Session 422 - Ghosts'n Goblins - Halloween Tower Defence Special!

Date: 28th October 1625

Zenith Deity: Oberon
Moon Phase: Waxing Crescent
Moon Face: Pocked Face

New Characters:

- Hidra, a mighty Fighter and former road warrior

Returning Characters:

- Nostradama, a Cleric who is now a moaning zombie!!! A dead foe rises as a fellow zombie per round!

- Nieval the Good, a Specialist who has become a haunted doll!! Possess the being that holds you!
- Ghost Snels, a Cleric who is now a spooky scary skeleton!! +4AC, 1 damage from non-Smashy, if hit Xylophone and swap all players' spooky gimmick!

- Likelangelo, a Specialist who has become a fearsome ghoul!! Unarmed claw/claw that stuns!

- Hidra the new Fighter emerges as a cackling witch!! Foresee die rolls, and throw potions!

- Sulphur the Boo-Gilist is fittingly a g-g-g-ghost!! Pick two of seen/heard/felt, and swap if unperceived!

Events:

--- Halloweeeeeen Gimmiiiiiick!

- All the characters, including newly arriving Hidra who is a Knight of Gryphon, have been turned into SPOOKY THINGS! Some table-swapping occurs while I'm distracted!

- At the front entrance to the now-cleared crumbling castle dungeon, the spooky team look out across the horrible Goblin wastes and see a sea of pumpkin-headed goblins swarming towards them!

- Gifflewim emerges and tells them what they have already ascertained - a swarm of pumpkin-headed goblins are going to attempt to swarm the castle! Defend it with your spooky lives! At the end, the player-voted MVP will gain spooky powers forevermore!

--- Defensive Positions

- The goblins are trying to get to the enchanted crystal bed deep in the castle, so it's a good thing that our heroes have a very hands-on knowledge of the traps! They go to various room, ready to ambush and redirect the pumpkin hordes.

- A loud cackle is heard and the pumpkins invade! Several are mown down in the first wave, those that get through enter the pit trap room and fall in! Meanwhile Hidra mans the mounted repeater crossbows behind the arrow slits and starts mowing them down.

- The boss of the wave is a spooky ghostly version of Likelangelo, named Ghostelangelo! In a dramatic twist, Nieval in his Haunted Doll form possesses the boss monster and makes him jump down the spiky pit! Instant defeat!

--- Ghost Goblins

- The next wave is headed by a split between pumpkin-headed goblins and a new threat... goblins with bedsheets over their heads! OOoOOoOoo!

- In a Halloween twist, the ghost goblins actually act like ghosts! They can fly and go through walls! They are still physical beings though, so the fight is bitter and bloody all the same.

- Hidra heads to the helhound room to unleash some chaos.

- The boss of the wave is Nostrademon! Spooky energy flies out and everyone changes spook-type!

- Hidra grapples the boss while Sulphur joins the grapple and stabs in with the wiggly dagger!

- Likelangelo (spook-type Ghost, no relation to the defeated Ghostelangelo) scares the Nostrademon with a powerful BOO! which scares it away! Defeated!

--- Got That Dawg In 'Em

- There is a baying of hounds from the front door! Goblins in dog masks come slavering forth!

- Likealangelo's witch-stolen familiar Gorrible, a horrible vulture-bat-thing, sweeps forward to attack the goblins who are scampering in on all fours and trying to take people down in packs!

- Nieval, currently a Haunted Doll, possesses a goblin at the back and sends it at its fellows.

- Zombie-form Sulphur is busy sending his zombie minions into combat, then supporting them with a flurry of punches.

- The final boss arrives... Gryphon, Fairy-Tale Prince! It's the Gryphon from before his hundred year slumber come to reclaim his castle! He floats charmingly through the air!
- He is surrounded by the souls of the fallen castle servants and they must all be slain to defeat him!

- The team prepare for desperate combat... until Sulphur realises that this time ghost is indeed a time GHOST and thus vulnerable to a Necromancer punch!!

- He leaps forward and punches the prince straight in the jaw, bringing him under Sulphur's control! Boss defeated!

--- Elucidating Questions

- As the ultimate commander of the Halloween-themed invasion force, Temporal Gryphon knows things about his master Morning Light Mountain. They get three questions.

-- What is its greatest weakness? As a plant, it's vulnerable to herbicides.

-- What are its ultimate plans? To absorb or destroy all other life.

-- Why are you obeying it, and could we get them same? It gives eternal life of a sort, and it has vast knowledge.

--- Trick or Treat!

- Finally, treats! Their labours uncover many strange objects.

-- Hidra finds vials of Frost Mask - an icy substance that frightens fire. Flames will not approach the wearer for a full day. 3 doses.

-- Nieval finds a small friendly kitten with glowing yellow eyes.

-- Sulphur finds magic lipstick. Kissing something while wearing it makes a mouth grow where you kissed which can tell you stuff the thing might know. Lasts d4 rounds. Magic is one-use but the lipstick itself is in a fetching sort of muted rose shade that would look pretty good on him. 

-- Likelangelo claims the Helmet of Delayed Speed. Give up an action this round to get two in the next.

-- Ghost Snels finds Oil of Brutal Noise. When applied, the wearer finds all sounds to be incredibly painful, taking 1HP damage per clash or round of sustained noise. Lasts 10 minutes.

- Nostradama finds a huge regenerating chorizo! Encumbers. 1/10 chance of the magic running out per ration used at once (ie. 3 rations in a meal, 3/10 chance)

Totals: 7000 exp

Treasures claimed:

- See above!

Foes Defeated:

- Countless pumpkin-headed goblins (500 exp)

- Many bedsheet-wearing ghost goblins (1000 exp)

- A load of dog-masked hound goblins (1500 exp)

- Ghostelangelo (500 exp)

- Nostrademon (1000 exp)

- Gryphon, Fairytale Prince (1500 exp)

Total: 6000 exp

OOC:

- Issy the Chronicler (100 exp/level)

- George the Expedition Leader (100 exp/level)
- Kitty the Vanguard (100 exp/level)

- Charles the Triage (100 exp/level)

- Carter the Chef (100 exp/level)

Exp Totals:

- Zoë / Nostradama, Level 6 Cleric of Nonanism: 41376 (Level up at 72000)

- Kitty / Sulphur, Level 5 Boo-gilist: 30981 (Level up at 36000)

- Charles / Nieval the Good, Level 4 Specialist: 13158 (Level up at 14000)
*LEVEL UP!* +1d6 HP! +1 to Saves! +2 Skill Points! +Backstory!

- Issy / Likelangelo, Level 4 Specialist: 8747 (Level up at 14000)

- Carter / Hidra, Level 2 Fighter: 3882 (Level up at 4000)
*LEVEL UP!* +1d8 HP! +1 to Saves! +1 to Hit! +1 to Crit/Fumble! +Backstory!

- George / Ghost Snels, Level 2 Denialist Cleric: 3882 (Level up at 4500)

*LEVEL UP!* +1d6 HP! +1 to Saves! +Faith! +Healing Pool! +Backstory!

Session 421 - Dungeon Clear!

Date: 21st October 1625

Zenith Deity: Dispater
Moon Phase: Third Quarter
Moon Face: Dragon Face

New Characters:
- Ghost Snels, RETURNED! Just different! And a g-g-g-ghost! He is a Cleric of Denialism and as such hates the False Gods.

New Backstory:

- Gryphon was horrified when his hundred-years-and-a-day cursed slumber meant he had outlived everyone he knew. Or at least outlived most of them, given how many of his former aquaintances had turned into shadows and zombies and stuff. Once per session, come across someone who you saw previously this session.

Events:

--- Helpful Goblinos

- The party awaken in the belly of the Wasteland Castle, surrounded by goblins! These are the helpful mushroom-headed goblins they met last time, so it's fine. Gryphon keeps whispering about how he wants to clear them out, but he is swayed by the rest of the party into being cordial.

- The goblins inform them how to get to the final evil haunting the dungeon - a witch called Grendigack!

--- The Route to Grendigack

- They traverse a hall where the pillars are stone women holding up the ceiling. Every time you look away they change positions. Nieval traverses via BMX and it's fine. The head of Gryphon's father says that these statues are enchanted with blood magic seized from Gryphon's veins and keyed to killing goblins only.

- The next room has a well containing clean water... and a bow! Likelangelo manoeuvres the bow out of the well via ten foot pole. It's got a crucifix design, complete with Jesus, and the water from the well curls up to form the string!

- They hand it to Ghost Snels since he is a (very spooky) Cleric. He fires it experimentally at one of Sulphur's necromantic constructs and finds that it can transfer HP on hit! Sadly he's a level 1 Cleric so doesn't have a lot to give.

- He palms it off to the relatively behitpointed Gryphon who summarily shoots him to heal him up.

- Ghost Snels sees a secret door framed in indigo. He persuades Likelangelo to press the brick that opens the door. It opens, but releases a gas that knocks Likelangelo out!

- Hefting Likelangelo's inert form, they continue.

--- Diagetic Memory Loss

- This room is the one where Gryphon awoke. There is a bed with a shattered glass canopy, Sleeping Beauty style, and the walls are daubed with art showing the draining of Gryphon's cursed life-force.
- Gryphon reaches for his favourite pillow and HARK

- He experiences a flash of pure terror and his memories are DRAINED. He wants to get OUT OF HERE.

--- Grendigack

- The next room contains books... and a witch! Likelangelo stirs and slides onto his feet.

- She looks up from her grim green cauldron and declares that she is Grendigack! An awful dog and a huge spider-salamander-thing wind around her feet and a horrible vulture thing lands on her classic witch hat.

- She drains life through memories, for memories are life. She lairs in a library.

- Nieval downs a potion, turns invisible, and surges forth on his BMX. He realises that the witch is really very attractive for an older woman. He seizes the crow-vulture-thing and ZIPS out of the room! It dies, somehow, in his hands. Corpse-smoke flows back into the witch's cauldron.
- Behind him the witch summons shadow. She cackles in the gloom.

- Sulphur blinks away ichor-eyedrops and sees souls. The witch's soul burns with power, connected via filaments to the familiars around her. Sulphur huffs a Last Breath as a parabellum and death-metal-growls at her minions.

- The battle is terrifying. Familiars pounce and, if the witch is hit, die. Then they reform from her effluvia and pounce again.

- Sulphur sends in skeletons which do a startling amount of damage! The witch is on her last legs already!

- Gryphon gets the last hit, decapitating the witch with the crucifix bow and simultaneously shooting himself in the chest to heal.

- The familiars dissolve, the witch turns into smoke, and all flow into the darkly frothing cauldron.

--- Denied Resurrection

- To forestall any bullshit they create a fire and pour her boiling reforming body onto the coals. Very clever. The witch is dead!

- Her familiars are attaching to those who will for them. Gryphon gains Grim Gertrude, granting great gnashing. Ghost Snels claims Flamerge the Spider-Salamander thing, allowing a poison attack. Likelangelo gains Gorrible the vulture-thing, who will counterattack those who try to kill its master.

- The chest in the room contains a skull-shaped ruby that causes fear and drains memories. Along with it are black-and-white pipes that are beloved by rats.

--- Various Treasures

Furthermore, books!
-- #370 - POWERLAD: What Witches Want

-- #284 - On Agriculture

-- #111 Ninhursag, Clathrate Dragon

-- #290 - On Philosophy

-- ## The Isle of Wights

Furthermore, treasures!

-- Nieval finds a Bowel Rope. Formed of woven intestines. Bite the end and it crawls like a snake.

-- Gryphon finds rare spices. 9 meals-worth. Add incredible deliciousness to a meal.

-- Sulphur finds a vial of acid! 1d8 acid damage on hit.

-- Likelangelo finds a Ghost Pendant that allows him to shift into the Ghost Dimension for a round.

-- Ghost Snels finds a Ghost Bomb which, when triggered, heals undead and hurts the living in its radius.

--- Dungeon Clear!

- The dungeon in the wastes is now officially CLEAR despite the occasional resident.

- Gryphon is informed of the many things that his dad did during the long years while he was a sleeping beauty and his dad was experimenting with artificial longevity. Dad seems evil to be honest.

- Gryphon's childhood dog, name of Bigsby, runs up to him as they leave. The dog has a mouthful of ever-burning hellfire. Gryphon doesn't care, the dog is back!

--- Enter the Cook

- They reach the outside and find their campsite.

- Nieval plays the Pied Pipes to summon a bunch of rats, then cooks a meal of "Rats, Cheese, Lard and Bowels" named Ratwurst.
- It's actually nice wtf

--- Postamble

- Gryphon replaces the healing bow into the well, reapplying the healing properties.

- He retires to his ancestral castle. Next time... the Knight of Gryphon??

Total: 10000exp

Treasures:

- 5 books (1000 exp)

- The Bowel Rope

- Rare spices (900 exp)
- Acid vial

- Ghost Pendant
- Ghost Bomb

Total: 1900 exp

Foes:

-The Witch, Grendigack (1500 exp)

Total: 1500 exp

OOC: 

- Carter the Chronicler. Cartographer and Paymaster (300 exp/level)
- George the Expedition Leader (100 exp/level)
- Issy the Vanguard (100 exp/level)
- Charles the Chef (100 exp/level)

Exp Totals:

- Kitty / Sulphur, Level 5 Boo-gilist: 28314 (Level up at 36000)

- Charles / Nieval the Good, Level 4 Specialist: 10591 (Level up at 14000)

- Issy / Likelangelo, Level 3 Specialist: 6180 (Level up at 7000)

- Carter / Gryphon

---- RETIRED! Mentor Perks Unspecified.

- Carter / Carter's Next Character (?), Level 1 ???: 1515 (Level up at ???)

- George / Ghost Snels, Level 1 Denialist Cleric: 1515 (Level up at 2250)

Session 420 - blaze it

 Date: 14th October 1625

Zenith Deity: The Lady
Moon Phase: Full
Moon Face: Pocked Face

New Backstory:

- Likelangelo lost an argument with Manrat because he painted him as a huge rat rather than the true self who is a man! When you fail a save, they pass the same save.

Nieval the Good found a wounded dog and took him home to train as a stunt dog. Beasts don't attack you unless you hurt them first.

Events:

--- The Daemons of Our Worst Selves

- Our heroes awaken upon pews. They look at their skin and see that the black obol-tattoos have become golden and fractal. They shut their eyes and count to ten.
- They leave the hall and hear the jingling of keys towards the dungeon entrance. It is not keys, but coins!

- Manrat's eyes glow golden. Something dreadful has occurred.

They all stagger forth and come upon Gifflewim.
- He states that he has delivered wealth to the natural world, and that Julgoor is dead.

-The richest among us glow golden. The least well off shiver with shadows. The concept of wealth will kill civilizations. Thus he has spoken.

- He tells our party that he will be at every dungeon entrance from now on so long as you call him by his name. If you pay him he'll tell you the best treasure and the worst boss.

- Manrat and Sulfur burn treasures into golden obols that ripple angularly beneath their skin.

-- Check that Checkerboard

- They enter the sunken castle once more. They cross the chessboard swiftly and silently. Likelangelo seizes a crossbow. 

- They swiftly cross the sinking floor in the mushroom-goblin direction, then Sulfur sends a skeleton out to see what happens when the floor descends.
- As they wait, a mushroom-headed goblin declaiming himself Mister Mushgob arrives. They chat.

- There is an elf with a huge sword in this dungeon. There's a witch around here somewhere who cursed the sleeper. She has three familiars. Morning Light Mountain has awakened because someone magically killed everything in a mile radius of a portal to Venus. Many such lore.

- Afterwards they see that the skeleton on the descending floor has revealed that the paintings on the walls have horrific images below, like in the disneyland haunted house ride. Spoopy!
- Mister Mushgob has broken from the immotile Morning Light Mountain by being underground. He's a Hobgoblin of the new era, controlled via updates from the Morning Light Mountain through his mushroom hat, and currently an individual because him and his minions have been underground for long enough to lose connection to the home immotile, whatever that means.

- Did you know that Morning Light Mountain came to Earth on a gold meteorite that swung past the sun before smashing into the planet a few hundred years ago? Few do.
- Several eyes light up.

-- Punched Into Wealth

- Mister Mushgob directs our heroes towards the sword-wielding Elf, who is in his territory but is avoided by the goblins.

- The room in between has a punching bag, a few yoga mats, and not much else beyond some glasses designed for protein shakes.

- Sulfur takes some practice jabs at the punching bag. It hits into something behind!

- Likelangelo feels around and feels an invisible treasure chest. Very cool! He finds the lock and, against the odds, picks the lock.

- Within there is much treasure! Sapphires, a necklace, a mirror that reflects ones' true self!

- Sulfur looks in the mirror and sees an abundance of souls tearing through his body. Cool?

--- Dark Souls

- They find the secret Elf door they were told about.

- There is a note written in the Bibliognost tongue which nobody can read.
- They barge in because they can't read.

- Within there is a monster who has the upper body of a beautiful Elf and the lower body of a slippery (and beautiful for slug fans) slug.

- He demands single combat. George slings me a duel concept.

--- Blow Me Down

- Every combatant attacks, counters, and is blown back by the sword that contains the north wind.

- They fight, fight, swap places and fight again!

- The final blow is from Manrat. In the aftermath he wields the sword aloft and declares his retirement.

- The Elf squishes itself into nothingness and seeps into the floor. He will be back?

- In the meantime our heroes loot the area which is full of books.

--- Readers Digest

- Sulfur reads that the clockwork town of Grendel has that most POWERLAD novels currently going.
- Likelangelo learns that France's greatest invention is the guillotine.
- Manrat discovers that the Rat Hole exists because a great bell tolled thirteen.

-- Mr Mushgob Abides

- They go back to Mr Mushgob and discover that he's got a surprisingly well-stocked kitchen!
- Likelangelo cooks and creates "Gryphon's More-Saka" with lard, cheese, and rat-meat!
- It's alarmingly tasty.

- Over dinner, Manrat declares his retirement.

- There's a room with a magic chest that keeps its insides inside. They feast and ponder.

Total: 8000 exp

Foes:

- The Bibliognost: 1000 exp

Total: 100 exp

Treasure:

- 4 sapphires (800 exp)

- Silver necklace (500 exp)
- Some books (400 exp)

- Silver hand-something? (50 exp)

Total: 1750 exp

Exp Totals:

- George / Manrat Snels, Level 8 Ratman: 124722 (Level up at 224000)

- Kitty / Sulphur, Level 5 Boo-gilist: 26799 (Level up at 36000)

- Charles / Nieval the Good, Level 4 Specialist: 9076 (Level up at 14000)

- Issy / Likelangelo, Level 3 Specialist: 4665 (Level up at 7000)

*LEVEL UP!* +1d6 HP! +1 to Saves! +2 Skill Points! +Backstory!

Session 417 - The Dead and the Devout

Date: 16th September 1625

Zenith Deity: Alaunus

Moon Phase: Waning Crescent

Moon Face: Dragon Face

New Characters:

- Likelangelo, a failed artist (not Hitler!) and Specialist whose art is very much not the strong suit. Maybe it's just too avant garde?

Events:

--- Breach and Clear Off

- After resting in Gryphon's dad's room (RIP in peace) our now mysteriously smaller group made up of Manrat and Sulfur decide to clear the prison section with the goal of turning this castle into their new base of operations.
- They leave and... who's this?? A new character arrives! His name is Likelangelo and he's an awful painter and a real master-of-none of a Specialist. Still, more bodies is almost always good!

- The cell they open is full of midges which fly out and bite people's eyes, it's nasty. Sulfur huffs a Last Breath and sends in a skeleton (name of Gnasher). A grey pseudopod reaches out from under the bed and melts straight through Gnasher's ribcage!

- They close the door. Leave that one as-is, they reckon. Good thing it bars from the outside.

--- Wake Up Dead Man

- They find a net under the bed of the last room in this arm of the prison, and go to the other side which has (get this) more prison doors barred from this side. Manrat sends rats to scout, some return.

- Sulfur sends a skeleton into one of the rooms and it reports that there's a guy in there. Sulfur enters himself, still speaking with the Voice of the Dead, and talks to the shrivelled husk of a man that unfolds itself from the straw pallet.

- The shrivelled man is happy to speak to another with the Voice, and says he'll let everyone leave if Sulfur leaves him a skeleton. Sulfur isn't putting up with that! Necromancer battle!
- Faster than Sulfur can blink, the man is RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM and reaches out with a withered hand, draining a level! He saves so thankfully it only lasts 10 minutes, but he is suddenly filled with fear!

- Sulfur tries out Black Blood Baptism for the first time, punching the withered wight in the stomach and sending black viscera pouring out. It covers Sulfur's entire body in midnight vantablack, grants him a mighty amount of HP, and gives him a draining touch! Alas, there are downsides, like eventually turning into a ghoul if you don't drown yourself in bodily fluids within a few days. Sulfur notes that this is bullshit.

- They trade blows, Manrat contributing nothing of note with Sulfur's rune-hammer, until Sulfur hits the wight with a Confetti Punch and explodes it into confetti! He is surprised himself, that was only supposed to blow a bloody limb off!

- They loot the bed, finding jewels, and Manrat besets Sulfur with a horde of 60 rats which lick and spit all over him. Spit is a bodily fluid, you see, so the black blood washes off under a tide of rat-spit.

--- Our Big New Best Friend

- Minor loot is found in empty rooms until one door bumps into something. It's a massive corpse stitched together from multiple corpses. It's a goddamn Frankenstein! You might be about to say "Frankenstein was the scientist, not the monster" but I counter with the fact that Victor was indeed the true monster in the end.

- It rears up when Likelangelo pokes it with a stick, but Sulfur is there! He still speaks with the Voice of the Dead and subjugates the giant zombie, who he names Ezekiel.

--- Urn Your Keep

- In the final room they come upon a huge urn with a big skull on it. Very goth.

- Sulfur speaks with the entity within... it's Gryphon's auntie Mildred! She says that she will grant three wishes to whoever opens the urn. This seems unlikely, so they get Ezekiel to hoik it onto (and, due to a flap of skin, into) his back to use it as a bioweapon. Or I guess in this case necroweapon.
- There were an ungodly number of urn puns which I will not record here on mental health grounds.

--- Highway to the Flavour Cube

- They leave the dungeon into the "fresh" air of the Drudge Wastes to shake off the cobwebs, cook a meal, and reset the Underclock.
- The air is beset by a Melancholy Mist, bringing a sense of sadness and longing. Bushes swell with fat berries, which Manrat warns them away from. They fill you up, but hollow you out emotionally.
- He then sets up the cooking equipment and with a noxious mix of Lard, Mushroom, Bread, Watermelon and Rat he creates "Gryphon's Flavour Cube". All who smell it gag, all who eat it immediately vomit all over the floor. Good thing that Manrat has cleverly named it after Gryphon so future generations will blame him instead.

--- Pressure

- The next day Likelangelo is still feeling rough (and his player is pooped from jetlag) so stays at the camp while the other two venture back into the broken castle. They've got Sulfur's coterie of Dead with them so it's not as foolish as it sounds.
- They open a large set of double doors carved with the nine-pointed symbol of Nonanism. They haven't tried it before, and within is a large space with robes hung up on the far wall.

- Suspiciously, the floor drops very subtly when stepped upon. They quickly jump back and consider. It's not rocking, it's all pressing down at once like a big pressure plate. It resets back up when they jump off. Hmmm.

- Sulfur sends out a skeleton to the big set of similarly carved doors across the room. Nothing happens when the floor depresses, and it reports back that there's nothing in the next room.

- They surmise that it's a pressure plate that responds to too much weight at once, so they carefully leave the minions behind and investigate the robe rack. There are nine robes, one per deity, and a Nonanist symbol in the pocket of one of the robes which has a holy lustre.

- Manrat takes the symbol and the Alaunus robe (since Alaunus is at Zenith) and heads through the next doors into a dark and gloomy church.

--- Worshippers

- A voice cries out from the darkness, "who goes there? Do you worship the foolish 'Gods' of this planet?"

- Manrat reveals that he's a Denialist and shares their dismissal of the Nine as false gods. This intrigues the voice, and it sends out a sister to frisk Manrat. She emerges from behind one of the grand pillars, wearing fake red elf ears and with red facepaint. 

- Before she can get close, Manrat pulls out his Martian Bible and declares that he is in fact a worshipper of the Red Elves too! The voice approves, but the sister frisks him anyway. She pulls back in shock when she sees what he's wearing under his robe - red plate armour of the Red Elves! He speaks the truth!

- He introduces Sulfur as a "recent convert" as the sisters and the Quislist priest who leads them light the torches in here. It's a large church, albeit recently graffitied with Red Elf propaganda.

- The priest offers them a sermon, food, and shelter. Quislism is a new religion, we must help each other! He offers a 5-man bubble-tent that can only be used by Red Elf worshippers, which they sheepishly refuse. Instead they take the two-man tent and some cured Mushroom Goblin Cap flavoured with butter and lard.

- They also mention that they've heard a Bibliognost Elf is roaming around the dungeon wielding a magic sword. Manrat's ears prick up! He also sometimes hears the snapping of pincers in the ablution room next door, but doesn't know where from.

- Manrat and Sulfur declare that they must ablute and go in. It is nice in there. Nine-way fountain, toilet with running water, wardrobe, chest of drawers, some beds. Manrat finds a big silver Red Elf ear that would serve as a holy symbol too.

- They look around for a secret door and... OH NO! CLIFFHANGER! Half a dozen Shadows swarm out of the toilet and towards our heroes!

Total: 8000 exp

Foes:

- A wrinkled old wight (75 exp)

- A goddamn Frankenstein, subjugated (100 exp)

Total: 175 exp

Loot:

- A net

- Bread (5 exp)

- Mushrooms growing on said bread (5 exp)

- A garnet, emerald and amethyst each worth 500ob (1500 exp)
- Trinkets and gems worth 200ob (200 exp)

- Lard (5 exp)

- An urn containing Gryphon's auntie Mildred

- Nonanist Holy Symbol (100 exp)

- Cured goblin head (5 exp)
- Two-man tent

- Quislist Holy Symbol (100 exp)

Total: 1920 exp

OOC:

- Kitty the Chronicler (100 exp/level)

- Issy the Expedition Leader and Cartographer (200 exp/level)
- George the Vanguard and Chef (200 exp/level)

Exp Totals:

- George / Manrat Snels, Level 8 Ratman: 118217 (Level up at 224000)

- Kitty / Sulphur, Level 5 Boo-gilist: 22311 (Level up at 36000)

- Issy / Likelangelo, Level 2 Specialist: 2771 (Level up at 3500)
*LEVEL UP!* +1d6 HP! +1 to Saves! +2 Skill Points! +Backstory!