Session 68 - Fear

Next week's regular pub sesh has been cancelled due to the Christmas period, so Ollie has booked us into the Lamb Tavern.
I hope to see you all there!

Please direct any "but this place is better" mail to Reply All and it shall be considered.

Session 68 - Fear

Campaign Date:
All Hallow's Eve, 30 October, 1448
Moon Phase: Full Moon
Zodiac: Virgo

Enemies Defeated:

- Zeke Duncaster, stabbed and burned as he attempted to stop you ascending the mountain (50 exp)

Treasure and Equipment:

- A variety of equipment from the climber's pack

- A painting of yourselves (2000 exp)

- Two cold blue eyes looted from a deer's head (100 exp)

- A large bronze key

- A jewelled dagger (1400 exp)

- A ruby necklace (1000 exp)

- An onyx bowl (1300 exp)

- A small walnut locket (100 exp)
Total: 5900 exp

Exploration:
- Explored 15 dungeon rooms and areas (300 exp)

Total: 240 exp

Events:

- A ragtag band of fools ascended Mt Death Frost, hunting old gold and lost family and eternal life. (50 exp)

- They met an old man in a ramshackle hut. He told them that the place atop the mountain was cursed and attempted to stop them climbing to their doom. They stabbed him and burnt him and left his still-burning corpse in the snow (50 exp)

- They reached a graveyard past a grim hanging tree. They stole the hangman's noose and one carved their name into the bark. It bled human blood. (50 exp)

- They peered into the house on the mountain, finding it made of woodgrained stone and covered in writing in a tongue long forgotten. (50 exp)

- The back door was swinging open, footprints leading away through the snow, so they entered. Inside was a bedroom with abandoned climbing gear. They stole it all. (50 exp)

- They explored the house further, finding a painting of themselves and a huge skin-bound book filled with names. A deer's head on the wall had glassy eyes. They took those too. (50 exp)

- The trapdoor sprang open with a scream, and they lowered the Dwarf down to take a look. She found a hallway of screaming faces. They followed. (50 exp)

- The hallway ended in a door with a demon-faced lock. They opened it and entered a room of left hands, then emerged into a doomed chapel strung with twelve skulls. (50 exp)

- The skulls began dropping as they explored further in, finding a door and an altar and a basin full of teeth. The chapel's dark organ claimed the life of the Cleric when he tinkled the keys, dying in a burst of yellow mold. They used his teeth as an offering to open the door. (50 exp)

- Inside there was a crossroads, and a singing static noise could be heard. There was an entrance to an embalming room of some kind. A book within detailed the creation of flesh constructs and countless bones. (50 exp)

- A strange door unlocked when a wheel was turned, inside there were countless bodies interred behind smooth ice. On the ground, a dead Dwarf whose hands were closed around a smooth sphere, wearing armour and clothes unfamiliar. (50 exp)

- Skulls continued to fall as they continued to explore, finding a crypt full of even more bodies. They desecrated corpses for treasure, and found a musical score entitled The Core Remains. (50 exp)

- They found a room of strange history books and an ocular device that allowed them to be read. They stole it and left. (50 exp)

- At the end of the hallway a further vault door was found. They opened it and found an eye whose pupil was many eyes. Two turned back to investigate a second door from the chapel, two ascended to the surface to play the Core Remains on the harpsichord in the house, two kept going. (50 exp)

- The two who kept going saw a man's jellied head framed in the door singing the static. The two who went to the surface tried the harpsichord, it didn't play a note. One of those two descended to try the pipe organ. We end on a cliffhanger. (50 exp)

Total: 750 exp

Misc:

- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)

- Kill It With Fire bonus (50 exp)

- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)

- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)

- Tomb Raider bonus (50 exp)

- Badass Backstory bonus (100 exp - Dani)

- Amusing Death bonus (500 exp - Dominic/Buttshine)

Total: 300 exp + bonus

Quests and Rumours:
- Dani's brother was last seen ascending Mt Death Frost.

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Buttshine, played a pipe organ so badly that he died.

Exp Pool if Someone Survives:

7840 exp

[[]]

Absent or Retired:

Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 5 Fighter: 23330 (Level up at 32000)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 4 Barbarian: 14444 (Level up at 16000)
Charles / Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 6911 (Level up at 7000)

James / Quarion, Level 2 Elf (Gremling): 5373 (Level up at 6000)
 Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 2750 (Level up at 4500)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 1489 (Level up at 2250)
Sarah / Mana, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 1289 (Level up at 1500)
Kyle / Jane Doe, Level 1 Dwarf: 908 (Level up at 2200)

David / Theras, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 5482 (Level up at 6000)

Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 3 Halfling: 5047 (Level up at 8000)
-- Bat-Thing, Level 1 Frankenbat
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)

Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 67 - Red Dead

Apologies for the delay on this one! I spent the following two nights on from DnD drunk which unfortunately precludes writing a recap, and now I'm in Italy and sliced my hand open trying to open a bottle of wine (for full story, see my facebook wall!)
There is a higher-than-average chance that I will forget something, so apologies in advance! Especially since I left my notes back home.

You are now more or less redeemed, although no doubt your names will be spread far and wide.

Next session we will have nearly caught up to the date in the real world which is interesting! Or interesting to me at any rate...
I started the calendar at February 17 last year, and due to the way time tends to stretch or contract in D&D the dates have been sliding around all over the place!
Anyway, spookily the date on which the timelines align is close to Halloween. ooOOooOooOoooo.
Next session will be a special spooky Halloween one-shot set approximately 10 years before the present campaign date, in a time before there were all these Necromancers and skeletons and stuff roaming around. Dun dun duuuuun.

Session 67 - Red Dead

Campaign Date:
Last Day, 30 October, 1549
Moon Phase: Full Moon

Zodiac: Virgo

Enemies Defeated:
- A bunch of skeletons and zombies, savagely ripped apart (300 exp)
- A bunch of human guards (300 exp)
- A Necromancer, bloodsucked (25 exp)
- John Revenant the foppish murder-ghost, killed with holy water then cursed knife jammed into ground. (50 exp)
Total: 1215 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- like 50 bucks from searching bodies I think? (50 exp)
- A few horses
- some other miscellanea
- your freedom!
Total: 50 exp

Exploration:
- Travelled 42 miles (140 exp)
- 3 random encounters (60 exp)
- Explored 2 dungeon rooms (40 exp)
Total: 240 exp

Events:
- Force of horse guards rides out of Galth, surrounds party to arrest them and await trial. (50 exp)
- Negotiations beak down fairly quickly, Bingo punches the ground and puts most of the guards to sleep. The captain flees towards backup. (50 exp)
- Sleeping guards' horses are running amok, but several are caught and tanned by party members who flee on horseback and in wagon. (50 exp)
- Bingo and Lulu, assuming they aren't as easily implicated as the rest, head to Fate to grab the necklace for Priscilla. (50 exp)
- On the way there they see a skirmish between army and necromancer warbands outside a village. Lulu runs through and kills the lead necromancer, but her sword maxes out on blood and she goes berserk. (50 exp)
- Bingo flees, returning an hour later to find a bloodbath. They save the village from the remaining undead... but receive no thanks. (50 exp)
- Fate is reached and Bingo, as the person who isn't a barely in control red rage monster, goes inside to grab necklace from bank vault. (50 exp)
- He meets up with Slim Jimmy, known fence with underworld connections, and negotiates a deal to clear the party's name. 50 gold and the head of the vivimancer witch and he can wrangle a pardon. (50 exp)
- Bingo buys a bunch of gunpowder as he leaves, travels back to group with Lulu. Party re-enter Priscilla's home dungeon (50 exp)
- John Doe goes in with necklace, rest of party waits in entrance chamber with many barrels of gunpowder. (50 exp)
- Priscilla is grateful, has entire cat for head. Also grateful about return of real head. Says she'll unscramble John's limbs easy enough, but the head has a 25% chance if death. (50 exp)
- John accepts risks, wants the head done too. He dies on the operating table. His last screamed word "pineapple!" is trigger for party to blow gunpowder, they do so and the entrance to the hill collapses. (50 exp)
- Party re-enter via fissure after waiting a while to heal and come to terms with the death. They explore and find the place is gutted, and when entering one room come face to invisible face with John Revenant the Lethal Dandy. (50 exp)
- John attacks but is killed with holy water. Bingo takes his large knife. (50 exp)
- Hall with collapsed flesh goliath thing found, party enter Priscilla's chambers to find John Doe's armored but headless body and an empty room. The armour rattles to life and goes straight for Lulu. (50 exp)
- Awkwardly, John Revenant's cursed knife chooses this moment to start shanking Bingo, who handily jams it into a crack in the ground (50 exp)
- John Doe's armour is finally taken down by a concerted effort of fighting force, and his fleshy regains have been chunked by Stabbington swirling his sword around in there. (50 exp)
- With John Doe's head in their hands, the party decides to use their dead friend as a scapegoat and say he was demonically controlling them to commit vile acts. Sounds legit! (50 exp)
Total: 900 exp

Misc:
- Antagonist Emancipator bonus (50 exp)
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)
- Increased Party Fame! (50 exp)
- Increased Party Infamy! (50 exp)
- Headtaker bonus (50 exp)
- Leave a man behind bonus (50 exp)
- Kill It With Fire bonus (50 exp)
- Michael Bay bonus (50 exp)
- Lonely Death Bonus (500 exp to Kyle's next character - Jane Doe)
Total: 450 exp + bonus

Active Businesses:
- Peggy Pigrider - Pie Mama's. Safe. Value: 1213sp
- John Doe the Unlucky - Anvil, Mining and Craft Company. Risky. Value: 1579sp
- Lulu Spiderbite - Clunge Honey. Safe. Value: 1190sp
- Joe Joe - Josephine's Petting Zoo. Risky. Value: 1500sp
- Stabbington Shanks - Tomb Busters. Risky. Value: 600sp

Quests and Rumours:
- Living outside the lawwww means nobody to chat to.

Death Toll and Injuries:

- John Doe the Unlucky, unluckily died on the operating table while trying to be arranged back into his normal shape.

Exp Totals:
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 5 Fighter: 23330 (Level up at 32000)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 4 Barbarian: 14444 (Level up at 16000)
Charles / Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 6911 (Level up at 7000)
Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 2750 (Level up at 4500)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 1489 (Level up at 2250)
Sarah / Mana, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 1289 (Level up at 1500)
Kyle / Jane Doe, Level 1 Dwarf: 908 (Level up at 2200)

And:
David / Theras, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 5482 (Level up at 6000)

[[]]

Absent or Retired:
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 3 Halfling: 5047 (Level up at 8000)
-- Bat-Thing, Level 1 Frankenbat
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)
James / Quarion, Level 2 Elf (Gremling): 4965 (Level up at 6000)
Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 66 - An Auspicious Session Number To Turn Evil On

Alriiiight here's your session report!

The general spiral into infamy continues with John Doe making a deal with a baddie in order to get his body re-rearranged.

Next session we're back at the Mad Hatter, the venue was fine but no plug! I was amused to see the interest the bar staff had in our game. 

I'm also officially closing our doors to newbies for the next while, there are a few other open tables opening up and we're definitely at capacity!

I'll be taking a leaf out of the hydra-dog's book if we have 6+ players in future, and split the group into a couple of sub-groups. A caller in each group will tell me what's going down, so hopefully that should make it more manageable for me and keep people from feeling left out until I get round to them!

Awwright, see yas next time!

Session 66 - An Auspicious Session Number To Turn Evil On
Campaign Date:
Tuesday, 24 October, 1549
Moon Phase: First Quarter
Zodiac: Virgo

Enemies Defeated:
- Some sort of dog-hydra, defeated chiefly via fire (750 exp)

- A single man-bat, killed by ricocheting crossbow bolt (25 exp)

- 14 skeletons, mostly run over with a chariot (140 exp)
Total: 915 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- Two small gems (80 exp)

- Two keys
Total: 80 exp

Exploration:
- Travelled 36 miles (120 exp)

- 2 random encounters (40 exp)

- Explored 4 dungeon rooms (80 exp)

Total: 240 exp

Events:
- Party ascends staircase filled with rapidly setting acid sludge, find themselves face to face with two-headed creature made of a large lizard body and dog heads. (50 exp)
- Battle is joined and John Doe, stuffed into a hole by man-bats, sees everything start to kick off below. (50 exp)

- Chopping off both heads results in spray of acid sludge from neck holes, melting several more barbarians as two more heads predictably emerge from each neck hole. (50 exp)

- John Doe attaches to ceiling and swings overhead with flame sword, attacking hydra body. Disturbed bats attack him at end of each arc of swing (50 exp)

- Zea lobs his lantern at the creature, burning one of the heads off (50 exp)

- John Doe swings down and lops off two heads at once with his flaming sword, they don't grow back. He drags the beast by its tail towards the ceiling and Stabbington shanks it in the side. (50 exp)

- Acidic bile sprays from the wound and pours over the floor, man-bats swarm to feast, party fucks off down the stairs for a break. (50 exp)

- Returning, Lulu shoots her flamethrower around the room to clear out the man-bats. Doors on other side of cavern investigated. (50 exp)

- Double doors lead into room with men at work scooping gore from side channels into wheelbarrows and taking them into next room. Party stops to chat. (50 exp)

- Group informed that Priscilla Theratrix, Vivimancer, runs this joint. Party decides to talk to her. (50 exp)

- Next room contains dead-eyed people walking up walls carrying globes of gore and applying them to the head of a giant hanging from ceiling. Bandage-faced people look on from balconies. (50 exp)

- Party continues, John Doe is allowed into Primilla's chambers due to weird morphology. She has a hot body and huge, whiskered, ovoid head. She's pleasant enough though. (50 exp)

- John agrees to get a particular necklace for her, one of those looted from the Foxlowe Estate. In exchange, will fix up John's body. Priscilla gives JOhn her head, tells him to use it to pretend she's been killed (50 exp)

- Group leave, artfully telling nobody about the dead dog-hydra, and rest the night. (50 exp)

- On the way back to Fate, the party smash through a bunch of skeletons no problem. Chariot charge very helpful in this regard. (50 exp)

- Nearing Galth, bugles sound and the gates open and a bunch of cavalry ride out with banners flying. What will happen next?! (?!?!?!?) (50 exp)

Total: 750 exp

Misc:
- Antagonist Appeaser bonus (50 exp)

- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)

- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)

- Headtaker bonus (50 exp)

- Infamy Increase bonus (50 exp)

- Kill It With Fire bonus (50 exp)

Total: 300 exp

Active Businesses:
- Peggy Pigrider - Pie Mama's. Safe. Value: 1213sp
- John Doe the Unlucky - Anvil, Mining and Craft Company. Risky. Value: 1579sp
- Lulu Spiderbite - Clunge Honey. Safe. Value: 1190sp
- Joe Joe - Josephine's Petting Zoo. Risky. Value: 1500sp
- Stabbington Shanks - Tomb Busters. Risky. Value: 600sp

Quests and Rumours:
- Living outside the lawwww means nobody to chat to.

Death Toll and Injuries:
- So many barbarians

Exp Totals:
Kyle / John Doe the Unlucky, Level 5 Dwarf: 27853 (Level up at 35200)
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 5 Fighter: 22922 (Level up at 32000)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 4 Barbarian: 14036 (Level up at 16000)
Charles / Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 6503 (Level up at 7000)

[[]]

Absent or Retired:
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 3 Halfling: 5047 (Level up at 8000)
-- Bat-Thing, Level 1 Frankenbat
Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 2342 (Level up at 4500)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 1081 (Level up at 2250)
Sarah / Mana, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 881 (Level up at 1500)
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)

Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)
James / Quarion, Level 2 Elf (Gremling): 4965 (Level up at 6000)
Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
David / Theras, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4965 (Level up at 6000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 65 - Priestknobs and Broomsticks

So firstly and most importantly - Happy birthday Ollie! I was meant to send this yesterday and so it would have been timely, but alas it has been sitting in Drafts.

Secondly, our usual Mad Hatter venue has been wrested from the grip of the D&D Meetup group next week (13th October).
Apparently the guy who books the space does it in blocks, and a random group booked it out before he booked the next batch. Oh well!

Charles suggests this as the venue - http://thetradinghouse.uk.com/location/London
So we'll go with that unless somebody has any strenuous objections or strong opinions on the place.

Put more succinctly:

On Tuesday 13th October we will be playing at the Trading House pub.

For Fraser - Hopefully you get this one! I misspelt Govan as Goran, so some guy called Fraser Goran is probably confused as to why he's been receiving these messages!

I was about to write "let me know if you're still not receiving these" then realised how silly that would be.


Session 65 - Priestknobs and Broomsticks

Campaign Date:
Wednesday, 18 October, 1549
Moon Phase: Waxing Crescent
Zodiac: Virgo

New Characters:
- Skirr, a Specialist equipped with a fancy robe and little else to his name.

Enemies Defeated:
- 32 huge mangled Frankenstein bat creatures, slain or mind-controlled or roasted or forced to flee (800 exp)
- 15 witches on broomsticks, some slain and others forced to flee (750 exp)
Total: 1550 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- Nothing?! Except for, of course, a swiftly returned bishop's robes and chain of office.
Total: 0 exp

Exploration:
- Travelled 72 miles (240 exp)
- First party to enter Galth (500 exp)
- First party to enter Galth Cathedral (100 exp)
- First party to enter the Fleshworks (100 exp)
Total: 940 exp

Events:
- Unwilling to go sell their loot in Fortress City Fate due to having just murdered a bunch of cops, the party offloads their loot to Lulu and co who have just shown up. (50 exp)
- While Lulu's group heads off to the city, the rest decide to head to head off into the countryside before word spreads of their alleged misdeeds. (50 exp)
- The walled town of Galth seems to be a staging post for the army and a refugee camp for those escaping the undead. In the hopes of curing John Doe, they head to the cathedral. (50 exp)
- Lulu's group reach Fate, Jojo immediately runs off to find the zoo while the others deposit cash into the bank and dump the other assets into a safe deposit box. (50 exp)
- Jojo finds an elephant, attempts to mind control it. The elephant becomes enraged and starts trying to batter down the gate, so Jojo goes and repeats her mind-control trick on a bear with similar results. She flees as the elephant rampages. (50 exp)
- In Galth, the main party has entered the cathedral and find much of the place is being used as a refugee shelter. John Doe's abhorrent form means he's passed all the way up the chain to talk to the Bishop himself, who says the best surgeons are in Fate. (50 exp)
- Mana, true to form, tries to pickpocket the Bishop and steal his chain of office. She succeeds, feeling his genitals in the process, although her attempt to knock him out and steal his clothes in plain sight of the entire cathedral is less successful (50 exp)
- Stabbington quietens the angry crowd with a noble speech, Mana is forced to return the stolen property and leave. Lulu's group turns up at this point and the rejoined party leaves at speed. (50 exp)
- A rumour heard at Galth states that there is someone, or something, creating giant fleshy horrors in the Lumps, the hills to the south. The party sets off, and John Doe nurses the faint hope that a fleshcrafter might fix him. (50 exp)
- A roaming band of soldiers is encountered, including a couple of muscle-pound preachers with bandoliers of holy water. They give a few vials of holy water when they find out the plan to raid the Lumps.
- A group of barbarians from Lulu's tribe are found on the road to the Lumps, armed with what they call anti-witch poison. They join the party. (50 exp)
- A swarm of bats and broomstick-riding witches swarming over one particular hill catch the group's attention, they flap over and attack. (50 exp)
- The bats are discovered to be frankensteinian conglomerates of many parts with men's faces and hairy dog bodies etc, during the battle Jojo mind-controls one of them and uses it as a mount. (50 exp)
- Also during the battle, John Doe attempts to grapple a bat-thing and ends up being hoisted into the air and mobbed. He manages to spin around and kill a bunch of them before being carried off to their roost. (50 exp)
- The witches arrive too late to help, one casting a strange spell on Jojo (which she resists) before they fly off. One is shot down from behind and her broomstick is taken, but unfortunately doesn't seem to fly under its own power. (50 exp)
- The fleeing bats and witches seem to have flown into a wide, ominous cave mouth. The party follow, and Lulu finally gets to use her flamethrower to barbecue a heap of bat-things on the inside. The survivors fly off. (50 exp)
- Further in, a stairway upwards has the heads of two slobbery pitbulls looking down. The dogs are fired upon but missed, and hurriedly withdraw. (50 exp)
- A liquidy vomity sound is heard from up the stairs and a wave of burning sludge comes washing down, burning everyone it hits. ON THAT CLIFFHANGER we end the session. (50 exp)
Total: 900 exp

Misc:
- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)
- Diplomacy bonus (50 exp)
- Enmity Inciter bonus (50 exp)
- Nutgrab bonus (50 exp)
- Mind Control to Major Tom bonus (50 exp)
- Ridiculously Bad Rolling bonus (50 exp)
- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)
- Inspiring Speech bonus (Stabbington - 100 exp)
Total: 350 exp + bonuses

Active Businesses:
- Peggy Pigrider - Pie Mama's. Safe. Value: 1213sp
- John Doe the Unlucky - Anvil, Mining and Craft Company. Risky. Value: 1579sp
- Lulu Spiderbite - Clunge Honey. Safe. Value: 1190sp
- Joe Joe - Josephine's Petting Zoo. Risky. Value: 1500sp
- Stabbington Shanks - Tomb Busters. Risky. Value: 600sp

Quests and Rumours:
- A bunch but I forgot to write them down and I won't have a chance to send this off this evening so I'll put them in the next one!
- Most importantly, the Lumps are overrun with fleshy monsters oh no!

Death Toll and Injuries:
- None today, although WHAT IS JOHN DOE'S FATE!??!

Exp Totals:
Kyle / John Doe the Unlucky, Level 5 Dwarf: 27281 (Level up at 35200)
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 5 Fighter: 22350 (Level up at 32000)
Charles / Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 5931 (Level up at 7000)

Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 3 Halfling: 5047 (Level up at 8000)
-- Bat-Thing, Level 1 Frankenbat

Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3416 (Level up at 4000)
Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 2 Muscle Wizard: 2342 (Level up at 4500)

*DING!* +1d4 HP! +1 first level spell/day! +free spell!
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 1081 (Level up at 2250)
Sarah / Mana, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 881 (Level up at 1500)
Gary / Skirr Abderian, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 416 (Level up at 1500)

[[]]

Absent or Retired:

Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)

James / Quarion, Level 2 Elf (Gremling): 4965 (Level up at 6000)
Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)
David / Theras, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4965 (Level up at 6000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 4 Barbarian: 13048 (Level up at 16000)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 64 - Horsing Around / Redonkadonkey / And we said Neigh, we are but Men

Good work everyone! You're cop killers now. It's always been a bit moral-grey-area in this game but I think you've finally tipped over into being the monsters in other people's stories. This hasn't happened before so I'm interested to see where you take it!

On numbers, even the overflow game needs an overflow game at this point, so if you're thinking of inviting friends maybe hold off for a few weeks!
Alternatively if somebody wants to try running a game, your time is now!

I've been out all night eating too much food so I'm too full for email-based witty banter right now. See you next time!

Session 64 - Horsing Around / Redonkadonkey / And we said Neigh, we are but Men

Campaign Date:
Monday, 16 October, 1549
Moon Phase: Waxing Crescent
Zodiac: Virgo
Patron God: Oberon

New Characters:
- Mana, a Specialist mysteriously similar to the recently deceased Alice. Former pawnbroker, decked out in the fanciest clothes.
- Jumarak, a Muscle Wizard mysteriously similar to the recently deceased Jumarak. Former Shingler, armed with roof tiles.

Enemies Defeated:- 12 guards and their guard captain, slain or forced to flee (350 exp)
Total: 350 exp

Treasure and Equipment:

- Some dude's head, removed from where it was sewn onto a horse's neck

- 2463sp from foot lockers in bedroom and looted from guard (2463 exp)

- Emblem of a mercenary company from the continent

- Suit of pikeman's armour (as chain)
- A matchlock arquebus with supply of powder and shot

- A sword

- 2 daggers

- Several wheellock arquebuses

- Key #65
Total: 2463 exp

Exploration:
- Explored the coach house's 6 rooms (120 exp)
Total: 120 exp

Events:
- Party considers options as dawn breaks across a rainy morning, decide to explore rest of manor after resting. Sleeping in the manor ill-advised, coach house presents safer option. (50 exp)
- Inside coach house - coach, stable stalls, dead man crushed by dead horse, standing horse with man's head. Mana loots head. (50 exp)

- Party drag corpses outside, chop off heads and legs just in case. (50 exp)

- Coach house explored, coach driver's belongings found and stuffed into pockets, party get some rest. (50 exp)

- Party awoken at noon by horrified shouts, clomping boots. Outside, armoured guards with guns have found dismembered corpses, wagon full of loot still tethered to donkey. (50 exp)

- Zea exits coach house by front doors to explain, guard yells at him to get on the ground and tells a runner to run for help. Stabbington exits side door to and is also held at gunpoint and disarmed. (50 exp)

- Tension snaps when John Doe drops handful of coins from ceiling, gun goes off in guard's hands and drops Zea. Aurora opens fire from upper floor and nails a guard, sending his gun flying. Stabbington snaps guard in face and steals his gun, Muscle Wizard nails knocks a guard into the loot cart with a flung roof tile (50 exp)

- All the gunfire startles the loot-donkey who starts galloping away past the coach house with guard in cart, rest of party begins firing on guards from upper floors. Aurora's bow basically explodes into splinters, hurting her and Mana. Stabbington shoots guard, goes for weapons on floor while guard flees inside manor. (50 exp)

- Zea heals himself, he and Jumarak jump onto the back of the loot cart as it rushes past. John Doe grapple-hooks on too and begins reeling himself in, Aurora owl-hoots her donkey over and Mogwi jumps on its back and rides after cart. (50 exp)

- Jumarak keeps guard in cart occupied while Zea leaps flashily onto loot-donkey's back and slows it down, begins taking it back to coach house. John Doe skids around on back limbs. Mogwi canters back too. Crowd of onlookers and guards spotted at end of long driveway. (50 exp)

- Most of party begin debating how to get out of estate, Zea grabs fallen gun and goes to finish off guy who ran inside, sees more guards than expected talking to chandelier girl and backs out (50 exp)

- Party continues debating, fire in upper window is noticed by Quarion's acute elf senses. Small contingent of Zea, Mogwi and Quarion investigate. (50 exp)

- Main party reach decision, treasure and most of party will be loaded into back of fancy carriage, others will dress in guard armour and try to get through blockade, Aurora will Command their captain to let carriage through. (50 exp)

- Contingent gets upstairs, finds open doors, man in room filled with burning stuff waving out window. Quarion casts Faerie Fire to reveal the silhouette of a guard. The guard attacks, badly, and the contingent backs out. (50 exp)

- Main group reach gates with carriage and donkeys. Party challenged by guard captain, answer to wrong name and generally bungle things. Aurora commands guard captain to "GO!" and he sets off at a run towards the manor, his troops suspect witchcraft and open fire on carriage. (50 exp)

- Battle is joined, crowd begins to scatter. Guards' worst fears confirmed when the monstrous John Doe swings in with a sword that burns with demonic flame. (50 exp)

- Contingent arrives to join attack, Jumarak punches a hole in reality and Summons a mushroom demon that leaps upon him. He breathes in the weird spores emanating from it. The guardsmen's morale, and possibly minds, break at the sight of so much horrible unexplainable shit and flee screaming. (50 exp)
Total: 850 exp

Misc:
- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)

- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)

- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)

- Infamy bonus (50 exp)

- Headtaker bonus (50 exp)

- Long Deliberation bonus (50 exp)

- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)

- What Could Possibly Go Wrong bonus (50 exp)

- Near Death Experience bonus (Zea, Jumarak2 - 100 exp ea.)

- Failed Saving Throw bonus (Jumarak2 - 100 exp)
Total: 400 exp + bonuses 

Active Businesses:
- Peggy Pigrider - Pie Mama's. Safe. Value: 1213sp
- John Doe the Unlucky - Anvil, Mining and Craft Company. Risky. Value: 1579sp
- Lulu Spiderbite - Clunge Honey. Safe. Value: 1190sp
- Joe Joe - Josephine's Petting Zoo. Risky. Value: 1500sp
- Stabbington Shanks - Tomb Busters. Risky. Value: 600sp

Quests and Rumours:
- None today!

Death Toll and Injuries:
- Also none, despite the variety of guns on display.

Exp Totals:
Kyle / John Doe the Unlucky, Level 5 Dwarf: 26865 (Level up at 35200)
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 5 Fighter: 21834 (Level up at 32000)
Charles / Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 5515 (Level up at 7000)

Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 4018 (Level up at 7000)
James / Quarion, Level 2 Elf (Gremling): 4965 (Level up at 6000)

Wai / Mogwi Stitch-Up, Level 2 Specialist: 2715 (Level up at 3000)

Dana / Bingo Augustus, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 1926 (Level up at 2250)
Fraser / Jumarak2, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 665 (Level up at 2250)

Sarah / Mana, Level 1 Specialist (Thief): 465 (Level up at 1500)

Thank-you-for-running-overflow-game-parity-bonus:

David / Theras, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4965 (Level up at 6000)

[[]]

Absent or Retired:
Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 4 Barbarian: 13048 (Level up at 16000)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 3 Halfling: 4631 (Level up at 8000)
-- Bat (whose name I forgot), Level 0 Chiroptera
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human

Session 63 - Tongue Tied

Apologies for the delay... I may have overdone it on the actual recap.

Oh well!

For James - Your Elf's heartspell is Mending which means you are turning into a Gremling. Your Elf species' florid description is as follows -
"Diminutive borrowers of toys and intricate things, petty breakers of tools left too long in forgotten drawers. Spirits of the unfinished task, cut short by the bent nail or the wrong screwdriver. Mischief achieved they make amends by mending what they had broken, and sometimes more besides. Many a broken marriage has been mended by the ministrations of a Gremling, forecasted by unexpected annoyance and woe"
With two spells in your head, you have pointy elf ears (granting 2-in-6 Search skill) and squinty rat-like eyes (which makes all your equipment count as Quality 1 - the highest quality - no matter how crap it really is).

For all - you (mostly) survived the horrible haunted house, and made an absolute stack of cash. Everyone who survived leveled up, so well done!

I'd better get on with other stuff, so see you all next week!

Session 63 - Tongue Tied

Campaign Date:

Market Day, 15 October, 1549

Moon Phase: New Moon

Zodiac: Virgo

Patron God: Dispater

New Characters:

- A Specialist who is pretty good at a range of things.

- An Elf whose heartspell is Mending, appropriately has a job as a Tinker

- Jumarak, a Muscle Wizard and trapper who once befriended the badger whose skin he now wears

Enemies Defeated:- Erasmus "Spiderdick" Foxlowe, stabbed in the urethra (25 exp)

- Myrna "Foetal Fantasy" Foxlowe, killed by grappling hook to head before attached foetus slain (25 exp)

- Sabrina "Crotch-Stinger" Newguard, insect punched off back, killing host (25 exp)

- Penelope "Granny" Foxlowe, eventually taken down by dogs and a swinging now-rearranged Dwarf (1500 exp)

Total: 1575 exp

Treasure and Equipment:

- 2 wheellock pistols, standard quality (350 exp)

- Variety of deeds and stocks worth a boatload of cash.

- 4 violins (200 exp)

- 3 small figurines of strange workmanship (750 exp)

- 1500cp, 1925sp, 600*gp (33725 exp)

- 10 gold bars (10000 exp)

- 10000sp-worth of fine jewellery (10000 exp)

- A particularly fine necklace (2500 exp)

Total: 57525 exp

Exploration:

- Explored 7 more rooms of the Bloodworth Manor (140 exp)

Total: 140 exp

Events:

- John Doe, Stabbington Shanks and Zea are in trouble. Variously jizz-webbed, burnt, and otherwise stuck to things, they eventually triumph when Stabbington shanks Erasmus in the dick. The bug possessing him fades away. (50 exp)

- Outside, lots of people are showing up and seem surprisingly ok about all the blood and the chandelier girl. (50 exp)

- Alice begins trying to lock-pick the safe in the Study, while John Doe tries to pull it out of the wall with his grappling hook leg. Other people loot the room, finding hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of stocks and deeds. (50 exp)

- The door opposite the study is opened and the family's music room is found. Body stuffed up chimney discovered after lighting fireplace from appropriate distance. Violins and odd statuettes looted, harpsichord earmarked for later removal. (50 exp)

- Alice pops the safe, finding fungible assets worth an absolute ton. On counting, there seem to be slightly fewer coins than one might assume from an initial glance (50 exp)

- Party travels upstairs in single file, opens door on right, discovers nicely appointed guest room. Mattress goes all bloody when laid upon due to skinned corpse in mattress. (50 exp)

- Sobbing child heard behind opposite door, child yet lives despite having been twisted into a horrid parody of the Vitruvian Man. Child's brain and eyes have been separated from body, child's tongue and genitals in a strange symbol drawn in faeces. Alice attempts to loot brain, ruins everything. (50 exp)

- Genitals and tongue burst to life, genitals burrow into Jumarak's arm, tongue begins tongue-wrestling Alice. Alice fiercely tongue-wrestles the tongue until she manages to swallow it, another great decision. (50 exp)

- Lady's dressing room found. The clothes and jewellery are very valuable, although many of the dresses are subsequently ruined by the cloth-tearing hands of Lucados Orbrus in the search for red and yellow material. (50 exp)

- Final door on the floor is tested and a woman begins shrieking on the bed of the master bedroom. Crawling along the bedspread, still attached to the woman, is a foetus. The knowledge that it imbues shakes people to their cores and brings a sliver of doubt into Zea's clerical beliefs. (50 exp)

- Lucados finds himself unable to harm the child, though it is eventually killed after its mother is brained by a grappling hook and the foetus is post-emptively aborted. Lucados wears some intestine like a mask. (50 exp)

- During the fighting, Jumarak and the new Specialist have gone upstairs and investigate some rooms. Jumarak opens a door to find the bug-possessed nanny weeping over an empty cot, and is attacked by her flailing stinger. (50 exp)

- Meanwhile, the Specialist opens her door and finds a pink, frilly room. She goes over to loot a cuddly toy, and the door slams shut behind her. It's Granny. Snip snip. (50 exp)

- Jumarak falls back, leg stung to shit by the stinger. He punches the bug off the nanny's back, killing her. Stabbington  comes up stairs, attempts First Aid and murders Jumurak. Two for two! Jumurak explodes into tongues which fly into the mouths of others. (50 exp)

- Wei's Specialist is saved by others piling into room, everyone piles down the stairs away from Granny while Stabbington and John Doe follow Alice's lead and swallow the tongues in their mouths. (50 exp)

- Alice, in the lead, tries to bust through the ground level door but finds it locked and impossible to open. Granny cackles, and the party turns grim-jawed towards the door. (50 exp)

- An ambush is set at the door in, as Granny enters she's attacked. A lucky crit sends her flying back towards the stairs. Inside the room, Alice's stomach explodes and releases a heap more tongues everywhere. John Doe and Stabbington immediately induce vomiting to get rid of the tongues in their bellies. (50 exp)

- Granny approaches once more and the oh-shit-I-forgot-about-the-dogs are released, including John Doe's monstrous 20HP beast. (50 exp)

- John Doe grapple-hooks to the ceiling and swings in, walloping Granny with the greataxe. Granny grins as he swings past and her arms blur as she snips and rearranges his body into a new form - head embedded in chest, grapple-leg on neck, other limbs coming out of his back. (50 exp)

- Granny is finally defeated, laughing even as she dies. A great insectoid creature emerges from her body before it fades like a mirage (50 exp)

Total: 1000 exp

Misc:

- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)

- Balls to the Wall bonus (50 exp)

- Best of Intentions bonus (50 exp)

- Brutal Kill bonus (50 exp)

- Child Murderer bonus (50 exp)

- Dramatic Battle bonus (50 exp)

- Infamy bonus (50 exp)

- I Immediately Regret This Decision bonus (50 exp)

- Nutshot bonus (50 exp)

- Pyrrhic Victory bonus (50 exp)

- Split the Party bonus (50 exp)
- Why Did You Eat That bonus (50 exp)

- Why Did You Touch That bonus (50 exp)

- Horrifying Realisation bonus (John Doe, Stabbington - 100 exp ea.)

- Mutatis Mutandis bonus (John Doe - 100 exp)

- Failed Saving Throw bonus (All survivors - 100 exp ea.)

- Death's Witness bonus (All survivors - 200 exp ea.)

- Died in your First Session bonus (Fraser's next character - 200 exp)

Total: 650 exp + bonuses

Active Businesses:

- Peggy Pigrider - Pie Mama's. Safe. Value: 1213sp
- John Doe the Unlucky - Anvil, Mining and Craft Company. Risky. Value: 1579sp
- Lulu Spiderbite - Clunge Honey. Safe. Value: 1190sp
- Joe Joe - Josephine's Petting Zoo. Risky. Value: 1500sp
- Stabbington Shanks - Tomb Busters. Risky. Value: 600sp

Quests and Rumours:

- None today!

Death Toll and Injuries:

- Jumurak, exploded into tongues after being invaded by a child's severed genitals

- Alice, exploded into tongues after swallowing a child's severed tongue

Exp Totals:

Kyle / John Doe the Unlucky, Level 5 Dwarf: 26400 (Level up at 35200)
*DING!* +1d10 HP! +Lorebond!
Dominic / Sir Stabbington Shanks, Level 5 Fighter: 21369 (Level up at 32000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +1 to hit! +1 on crit/fumble tables!
Charles / Zea, Level 3 Cleric: 4950 (Level up at 7000)

*DING!* +1d6 HP! +1 level 1 spell/day!
Sarah / Alice, Level 2 Specialist (Robber): Deceased

Sam / Lucados Orbrus, Level 2 Fighter: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
*DING!* +1d8 HP! +1 to hit! +1 on crit/fumble tables!

Fraser / Jumurak, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: Deceased

Wai / Wai's Specialist, Level 2 Specialist: 2250 (Level up at 3000)

*DING!* +1d6 HP! +2 skill points!

James / James' Elf, Level 2 Elf (Gremling): 4500 (Level up at 6000)
*DING!* +1d6 HP! +1 level 1 spell/day!

[[]]

Absent or Retired:

David / Theras, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4500 (Level up at 6000)

Clay / Carthas, Level 1 Fighter: 371 (Level up at 2000)
John / West, Level 1 Cleric: 521 (Level up at 1750)
Oli / Lulu Spiderbite, Daughter of Lord Gorga, Level 4 Barbarian: 13048 (Level up at 16000)
Hayley / Bob, Level 2 Dwarf: 2999 (Level up at 4400)
Niall / Roht, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 722 (Level up at 2250)
??? / Unnamed Cleric of the Garden God, Level 1 Cleric: 0 (Level up at 1750)
Mariana / Joe Joe, Level 3 Halfling: 4631 (Level up at 8000)
-- Bat (whose name I forgot), Level 0 Chiroptera
Florent / Sir Arthur, Level 1 Fighter: 186 (Level up at 2000)
Jamie / Alden, Level 1 Magic-User: 186 (Level up at 2250)
Ben / Thant, Level 1 Cleric: 186 (Level up at 1750)
Mike / Arran Folynn, Level 1 Specialist (Rogue): 186 (Level up at 1500)
Alex / Arhnin, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1518 (Level up at 3000)
Daniel / Davrak, Level 1 Magic User: 976 (Level up at 2250)
Nuno / Temperion, Level 1 Magic User: 742 (Level up at 2250)
Leo / Leo, Level 4 Cleric: 11102 (Level up at 14000)
Liisa / Peggy Pigrider, Level 5 Dwarf: 19420 (Level up at 35200)
-- Mr Pig, Level 1 Porcine.
Aron / Alphonse the Gentleman Barbarian, Level 1 Barbarian: 1184 (Level up at 2000)
Nimrod / U, Level 2 Specialist (Monk): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
Mariana / Aurora, Level 3 Cleric: 3553 (Level up at 7000)
Renzo / (Renzo's next character), Level 2 ???: 3462 (Level up at ???)
Clay / Svalborg, Level 2 Goblin: 2204 (Level up at 4000)
-- Tzani Spillios, Level 0 Scholar
Thomas / Tobias, Level 2 Cleric: 2204 (Level up at 3500)
Josh / Larry, Level 1 Elf (Galumfy Dotard): 383 (Level up at 3000)
Will / Calen, Level 1 Halfling: 1582 (Level up at 2000)
Davide / Golden Junk, Level 1 Elf (Misergeist): 1971 (Level up at 3000)
Pedro / Dexter, Level 1 Necromancer: 1460 (Level up at 2250)
Mark / Marley, Level 2 Specialist: 2850 (Level up at 3000)
Rita / Arwen, Level 1 Elf (Sloomit Waghorn): 643 (Level up at 3000)
Sophia / Ceres, Level 1 Elf (Hollowback Ylfen): 1487 (Level up at 3000)
Alex / Tick, Level 1 Goblin: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Oliver / Pip, Level 1 Halfling: 731 (Level up at 2000)
Ej / Matilda, Level 2 Specialist: 1839 (Level up at 3000)
Sev / Brad the Stabbinator, Level 1 Fighter: 1871 (Level up at 2000)
Harry / Reg, Level 1 Dwarf: 150 (Level up at 2200)
Mike / Lootle Halfstack, Level 1 Specialist: 715 (Level up at 1500)
Aaron / Maura, Level 1 Halfling: 1637 (Level up at 2000)
Matt / Sheik, Level 1 Barbarian: 767 (Level up at 2000)
Shaun / Nagash, Level 1 Necromancer: 817 (Level up at 2250)
rhhjdghjdshgjbleeeh / Elric, Level 1 Cleric: 817 (Level up at 1750)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 12881 (Level up at 18000)
Pawel / Devein, Level 1 Dwarf: 1160 (Level up at 2200)
Marco / Sauron, Level 1 Necromancer: 1530 (Level up at 2250)
Tom / NWA Chuck Langley, Level 1 Cleric: 951 (Level up at 1750)
Ros / Rhea, Level 1 Elf (Capriped): 850 (Level up at 3000)
John / Level 1 Magic-User: 1500 (Level up at 2000)
Dana / Bingo, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 1461(Level up at 2250)
Chris / Crocell, Level 4 Halfling: 12318 (Level up at 16000)
-- Belial, Level 1 Fighter: 1047 (Level up at 2000)
Michael / Mist Urmun, Level 4 Magic User: 9129 (Level up at 18000)
Renzo / Gastani, Level 2 Barbarian: 3000 (Level up at 4000)
Chris2 / Gadling, Level 3 Specialist (Assassin): 4738 (Level up at 6000)
Joanna / Artemis, Level 2 Specialist (Healer): 2250 (Level up at 3000)
George / Magnus, Level 1 Cleric: 1342 (Level up at 1750)
Lisa / Bella, Level 1 Magic User: 1951 (Level up at 2250)
Jacob / Wizard Khalifa, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 430 (Level up at 2250)
Marius' Totally-Not-Necromancer, Level 3 Necromancer: 5111 (Level up at 9000)
Nadav / Frog, Level 1 Fighter: 732 (Level up at 2000)
Charlie / Losh, Level 1 Elf (Habberjock): 309 (Level up at 3000)
Jack / Uldric, Level 1 Magic User: 409 (Level up at 2250)
Kate / Khaleesi, Level 1 Muscle Wizard: 37 (Level up at 2250)
Emmi / Lyrel, Level 2 Necromancer: 2891 (Level up at 4500)
--- Schmidt, Level 0 Human