting where he can.
- Sydney blasts with magic missiles and is aghast as their cavemen minions fall.
- Randell keeps his distance, already badly hurt by these very contraptions before, attacking only when the opportunity presents itself.
- The torturebots eventually fall, but the party is aghast at their power. This truly is deep dungeon.
- Sydney blasts with magic missiles and is aghast as their cavemen minions fall.
- Randell keeps his distance, already badly hurt by these very contraptions before, attacking only when the opportunity presents itself.
- The torturebots eventually fall, but the party is aghast at their power. This truly is deep dungeon.
--- Stamp the Hands
- Finally, everyone (and the surviving cavemen) get their hands stamped and their keys approved with the help of Sydney's meta-manipulation powers. Safe from torturebots... they hope!
- To prove this, Randell goes into the room opposite his gem room and takes the gems. The torturebots, thankfully, remain immobile!
- To prove this, Randell goes into the room opposite his gem room and takes the gems. The torturebots, thankfully, remain immobile!
Total: 11000 exp
Treasure:
- 6 massive gems (15000 exp)
- 6 massive gems (15000 exp)
- Rod of Unbuckling
- Huge Macahuitl
- Huge Macahuitl
- Torturebot fragments
Total: 15000 exp
Total: 15000 exp
Enemies:
- A whole bunch of cavemen (200 exp)
- Two torturebots (3000 exp)
- Two torturebots (3000 exp)
Total: 3200 exp
Exp Totals:
- Carter / Sydney, Level 8 Magic-User: 166394 (Level up at 288000)
- George / Hagen the Heretic, Level 6 Dwarf: 54942 (Level up at 64000)
- Ollie / Divinity, Level 6 Battle-Cleric (Fighter 3/ Cleric 3): 54138 (Level up at 72000)
- Tom / Randell the Vampire Slayer, Level 5 Fighter: 18570 (Level up at 32000)
Level Up! +1d8 HP! +1 to hit! +1 to crit/fumble! +backstory!
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