Tuesday 5 November 2024

Session 387 - Happy Hobbit Halloween!

Date: 29 October 1624

Moon Phase: Waning Crescent
Moon Face: Plain
Zenith Deity: Oberon

Returning Characters:
- Brie van der Hells. Necromancer. Still commands the undead priest-zombie Nutella.
- Bulgur, Son of Borgar. Barbarian. Has gained the ability to let out a bellowing roar whenever forced to make a Stun save.
- Gaius Julius Drusus. Halfling. Limited empathy. Commands the tamed Barbarian Lurpak.
- Nines. Inheritor. Still looking for something or someone tasty to absorb.



New Backstory:
- Brie van der Hells was bullied as a child. When Brie's theft of a sack of potatoes was pinned on the bully, Brie just sat back and laughed. Heal 1HP when a randomly assigned attack hits someone else instead of you.
- Bulgur, Son of Borgar tried to help an injured cow - Daisy - during a stampede on the dairy farm. Alas, she couldn't reach poor Daisy in time. Once per session, get to a downed ally's side in a single round by some means.
- Gaius Julius Drusus lost an argument with Nines over the extent of his "reformed" psychopathy. When Gaius fails a Save, someone else can pass the same Save.
- Nines confronted the boss of the gang he was running with after he discovered the gang was exploiting children to facilitate their crimes. At will, cause a creature to prioritise you


Events:

--- Hobbit Halloween!
- After last session's death-defying antics trying not to get poisoned by Halflings in a pub, our "heroes" leave through the back door into the thinning rain. They hold a long piece of wood - the actual bar itself - above their heads to ward off the stinging Unmaking Rain.
- The only issue... they warped here, so they've no idea how to get out directly. They pick a direction and head through the streets, the rain stopping and eventually giving way to the weather known as the Warning.
- Gas Fronts are less dangerous now, certainly not insta-death any more, but the Warning still serves to warn that something very bad might be coming. On the plus side, swollen gourds protrude from the earth during a Warning - and of course these are pumpkins! It's Halloween!
- They say a quick prayer to the Gods Above. Minerva is at zenith, and her protection brings a sturdy AC bonus. Gaius harvests some pumpkins and carves them from barbarian-back.

--- The Nicer Part of Town
- Soon they follow the orange glow of Jack O'Lanterns to the better part of town. Less industrial, much more traditional. Hobbit holes and smiling farmers, with even the occasional "Largeling" wandering around. They talk to a Largeling and she says they're welcome here, and that humans disappear in the bad part of town.
- Gaius asks to speak to a "normal sized person" and the lady gets her manager - a lovely hobbit lady called Mistress Proudfoot. No weirdness happening here, no sirree.
- There's a harvest festival tonight! How lovely! There's even a big festive area in the middle of the town square, an absolutely massive church-sized pumpkin inside a hedge maze, and loads of free stuff! In fact, says Ms Proudfoot, they're more than willing to give things away to outsiders to ensure they go on their way!
- Brie finds a potion seller selling potions and snags a couple. One is a Seagull Potion and the other is a Potion of Rodent Charisma. Interesting!
- They also hear the story of the Pumpkin Demon who comes at Halloween to snatch away children. Bulgur immediately disrobes and slathers himself with pumpkin to look the part! It's very spooky.

--- Contests!
- In order to enter the hedge maze you need to win tickets, and tickets are earned through minigames! Classic!
- Gaius goes straight to the archery competition and does incredibly well, even getting to keep the bow! He's able to basically get everyone enough tickets for the hedge maze in one go!
- People want to try the other minigames though, so they do.
- Everyone absolutely gorges themselves at the pumpkin pie eating competition. It's a quadruple shared victory! Nines and Bulgur win themselves Punkinhead Hammers which do massive damage on evens.
- Nines nails the pumpkin slinging contest with a huge crit! Brie meanwhile hucks a pumpkin at an XL Bully owner, angering him. They move swiftly on.
- The Halloween Chili Competition is where competition is fiercest because everyone wants to cook! Between Nines' Haunted Hoedown, Gaius' Nutellu Ragu, and Brie's Halloween Butter Bean Blast there's a clear winner - the Haunted Hoedown! Tastyyyyy!

--- The Maze
- Finally they enter the maze. It's beginning to get dark, but due to the sheer power of the Butter Bean Blast neither Bulgur nor Brie can get lost out here! However they can intentionally explore at the risk of it getting dark...
- Of course they do! Bulgur finds an entire doner kebab, complete with carving knife! Brie finds an "evil fox" who starts to follow her around and have extremely loud sex with fellow foxes in the bushes.
- They hear goblins on the approach, plotting the murder of anyone in the maze...

--- Goblin Murder!
- Nines goes first and tries to talk to them reasonably. However to nobody's surprise the Hobgoblin has been Tamed by Halflings and can't listen to reason! His minions listen to him in turn, so it's a fight!
- The battle is fierce but the obscene amount of damage dealt by Punkinhead Hammers helps wipe out the Hobgoblin and break the morale of his minions.
- Gaius shoots them in the back as they flee. The one survivor enters the giant pumpkin and SCREAMS as the pumpkin walls come alive and squash him!

--- Bulgur Counter!
- Bulgur strides into the pumpkin and the walls begin to close around him.
- Pah! This is nothing! Bulgur easily passes the save and instead smashes his feet into the ground and roars! The earth shakes and the pumpkin walls collapse into themselves!
- Bulgur grabs razor sharp "throwing seeds" from the mess, and the rest follow him in.

--- Demon Ritual!
- Of course, in the middle of the massive pumpkin is the inevitable cause of all this Halloween horror - a Halfling trying to summon a demon! He's got a big pentagram and everything, and declares that Bunkertown must be punished!
- He of course cackles and declares that the ritual will be complete in a FEW ROUNDS' TIME!
- The battle is difficult since the Halfling is standing inside a burning ritual circle that crackles with terrible energies, but soon he is defeated at the hands of Lurpak (forced to burn himself in the energies) and the zombie Nutella (body stuck with razor pumpkin seeds for extra wrestle damage).
- Bulgur's seed-chucking abilities are sure to be legendary after using a patented Random Bullshit Go! attack to pepper the Halfling with seeds.
- With moments to go, the Halfling cultist is defeated! He slumps and the energies of the ritual lash all around the inside of the pumpkin, and the echoing laughter of the Pumpkin King turns into a scream as the unfinished ritual sends it back into hell!

--- Not so Evil Fox
- The horrible fox, who was nearly mind-controlled itself during the battle, leads the party out of the pumpkin as it begins to collapse. Orange flames flicker into the sky as the great gourd collapses behind them! They're safe!
- Afterwards they decide to sit in the hedge maze for a bit, lick their wounds, and have a bite to eat from their leftovers and cold-ish doner kebab.
- Halloween adventure - COMPLETE!

Total: 9000 exp


Loot:
- A dodgy bow.
- 2 Pumpkinhead Hammers
- Lots of Halloween Tickets
- Doner Kebab w/ knife (300 exp)
- The sly attention of an Evil Fox
Total: 300 exp

Murders:
- Several Goblins and their Hobgoblin master. (150 exp)
- A Halfling cultist (50 exp)
Total: 200 exp


Roles:
- Carter the Chronicler and Vanguard (200 exp/level)
- Kitty the Expedition Leader (100 exp/level)
- Ollie the Quartermaster (100 exp/level)
- Tim the Triage and Chef (200 exp/level)


Exp Totals:
- Timothy / Gaius Julius Drusus, Level 3 Halfling: 5743 (Level up at 8000)
Level Up! +1d6 HP! +1 to Saves! +1 Taming! +Backstory!
- Carter / Nines, Level 3 Inheritor: 5743 (Level up at 9000)
Level Up! +1d6 HP! +1 to Saves! +1 Meat Point! +Backstory!
- Kitty / Bulgur, Son of Borgar, Level 3 Barbarian: 5443 (Level up at 8000)
Level Up! +1d8 HP! +1 to Saves! +Barbarian Power! +Backstory!
- Ollie / Brie van der Hells, Level 3 Necromancer: 5343 (Level up at 9000)
Level Up! +1d4 HP! +1 to Saves! +1 Mana! +New Spell!  +Backstory!


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